"What do you think you would've studied if you'd gone to college?" she asked him, curious.
He shrugged, running a hand through his hair. "I've never really thought about it."
"Why not?"
"Because I've always known that I would take over the garage," he said. "And I'm lucky in the sense that I like doing restorations and working on cars and I get paid for it. I pay myself for it. The business side, all that paperwork, not so much, but it's a small price to pay in order to do something that I want to do." She smiled, liking his outlook. "Besides," he continued, "now I have you to teach me what I missed out on."
She swallowed hard, her stomach fluttering. He was teasing her, but it was the now I have you part that made her treacherous heart beat a little faster. It was an easy realization that she loved him. Natural, even. But Caleb was complicated. What she felt for him might never be mutual and she had to ask herself if she was willing to accept that.
No, she thought, sullenly. Eventually, it would eat away at her. But what else could she do? She'd now seen his passion first hand. What would it be like to be loved by a man like him?
"Where's Peter?" he asked.
Maddie looked back at her computer screen. "In his room. He said something about studying."
She thought his lips quirked up. "Good."
"Are you hungry?" she asked, knowing how much food Caleb could eat. Most nights when he came home, he was ravenous. Maddie had never gone food shopping as much as she had these past few months. Feeding Caleb and a teenage boy was no joke. "I wasn't sure when you'd be home so there are some leftovers in the fridge."
"I'm good for now. Brian and I ordered out a couple hours ago."
A silence fell, but it wasn't uncomfortable. It was … charged. Maddie tried to finish off her paragraph but she could see Caleb watching her out of the corner of her eye. She wondered if he would sleep with her again, even if they didn't have sex. Should she ask him? Invite him? If she did, what would she say? Maybe he liked having his own space …
Blowing a strand of hair that had escaped her bun out of her eyes, she glanced at him. Her nipples pebbled in her bra when she imagined crawling over to him and parting his jean-clad thighs before pulling his zipper down. She blushed and forced herself to look away.
"Am I making you nervous?" Maddie could hear the smirk in his voice. "Or is it something else?"
"It's something else," she murmured softly, her blood pounding in her veins.
If he was surprised by her answer, he didn't show it. "I've been thinking about last night. I've been distracted all day."
She took a sharp intake of breath, her eyes darting over to the couch. His dark eyes were hooded, a lock of hair brushing his forehead that she wanted to smooth back. Her lips parted to speak, but then closed. Finally, she said, "Me too."
"I need to know whether you liked what we did," his voice dropping an octave.
"Are you kidding?" she asked, disbelief replacing any semblance of a filter.
He shrugged, saying, "Some women don't like being tied up. It makes them feel like they have no power."
Isn't that what you want? she wanted to snap, suddenly beyond irritated at the mention of 'some women.' And jealous. So unbelievably jealous. How many women did he discover didn't like to be tied up?
"I didn't feel powerless, Caleb, in case you hadn't noticed," she finally bit out, hoping her voice didn't sound too tight.
But she knew she blew it when he hesitated. "Maddie … "
"What?"
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." She stared at her laptop screen like her life depended on it.
"Maddie."
She made a frustrated sound in the back of her throat. "I'm sorry that I don't want to know how many women you've been with, that's all."
"Ah," he said, furrowing his brow. Maddie hated the way he casually leaned back against the couch cushions. "There's no reason to be jealous, princess."
She didn't even bother denying his words, but the slightly amused lilt in his tone made her even madder. She typed a mixture of jumbled words on her laptop, just for something to do. Why was she feeling this way? She felt even worse than when she'd found that box of rope mixed in with her stuff after the move. It wasn't like they were married … it wasn't like they'd even talked about having a serious relationship.
No, I'm only pregnant with his child and living with him, she thought irritably. What the hell were they even doing?