Deborah’s heart was warmed. “And cooking for you feels like cooking for my own family,” she responded. “It is great to have you around the house. It is good to have a man around here.” She was referring to the loss of her husband.
“Yes…” Samuel didn’t know how to respond in light of their recent tragedy. “I am glad that I can help bring some comfort.” He hoped he had said the right words.
Deborah and Mary looked like they wanted to change the subject, as the pain was clearly too fresh for polite conversation. “Well, are you going to the get together tomorrow night?” Asked Mary. She cringed inside. It was a very awkward time to ask the question. But, she assumed he probably was, since most of the community would be there anyway.
“Of course,” replied Samuel. “Now, enough talk about personal matters. Let us dig in and enjoy this great feast.” He began to pray. “Lord in heaven, we thank you for bringing all of us together. I thank you for the strength of this family to carry on in in the midst of tragedy. But we know that you have a plan. In your name we pray, Amen.”
“Thank you, Samuel,” said mama.
The dinner was duck and mashed potatoes. It was good as always and everyone enjoyed it and got their fill. Mama served dessert after, cherry pie. Ruth was too full to have more than a small piece. Samuel and Mary were too modest to want to eat a lot of it in front of each other, and mama didn’t want to gain weight. They all talked, and laughed and enjoyed the evening. Mary treasured these times together.
“You do still intend to stay the night, right Samuel,” asked Mary. The plan was for him to stay since he was now officially courting her.
“Yes, Mary, of course. I don’t have to be back to the farm too early either.” Samuel was clearly excited. He had stayed over before, bundling with Mary. They were here favorite nights.
Mama led them to Mary’s room, which had the bundling board in place. “Now you two enjoy the night together. I remember when I was your age, and I tell you it goes by quick.” Mama gave Mary a kiss goodnight and hugged Samuel. Mama left the room.
“Samuel, we have known each other since we were kids, and I just think that it is so good that we don’t grow tired of each other,” said Mary. She was hoping to probe Samuel’s mind more. To see how much he really liked her.
“I have thought long and hard about that,” replied Samuel. Mary held her breath. Thinking was not always the best thing to do while courting. “But I think we should lay down first before talking.” They both got into bed, with the short bundling bored between them. “I like you a lot, and I have been thinking that we need to talk to each other in a more serious fashion. We have always been great friends, but we always seemed to just have fun and mess around with each other. Shouldn’t we talk about life, what we want. Our dreams for the future?”
This is what Sarah feared. She didn’t want to talk about serious matters, because serious matters depressed her. And she realized that such things didn’t come easily with her and Samuel. “I think that I can see your point. I just know that I want to be a good wife one day that supports her husband. What more could a girl want?”
“I know you want those things, and they are commendable and I love you for that. But I don’t think that you are telling me everything about what is going on with your family.” Mary could tell that it was hard for Samuel to talk about these things.
“The truth is, ever since father passed, we are having trouble paying all of our bills. We might not be able to keep the house and the farm. Mama and I are very scared. I know it is not what you want to hear. I know you want me to be happy and carefree. But that is the truth of the matter. I am sorry that I have to tell you these things.” Mary’s voice was filled with sorrow as she fought back tears. But she told the truth, even though she knew she was disappointing the person she cared for most.
“Mary, you know that my feelings for you cannot be dampened by financial problems. What are you worried about?” Samuel was trying to encourage her.
“I don’t know how I can leave mama with all of this going on. Am I supposed to expect you to just live with me and mama. Is that the kind of life you want? I couldn’t hope that for you. I care for you too much. I hear you talk. I know your dreams. You want to own a lot of land one day, to have a large family and to see your children run free. You want good things Samuel. I want those things too. But I feel like if you are with me you won’t be able to have them.”
Samuel was beginning to understand the situation more. “We could work hard now and help your mama out and then one day we could be on our own”