"Well, I was five-ten at thirteen," Logan said. "You wouldn't have scared me."
"Where were you when I needed you?" she joked, throwing her hands in the air in mock frustration.
"Well, I'm here now! Better late than never."
They laughed together.
"It wasn't until my early twenties that I started to love being tall. 'Til I started getting off on towering over people, embracing the power of it." She eyed him and added, "Come on. You're huge. You know that being tall can grant some unspoken power. That people treat you a bit differently."
"I never really thought about it," he said earnestly. "But I'm a guy. I didn't have to. I mean . . . yeah, I knew deep down people would think twice before messing with me just because I'm big. So . . . I guess I just proved your point after all."
Her voice lowered as she leaned across the table and murmured conspiratorially, "Now, I love wearing high heels. At the Holiday Ball, in my stilettos? I was six-foot-two." Her smile was radiant. "Even my two older brothers were an inch or two shorter than me. Pierce is six-two; he looked me in the eye. Heh."
"I bet you stood there like a goddamn Amazon warrior princess," Logan said reverently. "I bet you do every time."
"Goddamn right." Her smile brightened before she took another sip of water.
He could only stare at her. Respect, appreciation, lust, bemusement, and genuine like all flowed through him at the same time. She was something special. Other women, given what she'd had since birth, could very easily coast through life. But Tess was as down-to-earth as they came, with a good and still-open heart, despite her past heartaches. Tess Harrison was a rare woman. He could almost feel his crush on her deepen, which was both a rush and a curse.
"Your entrées are ready!" the waitress said with a smile as she brought a tray to their table. She cleared their appetizer plates, set down their steaks, and refilled their water glasses before leaving them again.
"That was a hell of a story," he said once they were alone again. "Thanks for sharing all that with me."
"Thanks for having my back in the lobby," she said. "You jumped right in! You were great."
"My pleasure." He readjusted his napkin over his lap, his mind buzzing with thoughts that all of a sudden came pouring out of his mouth. "I just have to say . . . you're a stunningly beautiful woman, from head to toe, inside and out. Jesus, Tess, your legs alone . . ." Heat rose in his face as he realized she was gazing intently, hanging on his words. The words he probably shouldn't have said out loud. He cleared his suddenly dry throat and tried to switch gears a bit.
"And, being a tall man myself? I like when I don't get a crick in my neck from talking to a woman and having to look doooown. So I love that you're tall." Noting her smile at that, he cut into his Black Angus. "I had no idea you'd ever been insecure, because you're one of the most grounded, self-assured women I've known in a long time. You carry yourself like a queen, and you should. You're insanely beautiful." Jesus, he was rambling now. He shoved another bite of steak into his mouth to have a reason to stop talking.
"I don't know what to say," she murmured. Her eyes were bright. "Those are some high-level compliments. I'm incredibly flattered. Thank you."
He only murmured back, "I meant every word."
"But for the record, I'm no queen. I'm just a lady from Long Island." Obviously touched, she smiled warmly. He basked in the pleased look on her face as she lifted her utensils to slice into her filet mignon. They ate quietly for a few minutes, letting the music and chatter around them fill the silence comfortably.
He was surprised at how at ease he was with her. How they didn't have awkward silences, spurred by the need to fill the gaps. Maybe it was because they were both pretty self-confident people, but maybe it was because they were really in sync. And when they did talk, he was finding it easier and easier. For a worldly, incredibly wealthy woman from a different world, Tess was approachable and open. He liked her more every time they spent time together.
"So, mister, I spilled my guts," she said when half their meals were gone. Her eyes sparkled with curiosity and a hint of mischief. "Your turn. Tell me some more about you."
He sighed inwardly. Had to know that would come, didn't he. "Really?"
"Really. Come onnnnnn, Carter." Her tone was light and playful. "Tell me something. I'd like to think you know you can, and that you know it'll stay with me."
"I do know that," he said quietly, only admitting that to himself as he said the words aloud. He took a gulp of water before saying, "Okay, yeah, reciprocation is fair play. I'll tell you some of mine too. But . . . Tess, some of it is ugly. That's just the truth."
"Logan . . ." Her voice sobered. "We've all had ugly. And no matter what happened before, now you're a strong, good man."
"Well . . . yeah, now I'd like to think I am, and I was when I was younger. But in between . . ." He winced. "There's a block of time there I'm not proud of. I fucked up big-time. Took me years to forgive myself. Some days, I still wrestle with the things I did. Or things that happened . . ."
Tess reached across the table and took his hand. Her skin felt warm and unbelievably soft. "Hey. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. Ever."
"I know that." He squeezed her hand and gazed at her. Then he took one more bite of his steak, savoring the taste before he said, "Well, how about to start with, I know a little something about betrayal too. I was married. To my college sweetheart. We were together for six years, married for the last three of them. I loved her more than anything in the world. And when I needed her the most, when I hit the lowest point of my entire life, she left me."
Chapter Ten
"I'm listening," Tess said gently as she laid down her utensils. "Go on, please."
"Okay." He set down his fork and knife too. "Warning you again though . . . some of it's ugly."
"I can handle ugly, Logan. You don't scare me."
"I bet very little scares you, actually."
"You'd be dead wrong. But go ahead."
He nodded, trying to figure out where to start. He took a long sip of water, feeling the cool relief of it slide down his suddenly tight throat. Then he said, "Rachel and I met in our junior year at Tulane, in a psych class. Love at first sight, immediate connection, the whole nine. Within two weeks, we were inseparable. I proposed the week after we graduated, and we got married the next spring."
"So young," Tess murmured. "How old were you both, twenty-three?"
"Barely." He picked up his fork again and started pushing around the brussels sprouts on his plate. "Her degree was in psychology, mine was in social work. We both wanted to help people. It seemed like a perfect match. Maybe at first, before I blew it sky-high, it was." He shrugged, not lifting his gaze from the plate. "We had an apartment in downtown New Orleans. She got a job in a medical center that catered to higher-end clientele, working there while she started her master's. Me, I was working down in the poorest areas of the city, also while getting my master's." He felt the wry twist of his lips. "But it pumped me up. The work, I mean. I was so idealistic, thought I was making a difference."
"I'm sure you were," Tess said. "Sounds like admirable work to me."
"I don't know. Maybe I did. I was young and naïve. Rach and I didn't have any money, but we had each other. She was going to eventually make lots of money, and I was going to change the world. Our future looked bright." He noticed how still Tess had grown. When she listened, she really listened.
"We both got our master's degrees, she started working with a private practice, and I was down in the ditches. Soup kitchens, homeless shelters, community centers, all of that. I felt like I had a purpose. I was crazy in love with my gorgeous, brilliant wife. Life was good for a while." He stopped, drumming his fingers on the table. He hadn't thought of the good times in a long time, and doing so now didn't bring any warm fuzzies . . . more like a hollow feeling. Like it'd all happened to someone else.
"So what happened?" Tess's voice brought him back to the present.