Of course he heard, you idiot! her mind screamed.
She lifted the phone back up to her ear but was met with silence.
"Caleb?" she asked quietly, her heart drumming in her ears. She felt like she'd just swallowed a mouthful of sand. And even though her morning sickness had subsided for the past month, she was suddenly very, very queasy.
She heard a quick inhale over the line and then he said, "I gotta go."
And then he hung up.
He hung up.
The rest of the day she had a pit in her stomach full of dread. Every minute, she checked her phone, wondering if he'd tried to call her again or text her. Nothing. She debated calling him to explain, but what would she say? That she hadn't meant it? That she didn't love him?
She wasn't a liar. Those lies would taste like salt if they came off her tongue.
She couldn't focus, couldn't study for the rest of the afternoon, but she knew that if she took the day off and headed home, she'd be even more anxious there. Filled to the brim with it.
Maddie wondered if she should just play it off, pretend like it never happened and act like it was just one of those slips of the tongue.
Then she realized that she couldn't do that either, that she didn't even want to. If she did that, she would be even more of a coward than she already was for not saying those words long ago. No, this was her opportunity. She would face this head on, no matter how nervous it made her.
Truthfully, a part of her was relieved. Maybe now, those words would spark confrontation. Maybe Caleb would finally acknowledge what Maddie wanted him to acknowledge and they could move forward in their lives knowing exactly where the other stood.
The other part of her, however, wondered if she'd just ruined everything.
* * *
Caleb never gave her the chance to confront him. That night, he sent her a text saying that he had to work late, to not wait up for him. When he didn't come home at all-Maddie had tossed and turned all night in an empty bed, listening for his SUV to pull up in the driveway-she knew that she'd have to fight for him, even if it was against him.
For the next two days, he avoided her and every hour that he did made Maddie sick to her stomach. When he eventually came home late the next night, he didn't come into her room and slept in the guest bedroom. He was gone when she woke up, the sheets on his old bed rumpled. Already, she felt cracks squirming their way into her heart.
Please don't do this, Caleb, she silently pleaded.
Eventually, those nerves turned into determination. Why was she acting like saying I love you was a nail in her coffin? If she had been with anyone else, saying I love you for the first time should've been a happy event, not a mistake that she felt guilty over. She'd done nothing wrong. What she said to him was the truth, even though she hadn't exactly meant to say it.
And Caleb seemed to think that he could make it all go away if he ignored the problem for long enough. That was what he did with his past, but it was clear that that wound continued to fester. There was no doubt in Maddie's mind that if she let this go, if she let him get away with this too, then there would be no hope for them in the future.
This would eat away at her, slowly.
All her fears were finally coming true.
So, four days after she told him those three fated words, she found herself pulling up in the parking lot of Montgomery Restoration & Repair. She parked in her parking spot, the one she'd always parked in when she worked for Caleb all those months ago.
It was late-a little past eight at night-but the sky still held streaks of pink and orange. It was the second week of May, she was twenty-five weeks pregnant, and she was about to confront the man she loved. The calm and warmth of the evening did nothing to settle her nerves, but she wouldn't stand by and let him throw what they had away. He meant too much to her.
The garage was already closed up for the night. Brian had left over an hour ago since he dropped Peter off at their house on his way home. Maddie knew that Caleb was most likely working on the new restoration in the back garage, rather than in his office, so she followed the building around, her sandals silently padding her footsteps. She'd given up heels weeks ago since her ankles started swelling.
When she saw Caleb, her heart leapt in her throat. He was working, thankfully alone, sweat gleaming on his brow. That same intensity she'd come to associate with him was rolling off him in waves. He was in a bad mood, she could already tell, and he looked like he'd gotten next to no sleep. The man was running on fumes at this point and he still insisted on working himself to the bone.