“Wilson, everything is going to be okay. Even if this letter is about us, I’ve already signed and sent in my resignation papers. They can’t do anything to me. So don’t worry about what’s going to happen to me. Wilson, listen, I won’t let anything happen to you, do you hear me? I love you.” I waited for her to answer.
“Yes, I love you too, Max,” she sobbed.
I heard Joanie in the background talking to Wilson, saying, “You have to settle down, Wilson. Do you hear me? Take a couple of deep breaths and settle down. You are all worked up over an assumption. You don’t know for sure what this letter is about. The best thing to do is get into the bathroom, run some cold water over your face. I’m not going to let you go to Dean McCallous’s office alone. I will be with you, okay?” Joanie’s voice was firm and reassuring. Thank God she’s there with her.
Suddenly the rustling of fabric and air sounded like Wilson gave the phone to Joanie. My heart was thrashing in my chest and the edges of my ears fucking hurt from pressing my phone so hard against it.
“Max, hello? You still there?”
“Yes, Joanie, I am,” I answered quickly.
“Listen, she’s really starting to freak out. I think I got her settled down. But, honestly, I have a bad feeling about this letter. I think it’s pretty serious. I don’t know how much more she can take. After everything you guys have been through this week...She just might lose it. How much longer before you are able to come out?” Joanie’s voice was very methodical and slow as she spoke.
“I don’t know, Joanie. I will do my best to get out there as soon as I can. A day, maybe two,” I answered.
“Do what you need to do. Just get out here as fast as you can,” Joanie said in a heavy whisper.
“Okay, thanks,” I answered.
Joanie didn’t respond before she hung up. I knew her attention was on Wilson. That was her number one concern, and mine too. My head was spinning, the victim of the ebb and flow of elation and desecration. One minute I was fulfilled, the next empty and lost. What am I going to do? I gotta stay calm…should I call Gary? No, he’s already handled my resignation from Wesley. What if he can help Wilson? No, no, no, no…I don’t need him to know about that. Maybe I just need to get there; damn I just gotta get to her. I snatched my phone and dialed. The phone rang several times before I heard her voice.
“Hel—”
“Mom, listen, I really need your help…”
Chapter Twenty-seven
~ Wilson ~
After splashing some water on my face, it wasn’t long before I started to feel a little more put together. Thank God for Joanie, she wouldn’t leave my side. I think the fact that I blew up on the plane about everything being so fucked up in my life may have caused her to be concerned with my stability and whether or not I was about to fall off the deep end, or so they say.
The letter I got from the Dean was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. It was the one thing that, if you were going to pile shit upon shit, was the last turd to hit the fan.
“J, I don’t think I can go in there with a straight face and not give away everything that I know. I can’t fake it this time,” I said, trying to keep the fear from resurfacing.
“Wilson, you can, and you must. I’ll be there with you, I promise. I will not let Dean McCallous or anyone else separate us.” Joanie picked up a brush and started brushing my hair smooth. “You’ve gotta go in there confident and put together. Don’t let them win anything. Now get your phone and call the Dean’s office. You can do it,” Joanie’s words rolled off her tongue like she’d given this type of pep talk a hundred times before.
I felt my heart thunder in my chest. My ears immediately clogged with the pressure of regret, and the back of my throat felt like the Mohave Desert.
Holy shit, Wilson, face your fears and call. Stop being a frickin’ baby and take care of your business. After all that I have been through this week, this is really nothing more than a hiccup in the breath of my life. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. I chanted that mantra in my head as I picked up my phone and read the phone number off the letter.
It didn’t take long for the phone to start ringing. With every subsequent ring, my heart beat faster and my mind tried to talk me into hanging up. It wasn’t until the fourth ring was abruptly cut short that I realized I was about to seal my fate with the dean of Wesley Academy.
“Good afternoon, this is Dean McCallous, with whom am I speaking?” Her voice was cold and calculated. I just held my cell phone to my mouth and continued to breathe. It was awkwardly silent until Joanie kicked me in the leg.