I turned all the way around and whatever strength I had left fell to my feet. My breath hitched, painful in my chest, and my eyes flooded with the apologies I ached to tell him. It was Max, standing at the bottom of the stairs. God, he was my forever. He was every breath I needed to take and every pulse that kept my blood pumping. He was the home I always wanted to have.
His eyes, bloodshot and narrow, matched the hue of his cheeks. The edges of his lips bent south and his jaw constricted as he looked up at me. It was the same look he gave me when I left him on his staircase. He swallowed hard as the tip of his tongue pushed and curled just enough to wet his lips, making it seem like every word that flashed in his head was poison to him. His head swayed to the side as if he was struggling to formulate his thoughts into words. His scent strolled toward me, teasing me, making me long to inhale him completely. My mouth watered. I swallowed hard, waiting for him to say something—anything. But he didn’t.
In that moment, it was just Max and me. Everyone else became nothing more than solid pieces of furniture holding space in the room, until I heard Joanie whispering, telling me to breathe.
“Max…” my voice cracked. “You’re h—ere…” I choked on my words before I took a step down.
“Yeah,” he whispered. The radiance from the huge crystal chandelier caught the flicker of the tears that began to cluster in his eyes.
I pushed my hands up to my cheeks, trying to dry them so the chill that kept rippling across my face wouldn’t be so harsh. God, I want to run to him. I crave to feel his touch. I just want him to hold me and tell me everything is going to be okay. But what if he doesn’t want me any more? What if he’s here to tell me that he’s over me? I looked over at Joanie, hoping she would convince me to keep walking down the stairs to Max.
“Go,” she prodded.
I took another step. My legs felt like rubber.
“I’m so sorry—” I struggled to say. He moved closer to the bottom of the stairs and held his hand up to stop me. I froze. As I looked at him his hair fell, blanketing his face. He looked down at the floor. The small space between us felt like a million miles. He shook his head. His shiny, black hair tumbled before he dragged his hands through it, clearing it from his face as he looked up at me.
“Did you mean what you said?” he asked, his beautiful lips shaping the words that poured from his heart. “What you told Cindy?”
There was a moment of complete silence that grew between us before I answered.
“Every word.” I took another step down.
He stepped up on the first step. “You are totally and completely in love with me?”
“Totally and completely,” I whispered. I felt my butterflies return to life as he took another step up.
“Well, you’re wrong,” he choked.
I gasped at his words. It felt like someone punched me in the gut. What is he saying? Is this some twisted payback for my huge mistake?
“I…don’t underst—” I said.
“You didn’t ruin your life,” he interrupted and took another step up.
“I really…hurt you,” I mumbled.
“I’m not going to lie, Wilson…you broke my heart.” He took another step up.
Now he was only a few steps away. I still towered over him; and yet, I felt as small as the eight-year-old girl who was left on the porch a decade ago. My heart clung to the back of my throat, my lips tingled with the fear of never kissing him ever again, and my hands were drenched with the anticipation of wanting to touch him one last time.
Chapter Two
~ Max ~
I was standing so close I could just reach out and grab her. Press her against my chest so hard she’d melt into me. When I saw her on the stairs I couldn’t keep my heart from thundering in my chest, my body surging with need for her; I had to stop myself from collapsing at her feet. I love her, and when I look at her, I see everything I’ve ever wanted—everything.
Wilson swayed forward and took another step. Her sweet aroma wafted down through me.
“I wish I could take back everything. God, I wish I never hurt you, Max,” she said, her eyes damp with regret.
Her blonde hair curved around her face with stray pieces clinging to her tear-drenched cheeks and the edges of her lips. I wanted to press my fingertips to her face and clear the pain away. But I didn’t. Instead I told her how I felt.
“You’re wrong about one thing. I could never stop…loving…you, Wilson.” I climbed the few remaining stairs that were between us.
I was so close to her I could feel her warmth roll across my skin. I watched her eyes well with tears and her chin quiver as she tried to stay strong.