“Samuel, you don’t understand the type of debt that we are in. It is the type of debt that makes one a slave, a prisoner in your own house. That is what my family is facing. It is not as easy as you think, trust me.” Sarah began to cry. She wanted more than anything for the situation to not be so. She wished that her father was still alive, or that he had already paid off the farm and the house. She wished that Samuel was wealthy and could help somehow. But the truth was none of these things.
“Mary, we will figure something out. God always provides for those that love him right?” Samuel hoping to offer some comfort.
“Right,” whispered Mary. She wasn’t sure if she believed it.
John kept waiting for a response, but none came. He turned around to leave when suddenly the door opened. “Who are you,” asked an old lady. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I have never seen your before stranger.” The lady sounded kind enough. But why wasn’t it his family?
“My name is John Schrock. I grew up in this house. I was expecting my family to still be here. Who are you?” Asked John.
“My name is Sarah, Sarah Yoder,” she said. “The Schrock’s haven’t lived here in years. How is it that you grew up here but you did not know that they are no longer here. Wait you must be…” Sarah stopped in mid-sentence. “The prodigal son...returned.”
“I gather that is how I am known around these parts,” replied John. He hadn’t figured out if that was a good or bad thing yet.
“After you left, your family history has not been so good. You better come in. I don’t want you to hear about all of this while you are standing up. Be seated.” She offered him a seat in a rocking chair. “Parents always know that there is a chance that one of their children will leave. You don’t know what it is like on a mother to see her son go off on rumspringa. It is a painful time, filled with worry and prayer. But, you came back from rumspringa, didn’t you.”
John nodded. Rumspringa usually happens in the mid teenage years he remembered.
“So when you came back, your mother was thrilled. She thought that you had returned for good, that you would remain a good and true and loyal Amish son for the rest of her days. But something happened. I wasn’t here, I don’t know why you left. But I knew your mother and I know that you left, suddenly even, before your 21st birthday.” The old lady got up to get a glass of water. “Here drink this, you look like you have had a long day.”
The water was good. “I did leave. Looking back I don’t know why. I regret it now, but I can’t take it back.” John was beginning to fear the worst. “So what happened to my mother and father and the rest of my family. You never got to that part yet.”
The old lady continued. “Your mother was stricken with grief the likes of which I had never seen before. You were her oldest, and she loved you more than you know. I don’t think that any son could possibly understands how much he is loved by his mother. I have had sons myself, I should know. Your father did not take it well either. He blamed himself. Eventually your mother fell into such deep depression that she was bedridden. She was that way for years and years. It was around five years ago when she passed away. So you must have been gone for four years by that point.”
“My mother is dead?” John looked incredulous and then nearly hysterical. He had come home to face his problems, but not this. “My mother is dead? And what happened to the rest of my family?” He was near tears now.
“Your father, Jeremiah, was filled with great sorrow over your loss and then your mother’s death. He couldn’t maintain his duties on the farm because of it. He would wander outside at night, seeking you or his wife, or for God to send an Angel. Anything besides the loneliness of his own home. he had to sell the farm and the house to pay off his debts. Now he lives a few miles from here in a small cabin. I believe that his children still stay with him, helping him cope with day to day life.”
John wanted to run. He wanted to call the cab to pick him up and take him back to the city. He would go back and get a nice hotel room and go online and look at his bank account. He had accumulated a lot of money while he was gone. He wanted to spend it on nights on the town and going to movies and shows. He wanted to do anything that would numb his mind to what he had just heard. But he knew he couldn’t. He was in this situation because he had done what he wanted to do. He knew the only way to break the cycle was to do what he should do.
“You must take me to my family. I must see them, I can still help them,” Said John.