Billionaire Romance Boxed Set 2(208)

The truth of the matter was, I didn’t belong here. I knew that before, but I knew it even more now. With all that happened, this wasn’t the right thing to do. Not just for me, but for Asher, too. I’d caused him so many problems, caused him so much grief. He’d say that it wasn’t my fault, and I understood that it wasn’t entirely my fault, but to some degree it was. I could have gone to the police myself, could have prevented a lot of this. I could have…

I don’t know exactly what I should have done, but there were a lot of things I could have done, and almost every single one of them seemed better than what I had done. I wasn’t the sort of person Asher needed in his life, whether he thought he loved me or not. And, it didn’t matter if I loved him, because that was beside the point. If I truly loved him, then I’d do whatever I could to make him happy, including leaving so he could move on with his life and become a better person without me.

I waited, laying against the couch, staring up at the ceiling. I saw the slight gap where the projector came out and pointed to the screen that descended above the fireplace. We’d watched two movies on it—his favorite movie, and mine—but no more. I teared up a little thinking about that. I’d see plenty of movies in the future, but none of them with Asher. I couldn’t. It was impossible.

I stumbled off the couch and staggered towards the stairs. Shuffling up to the second floor, I went into the master bedroom. Neither of us had bothered to make the bed after we left it this morning, so it was still a mess. The silken shirt Asher had used to tie me to the headboard lay in two ragged pieces on the floor, and he’d tossed the blankets into a pile by the foot of the bed, too.

We left a stain, I noticed, smiling. Nothing too obvious, but I knew where and what to look for and saw it immediately. I laughed thinking about it, thinking, and…

I burst into tears. This was really too much and I needed to stop doing this to myself. I ran into the bathroom and grabbed my things, then ran out just as quickly and shut the door. Making a beeline for the bureau, I held my hand up to the side of my head to block my view of the bed. I only had a few of my own belongings here and I snatched them up from the bureau, then stuffed them into my empty duffel bag laying limp near the bedroom door.

That was everything, that was it. I left the bedroom and closed the door behind me, unwilling to look back.

I raced out of the house as quickly as I could, out and into the open air of the estate grounds. I wanted to ask Jeremy to drive me home, but I realized I couldn’t. I needed to walk, because otherwise he’d tell Asher and I didn’t know what Asher would do.

I trekked to the front gates, quick and frantic, and tried to push them open but they wouldn’t budge. Jeremy always opened them with a remote on the dashboard of the car, but they should open some other way. Some button, or something on the inside, right? I dropped my bag and went to the side of the gate to look for the opening mechanism.

I found it, pushed the button, and the gates began to open. As soon as I picked up my bag, the gates began to close again. I dashed towards the button and pushed it once more, but before the gates even opened an inch, they started closing again.

Off to the side I saw Jeremy, remote in one hand, phone in the other. He was doing something with his phone while making sure the gates remained closed. I tossed my bag onto the ground and stomped over to him.

“What do you think you’re doing?” I asked.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he replied.

“I’m leaving.”

“Why?”

“Because,” I said. “I don’t belong here, Jeremy. I shouldn’t stay here. Asher’s better off without me. I don’t deserve any of this. This isn’t…”

Asher stumbled out of the house. He wasn’t in any serious pain, nor did he have any serious injury, but I knew he was more than a little out of it after what had happened only an hour or so ago. He sprinted across the grass, along the driveway, towards where Jeremy and I stood.

“What’s going on?” Asher asked.

“She’s leaving,” Jeremy said. “Apparently. I don’t know.”

“That’s right,” I said. “I’m going home.”

“Why?” Asher asked. He looked so upset. Why was he upset?

“I can’t do this, Asher. I just can’t do it.” I was crying. Why was I crying? “I want you to be happy, but I can’t do it! I need to leave before I change my mind. Please tell Jeremy to open the gate for me.”

Asher grabbed me. He bent down and swooped me into his arms and I kicked my legs and flailed my hands.