I watched her pull away from me once we were home, though I knew that she couldn’t deny the feelings and attraction between us.
They were heavy in the air as she talked about the interest she’d received once we got back. Caroline sounded excited when she told me about what each company offered, making my heart drop when she said that the one in Santa Barbara offered her the best package. That wasn’t far as far as distance, and it could be worse. I just knew that she wouldn’t be here with me, safe in my care. Caroline had someone always watching over her, whether it was her parents or me as her guardian. Now I was looking at her, talk about her future all on her own when it felt like my heart was breaking inside of my chest.
I hadn’t had that feeling since I lost my best friend and his wife.
I asked her about the job as she packed to go for the interview, trying to sound like a guardian would. In truth, I couldn’t stop thinking about how beautiful she looked when she came for me. I couldn’t ever forget how it was to be inside of her that first time, the first man in her life. I felt honored that her dad was the first man to love her and that I was the one she gave that precious gift to. I would never forget how it felt to hold her in my arms as I slept, and now my big bed felt empty and cold.
Caroline was moving closer to her future, though. That was what mattered. She folded clothes for the two nights that she would be there, talking about the company and perks that came with the job offer. Caroline mentioned how much she loved the beach and I wanted to scream at her how much I knew that. I was the one making love to her every night and morning with the sound of the waves coming through the open windows. I wanted to remind her how it felt as I fingered her in the water, feeling her tremble against me as a climax tore through her. I remembered all of that as she kept talking, and I clenched my fists.
Could she actually walk away from us?
I drove her to the airport the following morning, hearing her nervous babble the entire way. Caroline wouldn’t look at me. When I dropped her at the curb, she gave me a loose hug and walked inside of the terminal with barely a backward glance.
I thought that everything improved at the island between us once we gave into our desire. I wasn’t sure how it might work when we arrived home due to the nature of our relationship, and I didn’t think that she was either.
I also didn’t expect her to be looking through job offers so quickly, but why was I surprised? She was brilliant, and I was confident that her reputation preceded Caroline after the impressive work during her internships. She needed to see what she could get, something that seemed to be a weight on both of our shoulders.
I drove home from the airport alone, feeling a little lost. I wasn’t ready for Caroline to leave me, especially after the vacation. Everything about that was perfect, and what I wanted in my life, just with a woman I would have never considered before. She moved from a little girl that needed me to take care of her to a sexy, mature woman that got me going, even now sitting alone in this car.
Fuck. I drove out of the parking lot and home, going right to work in my home office as the silence settled in the house. The last eight years played through my mind, the good and the bad. I finally admitted that I loved Caroline inside of my head, deeply and in a way, that I’d never feel about anybody else.
I went to work early the following morning and stayed through the afternoon. Stella told me that I looked happy when I came back and told her that I had a great time. I wasn’t even as eager to be in the office, not like I thought I would be with the knowledge that Caroline was at home.
Today, she poked her head in when it was time to go home and raised an eyebrow at me. “What are you doing, boss?”
“Just finishing some stuff up,” I tried to sound casual despite the tapping of my feet under the desk. I was on edge and couldn’t get Caroline out of my head. I might not go home at all, knowing that the house was empty now.
“So, you went to a gorgeous place for the better part of a month just to come home to being a workaholic? Didn’t you learn anything?” She sounded mildly angry, and I glanced at her, seeing the concern in her eyes.
“It’s who I am, Stella.” I tapped on my keyboard to sound like I was working hard.
“You need a woman in your life, Perry,” she snapped before turning to leave as I dropped my hands on my desk.
I had a woman, and she was amazing. I made love to her every way that we could think of after I got to know her mind and soul. I was in love with her, and I sent her to find a life without me. I stared at my phone for a moment before picking it up. I dialed and leaned back in my chair, listening to the ringing until her voice mail picked up. “Hi, Caroline. I was just calling to see how things were going. Give me a call back,” I murmured before ending the call.