A week later, I’m sitting next to Lars having dinner and annoying the shit out of him. “Are you excited to kiss me next week?”
“No.”
“Are you going to use your tongue?” I ask, tilting my head to the side.
He puts down his fork. “No. And don’t mention that again or else Dane will kick my ass when he gets back.”
“Fine but you’re at least going to touch my ass right?”
He gets up and leaves the table.
Gina shakes her head at me. “Leave the poor man alone.”
I giggle. “I can’t help myself.”
She laughs with me then looks down. “I’m worried about Dane. He didn’t even tell me he was leaving.”
I clear my throat. “Does he have to report to you or something?”
She smiles sadly. “No I don’t mean it like that. It’s just that…”
“What?”
She looks me in the eye. “Did Dane tell you how the two of us know each other?”
I shake my head.
She nods, like the expected it. “You haven’t left these walls in a long time Olivia. You don’t know what’s out there. There is no humanity left in our race. We’re all monsters.”
I look around. “There are good people here in the castle.”
She nods. “There are. Why do you think I stay here? This place is a blessing.”
“Then why do you… you know.”
“Sleep with men for whatever I want?”
I look down, my cheeks heating at her bluntness. “Yes.”
“A few reasons,” she says slowly. “Dane hates it too, but… it’s hard to explain. It’s all I know, really. And I’m not going to lie, I like the attention. I like sex, a lot. I guess I use it as a means of currency and an escape. When I’m sleeping with someone, I don’t think. My mind is blank. There’s no pain. There is also the fact that the women who choose to please the men get to use protection. We’re one of the few women in the castle that don’t have to have babies. I don’t want any children.”
I hadn’t heard any of this before. It would only make sense that they would have to be protected when sleeping with multiple men, but I never thought of it as a way to get out of helping to rebuild our population.
My eyes widening with her brutally honest admission, I mutter, “I don’t know what to say.”
She smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “You don’t have to say anything. It is what it is.”
“What is it like out there now?” I ask, waiting for her answer.
“Destroyed,” she replies casually. “Dead. Empty. There’s no sign of life, and when you do find it, you wish you hadn’t.”
Goose bumps appear on my arm from her explanation. “Yet Dane’s out there alone?”
“Dane could survive out there alone. Trust me, you don’t need to worry about him. He only got caught once because he trusted someone, and he won’t make that mistake again.”
My brows furrow. “What do you mean he got caught once?”
She shrugs her pale shoulders and keeps quiet.
My lips purse. It seems like everyone knows Dane’s history except me.
“He’s a good man,” she muses, tapping her nails on the table. “One of the best.”
“Do you want him?” I ask bluntly, needing to know the answer.
Her blue eyes flare. “If he wanted me, yes I’d be with him in a heartbeat. But he only sees me as a friend. As his responsibility. And now that you’re in the picture well…”
“Well what?”
“Well, I wouldn’t even try get in the way of that. I’m not that kind of woman.”
My lip quirks.
She starts giggling and soon I join her.
“Yes, I’m a prostitute with morals, so what?”
I start to laugh even harder.
Chapter Nine
Today was the day.
My wedding day.
My dad had got me a dress made. It obviously wasn’t like a traditional wedding dress, with lace or silk, but it was still beautiful. It was white and off the shoulder, made from cotton. Form-fitting, it clung to my every curve. Kim, the seamstress, stitched in an in built bra kind of thing so I didn’t need to wear one, which was good because I didn’t have one that could be concealed. My blonde hair was down my back in a thick fishtail braid, with white flowers interweaved. For the first time in my life, I actually felt like a princess.
If only I had my prince to share the day with.
I cringe at my own description of Dane.
“What’s that look for?” Gina asks, smoothing down the bottom of my dress.
I look down. “Do you think it’s stupid to have a wedding ceremony? I don’t know, it just seems so insignificant in the scheme of things.”