“Men might not seem incapable of showing emotion, but we both know that they feel deeply. I don’t want you to use him and then to toss him aside when you’re done with him. Remember, I still have to work with him and having him moping around the office is not going to be good for anybody.” I left it at that, feeling like I had done what I had come over here to do, but in an entirely different way.
“I know that you wanted me to get the skinny on her and I think that I did that. I’m just not sure if I should share with you something that she told me in confidence. It would be wrong. I think that I’m going to need some convincing to betray her trust.” I’d found him lamenting over what Julia had done when he came over after getting knock down drunk with his friend.
“I acted like an idiot last night. I fell into the same habits. I shouldn’t have gone over to see her in that state. I was feeling horny. That’s no excuse, but it is an explanation. Let’s just say that she wasn’t very receptive to a booty call at midnight. I didn’t want to make her feel dirty. She probably thought of herself as nothing but a piece of meat. The slam of the door in my face sobered me up very quickly. I don’t know what I was thinking. I just need to know from you if I’m wasting my time. I need to make amends, but I don’t want to grovel unless I think that this is going someplace.” I had him by the short hairs and I could twist her words in my favor.
“You should’ve treated me like a sponsor last night. If you had called me and told me what you were planning, I would’ve cut you off at the pass. We all do stupid things in the name of so-called love. I’m guessing that you didn’t feel very good about how you felt after seeing your friend. You wanted to make yourself feel better by going to her and getting some of that tender loving care. You should’ve gone home and slept it off. By making an ass of yourself, you took away all the hard work that you’ve accomplished up to this point. I have some good news and some bad news.” I was going to be straight up with him and not sugarcoat it in any way.
“By all means, tell me the good news first and then you can drop the bombshell of the bad news.” I had him as a captive audience and there was no way that he was going to leave that spot before I told him what I needed to say.
“The good news is that she does want kids and marriage. The bad news is that she’s not sure that you’re capable of that kind of commitment. I’m not even sure that it matters, considering that she’s thinking about walking away from her medical studies for something more her passion. I don’t want to go into detail, but she has confessed to me that she’s only going to be a doctor because she thinks that she’s obligated to do so.” I found it easy to tell him what she had told me in confidence. I had nothing invested in her future, but mine was an entirely different matter altogether.
“I knew that coming from a big family that was a possibility. She has told me several times about growing up with overachievers. I should’ve seen that she wasn’t happy with her current direction in life. I don’t think that you have to tell me what she really wants to do. Cooking is something that she excels that. I would be damn fool to stand in her way and maybe it’s best that I let her go before things go too far.” I didn’t have to say anything. He had come to that conclusion on his own. I was just afraid that he was the kind that was going to pull the Band-Aid off slowly instead of quickly.
“I wouldn’t blame you for following her. If you really think that you have a future with her, then you need to tell her that whatever she decides that you will stand by her.” I was being a good friend and squeezing his shoulders while he was sitting there at the desk. It was a good way to remind him that I wasn’t going anywhere.
“That’s just it. I don’t know if we do have a future. I can’t ask her to wait for me when her passion is calling her. I have no interest in leaving, especially if we are only dating. I will say that the last few weeks have been fun and that’s without the sex.” I still couldn’t believe that in the few weeks that they had been seeing each other that they didn’t consummate. What I had seen was something for them to relieve any expectation. I doubt that he was the only one that was on the receiving end of oral foreplay.
“To be devil’s advocate, you still don’t know where she stands. The only way that you’re going to find out is to sit her down and have a frank discussion. This is no time to shy away from ‘the talk’. It’s better that you know now than to think that you have something and then learn that it wasn’t as strong as you thought it was. I would never try to tell you that she wasn’t right for you. That’s something that you’re going to have to decide for yourself. I just think that it would be better for the both of you to either step back or take things to the next level. I don’t know Julia that well, but what I do know is that she is an honest person. If you ask her out right, I’m sure that she will tell you what you might not want to hear. Be sure that you want to know the truth. It’s one thing to think that you do, but another when you are given a dose of reality.” I had tried to manipulate his feelings, but I was feeling that guilt for turning their words against them.