I was 5’9, 170 pounds with a mixture of black and red in my hair. I made my own clothes. I’d always been a creative personality and that led to me sending in a couple of my building designs to a well-known architect.
August Rivers had actually taken an interest in me. To have him personally invite me to his office was unheard of. I had heard the rumors of the way that he treated the female staff under his watch. I didn’t think that I had much to worry about. Those photos of him out and about were with those girls that were airbrushed into the perfect specimens.
“If his tongue doesn’t fall to the floor, then he has to be gay. There are certain things that men have a hard time looking away from. You guarantee that you’ll have a line around the block to talk to you.” My type was an acquired taste but was becoming acceptable in this day and age. I only wished that this was the case in high school and college, but for the most part, I was that wallflower hanging back and looking in from the outside.
“I appreciate the effort to butter me up and make me feel more confident, but I’m already nervous as it is.” I grabbed my purple leather jacket and covered the black slinky dress with the accompanying white belt.
“I would wish you luck, but I don’t think that you need it.” Tina had her blond curls into pigtails giving her that innocent look. Those that knew her well enough would know that there was nothing innocent about her. She was my roommate, but she was always with a different man every week. I just couldn’t bring myself to being with a man for the fleeting chance of 5 minutes of pleasure.
“From your lips to god’s ears.” My mother had always told me that I was never going to amount to much and that really did do something to my self-esteem. It was bad enough that I was struggling with weight issues, but to have her constantly berate me made it necessary to leave her in the dust after graduation.
I hadn’t been home in over two years. My older sister Carol keeps trying to lure me back to the homestead for the holidays. I always come up with some lame excuse to get out of it. She was always that golden child that I couldn’t measure up to. There was no way that she knew how our mother treated me. I got the feeling from my mother’s disapproval that my pregnancy somehow ruined her life.
I got into my old grey and dismal Toyota and prayed that it would turn over. I waited and then I turned the ignition and heard the rumble of the engine come to life underneath me. I could smell the exhaust fumes coming through the floor. My inspection was coming up soon and I had a feeling that I was going to need a lot more than I had in my bank account to get this thing road worthy.
I put it into gear and it backfired making a young man in front of me crossing the street almost wet himself in fear that it was a drive by. Chicago did have its fair share of crime. There was no way that anybody could leave their doors open unless of course, you wanted your stuff to be pawned. I had a baseball bat by my bed and I knew had to swing for the fences.
I drove down the street at 9:00 AM on a Monday morning and I saw these people moving along like sheep and I realized that I was one of them. Bumper to bumper traffic was not uncommon for this time of day. I had to give Tina credit for being able to lounge in her pyjamas. I needed that security and I had been pounding the pavement to find my dream job for the past five years. It meant that I had to take on temporary jobs. I think that I let my mother’s words distract me and make me feel that I wasn’t worthy of anything good in my life.
I was never that adventurous in the bedroom. I had seen some things on the Internet that made me cringe to even contemplate doing them myself. Positions were relegated to the vanilla missionary on a bed. That was probably the reason why I could never keep a boyfriend for any longer than six months before he decided to pull the plug.
I arrived at the building and I was in awe. I stood there after paying for parking and looked up and marvelled at the intricate design that went into bringing something like this to life. August was known to think outside the box. It was the one thing that we had in common.
I had a black satchel over my shoulder and I reached in and pulled out the magazine with his photo on the front. He always dressed to impress wearing finely tailored suits that fit him like a glove. There was nothing that he could do to hide those muscles from bulging in all the right places. There were times when I used his image to satisfy my longings. I could only imagine what he looked like under the suit. He had the tendency to wear a power red tie.
I went into the building and it made me feel like a fish out of the water. My mouth was dry and I continually licked my lips. I signed in and I took the elevator up to the top floor. When the door opened, I was accosted by a black and white motif. It was a classic choice that had never gone out of style. The secretary behind the desk looked up with her glasses perched on the edge of her nose. She gave me that critical eye.