“You’re asking me on a date?” I asked, trying not to laugh, crying as I did. “I think it’s a bit late for that.”
“No,” he said. “It’s never too late. It’s always possible. I want to go on a date with you now, and next week. In a month from now. In twenty years. I’d like to ask you out on a date when we’re both old, with gray hair and wrinkles. Good wrinkles, though, from smiling too much and laughing.”
“Asher,” I said, hesitant. “Please don’t do this.”
“I’m doing it,” he said. “I need to know your answer. I’m sorry for pressuring you, but I need to know.”
I stood there, quiet, knowing full well I had to deny him and leave. I needed to.
“Yes,” I said, a quiet utterance. Louder, I repeated myself, “Yes.” I stepped forward, fell into his arms. We went to the ground slowly, huddled together. “I’m so scared, Asher. I’m so scared. I don’t know if I can do this.”
“I know,” he said. “I’m scared, too. Please, just give me a chance, though. Please?”
Through my sobs, I asked, “Will you give me a chance, too?”
He kissed me, lay me on the soft carpets in the library and pressed his lips to mine. I melted and all emotion abandoned me except for Asher’s love and affection. Why had I wanted to leave? I knew full well why, but I was lying to myself about the reason. I didn’t want to leave just for Asher, I wanted to leave for me, too. This was so new and unknown and before when it was more of a secret and private it felt different and safer, but now that it was open and public I was afraid.
We lay on the carpet and cuddled and kissed, and I don’t know when exactly it happened, but I fell asleep in Asher’s arms, my lips touching his, comfortable and close.
…
Beatrice and Solomon were arrested and went to jail. More of a high profile place than anything, and likely far more comfortable than they deserved, but Asher never wanted them to be in serious trouble in the first place. He couldn’t understand what had pushed them so far, but he knew it wasn’t up to him to forgive them, either. They’d entrenched themselves too deeply in illegal activities to dodge federal offenses, and there was nothing more he could do.
To help out, Asher had paid the exterminator costs for Robert’s daughter, too. It seemed like the least he could do for the man after causing such trouble in the back room. The first day after the arrest, Robert was shaken up, but after that he seemed peppy enough about it. Later, the bookstore owner said that all the news coverage and publicity surrounding the shop caused a boom in business. Asher grinned when he heard that.
He went to visit Beatrice in jail sometimes, too. He knew he shouldn’t, but he went anyways. She was actually friendly with him now. Her father never came to visit her, no matter how hard Asher tried to convince him. It only seemed to solidify her point towards him that day in the bookstore. He tried not to think about it.
And, actually, it was Beatrice’s idea for him to take Jessika to the Solage Calistoga. She’d already made the reservations and while he could cancel them easily enough, why waste it? Not that he needed Beatrice’s validation, but she said Jessika was nice and that maybe she was wrong. Maybe nice people were fine, and maybe you didn’t have to be rude to people all the time in order to throw your weight around and force them to respect you.
It was very strange seeing Beatrice like this, but he liked it. They wouldn’t get back together—in fact they’d already signed divorce papers and she’d agreed to it readily—but he thought that after she served her time in prison they could become friends. Maybe they were already friends now.
Jessika visited occasionally, too. Asher left her alone in the room with Beatrice once when Beatrice asked him to. He wandered through the hallways, going to the guest cafeteria. It was a sparse, utilitarian place, but he liked the hot chocolate they served. He ordered two cups(one for Jessika later), sat on a screeching metal chair at an empty table and waited.
It was a little sad here, but hopeful, too. Dark greys inside, with bars on the windows. Beatrice had her own cell, of course, and most basic commodities, cable television, access to DVDs and books and most other things. Still, it was imprisonment. But when he looked outside, he saw a glimmer of what the prisoners must know. A few birds chirped and flew around the prison grounds and offered a view of happiness.
…
“Alright,” Beatrice said, completely serious.
I listened to her and nodded and I felt somewhat awkward but she’d asked specifically if she could speak with me alone, and then Asher had left, so…