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Bleeding Hearts(93)

By:Jane Haddam


“Was Paul Hazzard angry with you?”

“Paul Hazzard was thoroughly professional,” Sonia told him. “At least, he was in public. Very smooth. Very slick. He had to be. But we weren’t always in public.”

“Oh?”

Sonia pulled her legs up onto the chair and wrapped her arms around her knees. “The second day, there was a very nasty session right before lunch. I had to interrupt other people to speak, because Paul Hazzard just refused to recognize me. It got very tight there for a while. When it was over, I went to the ladies’ room. When I came out of the ladies’ room I saw Paul Hazzard standing a little farther down the hall, near a door I thought was probably the men’s room. It wasn’t. There was another corridor just like the one where the ladies’ room was, only on the other side of the building, and the men’s room was there. Anyway, Paul Hazzard saw me and motioned me over to him, and I went. I had to have been a good two feet away from him when he reached out and grabbed me.”

“Grabbed you?”

“By the waist,” Sonia said. “He pushed me through the door I’d thought was the men’s room. It turned out to be some kind of utility closet. He pulled the door shut behind him and it was absolutely dark in there. And all the time he’s got both his hands around my waist and he’s shaking me. I was too surprised to scream. Then he slammed me against the wall and grabbed my breasts. Hard and tight. It hurt.”

“Good Lord.”

“And then he started talking to me,” Sonia said, “and it was weird, Mr. Demarkian, because he wasn’t angry at me, he wasn’t shouting, he wasn’t sharp, he was using that same low, lulling voice he always used, the same one he used to talk about giving yourself unconditional love and nurturing your inner child. He was even using the same kinds of words. He was saying I was in denial and that my denial was manifesting itself as a problem with authority and that I was afraid to accept love and understanding. It just went on and on and on like that, and the whole time he was talking he had hold of my breasts and he was not being gentle or seductive or anything else of the kind. He was digging his fingers into me. The pain was incredible. I tried to kick him once or twice, but he was too fast for me. I called him a son of a bitch and he told me that just went to show that he was right. I was exhibiting inappropriate anger. I was still furious with my abuser, but I didn’t think it was safe to get angry at Ern so I was getting angry at him instead. At Paul Hazzard. It was insane.”

“It sounds worse than insane. How did you get out of there? Did he let you go?”

Sonia shook her head. “I don’t know if he ever would have let me go. That’s silly, of course. Eventually he would have had to. I guess I mean the situation was beginning to feel eternal, and I was getting more and more scared, and I didn’t really know what to do.”

“Did you call out?”

“I think I did call out,” Sonia said. “I know I must have been shouting, because after it was all over, my throat hurt. I suppose nobody heard me. Maybe everybody was down at lunch.”

“Maybe nobody wanted to hear.”

“I thought of that too,” Sonia said. “Anyway, Paul Hazzard went on and on and on and I kept twisting and turning and trying to wrench myself away from him and all of a sudden it worked. Do you know how that is? His strength must have flagged for just a minute and mine must have had an upsurge and his hold just broke.”

“I know how that is.”

“Well, I ran for it,” Sonia said. “I lurched into the dark in the direction I thought we’d come in, right past Hazzard’s body, and I made it. I fell into some debris. Cans of stuff. I couldn’t see what they were. I kept stumbling around into things and he kept grabbing me and laughing and I got more and more frantic by the minute, but all of a sudden it was all right. I found the door.”

“And you got out.”

“You bet,” Sonia said. “I went flying out of that closet like Rocket J. Squirrel being launched by Bullwinkle. You’ve never seen anybody move so fast. I got out into the hall and it was empty. I couldn’t see anybody anywhere. I just took off. The corridor was off this big open reception space with couches and plants and things in it. I headed for there.”

“Did Hazzard follow you?”

“I don’t know, Mr. Demarkian. I didn’t look back to check. I just ran.”

“And then what did you do?”

“I went back to my room. I packed my things. I called a cab. And I left.”

“You didn’t report this to anybody? You didn’t tell anybody that it had happened?”