I feel a little better knowing I've contributed something. Even if they turn out to be dead ends.
I cross my arms, and rub my hands over them for a few seconds before asking, "Why do you think he's doing it? Targeting people who have lost someone?"
Ace keeps flicking through his notes, not looking up when he answers. "It usually goes back to childhood. Most serial killers follow a pattern, something that happened, something familiar to them. This man at some stage could have possibly lost someone, or maybe he experienced someone close to him changing due to the loss of someone. There will be a connection in there, somehow."
I nod, rubbing my arms still. "But you don't know what he actually does with these girls when he gets hold of them, before, he"-I swallow the hard lump in my throat-"kills them?"
Ace gives me a kind look, I'm sure he understands how terrifying it is for me to ask that question. "As far as we know, he doesn't harm them physically, but instead does damage mentally. When he's finished, he chokes them and then hangs them from a tree, with a bowtie around their necks."
A bowtie.
I shudder.
"Why a bowtie?"
Ace shakes his head again. "I'd say it would connect to whatever happened to him to make him this fucking crazy. It's a trademark-most killers have them."
"Does he, ah, rape them?"
"No," Ace says, his voice tight. "There has been no evidence of sexual assault. It's purely a mental torture. My guess is he holds them until he breaks them, and only when he's broken them does he kill them."
I press a hand to my thigh, rubbing frantically. It's not making me feel any better.
"It may not be the same thing," Ace tells me, his gaze dropping to the way my hand is frantically rubbing. "We're going to be talking to the victims' families tomorrow again, to see if we can get any solid answers."
"But right now you're assuming it is, right?"
///
"Better to be safe than sorry."
Right.
"We didn't know these other girls were being tormented because a lot of the time no one really knew about it. It wasn't until the third victim that we realized that all three had received messages like you have and had been put through the type of things you are going through. Serial killers are next to impossible to pinpoint. We got lucky here, Hartley. I know it doesn't seem like it, but we did. We got lucky because we may have figured it out before he took you."
"Do you think it'll deter him if he knows you have figured it out?"
Ace scratches a hand over the stubble on his jaw, before sighing and saying, "Honestly, I don't know. It'll either send him packing, or it'll make it more of a challenge. To have police officers searching everywhere for him, keeping his victim safe, it's possible that'll excite him. These people … they don't think like us."
Great, so I just became a hot commodity.
"Would you mind if I read about the other cases?" I dare to ask.
Ace studies me. "I'm not supposed to share that kind of thing, it's against the rules. But I'm going to bend them for you, because I know how I'd feel if I was in your situation. It's a terrifying thing."
"Thank you," I whisper.
He hands me three files. I hold them in my hands, and then, with a deep sigh, I read.
* * *
"I'm sorry, Jacob," I say to the man sitting on my sofa, hands in his lap. "It's just that right now I'm going through a really hard time, and I thought I might be ready for a relationship but after everything that's going on, I'm not. I really like you, and you've been so supportive, but I don't think I'm ready to take the next step."
Jacob's eyes hold mine, and I know I've upset him. I hate that I had to do that, but unfortunately my feelings for him aren't developing. I like him a lot. He's a great guy, one of the best, but he isn't the guy for me. I know that. Time isn't going to change that. I'm not the kind of girl to lead someone on in hopes I might develop something for him down the line. I'd never do that.
"I understand," Jacob says, his voice a little sad. "I wouldn't want you to enter into anything you're not ready for. I really like you, Hartley, but I won't force you to do this with me."
My heart hurts for him.
"I'm really sorry. I wish it could be different, but it just isn't right now."
Jacob stands with a nod. "We were mostly friends anyway, please don't concern yourself over it. I'm just happy to have met you."
"Can we stay friends, then?"