"Going to fuck you now," he murmurs.
"Okay," I whisper, my chest rising and falling with my pants.
He leans back, twists, and opens a drawer on the lamp table beside the couch. He jerks out a packet of condoms and pulls one out, tearing it open with his teeth and rolling it down that beautiful length. I don't think too much about the fact that he's got condoms beside his sofa, I just focus on him, and the anticipation building inside me.
When he falls back over me, his mouth drops and closes around one of my nipples. He sucks it into his mouth and gently nips at it. God. That feels incredible. I tighten my legs around his waist, needing him inside me. I don't care if that makes me seem desperate, because the fact of the matter is, I am. I need him, and I need him now.
"Ace, please," I mewl, pulling on his hair hard enough that I know it'll hurt a bit.
He shifts, and then the tip of him is pressing right there. God. Right there. I tilt my hips, edging him inside me. With a groan, he thrusts. One, hard thrust. He fills me, and a cry escapes my lips. Oh. My. God. A mix of pleasure and the most incredible kind of pain explodes in my body as it struggles to stretch around him, to accommodate his size after so long.
///
"Goddammit," he hisses. "Fuck."
He pulls his hips back slowly, and then drives back in. My cry turns into a whimper, as I ease around him. Only then do I feel it, really feel it. With every thrust, the pleasure builds inside of me, starting like a small fire inside my body, burning out until I'm crying out his name, until my nails are gliding down his back, until I don't think I can take it for a single second more.
"Ace," I gasp.
Nothing more needs to be said. His name is more than enough. His thrusting becomes more measured, perfectly timed strokes, rubbing over that bundle of nerves inside me, and before I know it, I'm arching for a final time, gasping out his name as I explode around him. Pulse after pulse of pleasure shakes my body, and my entire world feels like it stops spinning for one blissful moment.
It's just Ace and me.
"Fuck," Ace groans, and then his body shudders, too.
For a few moments, we lay there, both of us panting, both of us covered in a fine sheen of sweat. I run the tips of my fingers down Ace's arms, over the curve of his bicep, over his shoulders, and then slowly down his back. He's got his head nestled in the nook of my shoulder, and his breath tickles my neck. Slowly but surely it slows down, and he lifts off me, eyes holding mine. "You okay?"
Am I okay?
Dammit. That's sweet.
"Yeah," I say in a soft voice. "Are you?"
He nods, leaning down and pressing a kiss to my forehead before removing himself from me and discarding the condom. I sit up, pulling my clothes back on, and then I wait for him on the sofa while he cleans up in the bathroom. He comes out a few minutes later and sits down beside me. For a second, neither of us says anything, because honestly, I don't think we really know what to say.
It wasn't something I think either of us saw coming.
"Do you regret that?" I dare to say, looking over and meeting his eyes.
He shakes his head. "No."
"You're so quiet … "
He rubs a hand down his face, then drags it through his hair. "That's just … it's the first time since … Miranda."
Oh.
I get where he's coming from.
"For me, too."
His eyes widen slightly. "Really?"
"Yeah, really."
He doesn't say anything, he just stares at me with those penetrating eyes.
"Ace?"
"Mmmm?"
"Tell me about her."
TWENTY-ONE
"What was your life like with her?"
"Full," he tells me, his eyes swinging to mine. "She was an incredible woman."
I smile, loving the way his face lights up when he talks about her, the way the lines near his eyes soften, and his face seems to just relax. It's like she is a peaceful place for him, a place where he doesn't have to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. I love that. I know what that feels like.
"What did you love the most about her?"
"Her laugh, she had a crazy laugh. It was kind of what drew me to her, you know? She was standing there, in a bar, head thrown back, laughing. I knew that I had to meet her, just to hear that laugh some more."
That's beautiful.
"Were you different before you lost her? Do you think losing her changed you?"
He thinks about that for a moment. "Yeah, absolutely. She used to tell me I was broody, so I guess some things never change, but I was happier then. I didn't feel anger, or regret, or this incredible sadness. I loved life."