“No,” I managed to choke out. Marta turned back to me and leaned forward.
“Terribly sad. Do you want to know something?” Her voice was a conspiratorial hush. I didn’t want to know anything more, in fact, only wanted to jump out of my seat and run, but Marta kept talking like nothing had happened. “When he lost her, he blamed himself for it.”
“L—lost her?”
“In the car accident. He was driving, but of course it was a bad road, icy. They never do maintain those back roads too well. Not enough salt to keep the ice away, even if the paparazzi hadn’t been chasing them around it would have ended the way it did. Just a bad patch of ice, anyone would have hit it.” Marta didn’t notice my exhale, my fingers wiping away the unshed tears from my eyes.#p#分页标题#e#
A rush of conflicting feelings jostled for place in my heart. Relief, that Eliot didn’t have a wife—guilt, for feeling relief. A newfound hope that I crushed down inside myself with caution, for I knew I couldn’t get too close to him. And an overwhelming sense of sorrow, not just for Eliot’s loss, but for the burden on himself that such a loss must have created.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” I managed to stammer out words, even if I didn’t know what I was saying.
“Of course you didn’t, poor thing, he doesn’t talk about it with anyone. Too proud, too distant. Otto is the same, in many ways. Keeps to himself.” Marta sipped at her water and snapped her fingers above her head. “Waiters aren’t worth a damn here. Are you alright?” She had just now noticed the expression of shock on my face.
“I’m fine.” I wasn’t, but that wasn’t Marta’s fault. I couldn’t help but think of how guilty Eliot must feel. Marta reached across the table and took my hand in hers,pressing her palm down sympathetically.
“Well, I’m so glad he’s found himself someone to keep company with.”
I extricated my fingers from her grasp and took a sip of the water in front of me. It tasted faintly bitter and I swallowed, my eyes downcast.
“I’m just here for the internship,” I said. In my heart, though, I hoped against hope that I could be more to Eliot than a student.
CHAPTER TEN
Eliot passed the time in his study, working on his projective algorithm problem. He knew that he was on the cusp of something, but he couldn’t figure out exactly how to make it work. Each avenue he tried got cut off at the crucial pass, and then he would have to start over again with a new guess.
Brynn came back from the lunch later in the afternoon. He opened the door to her knock, only to see her carrying a half dozen shopping bags in each hand. He waved to Marta in her car as she sped off down the driveway. A tension inside of him released when he saw Brynn again, safe and whole. He leaned forward to take her bags from her and was surprised when she kissed him on one cheek, then the other. His heart stirred at the pressure of her soft lips against his skin, and he wished he had taken the opportunity to shave while she was gone.
“I’m sorry,” he said, hefting her shopping bags in one arm and looking at her new outfit. “I’m hosting an ill-dressed American girl here in my home. Do you know where she might have gone?”
“I was not ill-dressed, only ill-dressed for Budapest,” Brynn said, a frown crinkling her nose in mock anger. She strode past him and knelt down to pet the kitten who already seemed to know her step and who had come out of the recesses of the castle’s rooms to greet her.
“So glad to see you’ve adjusted to the climate.”
“It’s adjusting to me…the sun is so nice outside, I’d swear I was in California if there wasn’t so much snow on the ground.”
“You bring the sunshine with you,” Eliot said, the words escaping his lips before he could stop them. He knew he shouldn’t be saying sweet things, shouldn’t be leading her toward anything unprofessional, but he could not help the swelling in his heart when he looked at her bright face.
“Can we go exploring?” Brynn looked up from petting the kitten, and her eyes sparkled.
“Yes, of course,” Eliot said. “Just let me put on some boots. I was working on the projection proof.”
“Oh, well, I don’t want to keep you from your work. I can go by myself.”
“No, let’s go together!” Eliot felt a rise of enthusiasm in him, and he did not know from where it came. “I could use some time to clear my head. And I don’t want you out there alone.”
“Right, right. Can Lucky come?”
Eliot looked at the small kitten and tilted his head in consideration.