I couldn’t continue. How could I tell Calix that I thought there was no chance of him ever finding it in his heart to love me after the sins of my father? I couldn’t - I just couldn’t do it.
“You thought what?” He asked, his hand moving up to where mine was resting against his cheek. His fingers twined with mine and he pulled my hand from his face, holding it. “Tell me, love.”
I blinked, feeling wetness form in my eyes as I thought of the horror of Calix never loving me. “I can’t.”
“Baby,” he whispered. “Let me in. Tell me - there’s something bothering you, I can see it.”
“Calix,” I choked on his name and again, he placed his wine in the sand before taking my glass and placing it beside his. Then, he dragged me into his lap and held me tight.
“I love you, beautiful girl.” He whispered into my hair.
“How?” I breathed and he stiffened.
“What do you mean, how?”
“How could you possibly love me, Calix?”
“I don’t understand the question, Nova.” He said honestly. I knew he was being honest, because I could literally hear his confusion in his voice.
Burying my face into his throat, inhaling his scent, I found the strength to whisper my fears as he had once whispered his to me. “How can you love the daughter of the man who took away your childhood, murdered your parents and left you in a state of revenge?”
For a moment, he was quiet. The entire time the silence beat around us, I held my breath. When he finally spoke, his words lifted the weight of the fear I had been carrying around in my heart. They were so beautiful and perfect and I knew I would carry them with me for eternity.
“I love that girl because even though she is his daughter, she’s perfect. You’re perfect, Nova. In all your softness, you’ve healed me my darkness. I might have lost my childhood, but since I’ve known you I’ve been learning how to play. My parent’s are gone, but I know they would have adored you, Nova. I know that because I remember them and my grandmother has told me, countless times, that my mother would have adored you and my father, her son, would have been proud to know I’d found a woman with your astounding strength and admirable gentleness.” He paused for a moment, but I was too speechless to respond. And he continued. “I’ve carried the need for revenge with me for a long time, love. It’s burned through the good in my soul, leaving me haunted and dark. Until you, I was a man driven only by revenge. Now that I have you, now that I know what love is, I don’t feel the same drive toward revenge as I’ve felt for so long. Instead, I feel the need to move forward with my life - with you.”
My breath caught at the meaning in his words and I stilled in his arms. “Calix,” I breathed. “Are you saying,” My words trailed off and Calix spoke.
“I’m saying I would rather focus on building a future with my wife than I would on ruining the man who destroyed so much of my life.” He pulled my chin up to press a gentle kiss to my lips. “I’m saying that I love you and I need you more than I need to take my revenge.”
“I love you too, Calix.” I whispered against his mouth as my heart swelled impossibly large in my chest. Calix loved me. He really loved me - enough to release his need for revenge against my father. “Thank you.”
He held me tight, his body trembling with emotion as he spoke. “I’ll do anything to have you forever, Nova. I’ll do anything to be the man who makes you smile, every day. I’ll do anything to be the man you lie down next to each night - the man you share your dreams and your life with.” He took in a sharp breath. “If I have to let go of my revenge - for you - I will.”
Pressing my forehead against his, I let his words sink in. Calix wanted a life with me. He didn’t want his revenge the same way he once had. He didn’t need to use me to get to my father any longer. He simply needed me.
The way I was feeling inside - so warm and simply happy - was wonderful. I wanted to assure him that he didn’t need to do anything to keep me. He already had me. I was his forever more. Because somehow, he had found a way into the crevices of my heart. He’d infected the organ with an alarming entirety I had no desire to cure. I wanted to prove to him that there was no action needed to bind me to him - I was already his - bound by law.
So, I didn’t say anything at all. Instead, I wiggled from his lap to stand on the blanket where I pulled my shirt and skirt from my body before tossing the fabric next to the ridiculous hat I’d placed on the blanket. Standing in only my soft pink bathing suit, I moved a few steps backward. Then, I looked at Calix and grinned. “Come into the water with me?”