“My father doesn’t like anyone but him to have any control.”
Hmmm…maybe there was more there than I thought. Did he realize that the apple didn’t appear to fall far from the tree on the control issue? “Okay.” I dragged the word out, letting him know that I was waiting for more.
“The hotels aren’t my only business.” He paused and looked into my eyes. “Do you remember me telling you that I invested in a business to embarrass my father?”
I shook my head, waiting for the rest.
“I own a production company.” Jack ran his fingers through his hair and blew out a deep breath.
“Okay.” My brows furrowed in confusion.
“I own the largest porn film production company in the United States, Syd. My other business is making porn.”
He watched me intently, waiting for my reaction. My first thought was, okay, that isn’t so bad. But then memories of our past conversations came flooding back and I started to put together the pieces of the puzzle. He had 500 to 1,000 partners? He is amazing in bed? That women, with the over the top appearance at the conference, he said he brought her to piss off his father, was she an actress? I felt the bile in my stomach rise to my throat and it stung as I opened my mouth to speak. “Have you ever been in one of the films?” I held my breath waiting for the answer.
“No.” His response was immediate and unwavering.
“Have you been with any of the actresses?”
“Yes.”
My heart clenched. “Was the woman that you were with last weekend at the conference an actress?”
“Yes.”
“Is she your girlfriend? Were you with her after you got back from Hawaii?” The thought of him being with her after the week that we had shared made me sick. The tears filled my eyes and I looked away, fighting back their escape.
“No, I didn’t lie to you. I haven’t had a girlfriend since I was a teenager. And I wasn’t with her after I got back from Hawaii.”#p#分页标题#e#
He moved from the chair to sit next to me on the couch and I kept my head turned from him. I wanted to hide my emotions. He took my face in his hands and gently forced me to look at him. I saw pain in his eyes when the tears started flowing from down my cheeks.
He looked into my eyes as he spoke. “Syd, I’m not proud of who I am or things that I have done. And I know I don’t deserve you. You’re sweet and good and everything that I’m not. I tried to keep away so you wouldn’t get hurt, but I can’t help myself when it comes to you. I never wanted to be with a woman, the way I want to be with you. I want to get lay under the stars with you and talk for hours, and walk in the park holding your hand. You make me feel like I can be a better man when I’m around you. I’m terrified of the things you make me feel and I don’t know how to control it.”
I buried my head in his chest and he wrapped his arms around me while my tears turned into sobs. I wasn’t even sure why I was crying, I was just so wrought with emotions and everything he had shared that I couldn’t help but explode. Jack stroked my head until I slowly calmed in his arms. “You okay baby?” He whispered.
I nodded. “I just need to lay down for a bit, my head is pounding.”
Jack pulled off his shirt and laid himself back on the couch, pulling me to his warm chest and wrapping me in his arms. Neither of us was running away, it was a start.
I had no idea how long I had slept for, but my headache was gone when I woke up. And at least I didn’t think I was going to throw up anymore. I looked up and found Jack awake, watching me.
“Hey.” He spoke softly and stroked my hair.
“Did you sleep?” I stretched a bit and then snuggled closer into his chest.
“No.”
“Are you okay?”
He shook his head and gently laughed. “I lay out all my fucked up dirty laundry at your feet and you ask me if I’m okay? He emphasized the I’m. “And you wonder why I can’t keep away from you.” He kissed my forehead.
I sat up on the couch on my knees and straddled one leg on each side of him as he laid on his back. “If we are going to try this, there is no mixing business with pleasure for you. In fact, there is no pleasure for you with anyone but me.” I punctuated the sentence with my finger into his chest.
“Deal. But you know I don’t have much experience with relationships, so you need to have patience with me.”
“Patience, yes. Tolerance for cheating, no.” I smiled at him.
Jack moved and before I even knew what he was doing, he had switched our positions. I was on my back and he was kneeling on the couch above me, his legs straddled on either side of me.