Before You(38)

“I thought Cam handled most of the business side of the band,” Sara responded.

“He does, but this is big, so I think he wants to be there. He’s kind of a control freak when it comes to the band.” Bre walked to the back of the gallery, trying to escape the conversation about Jax. Since he came to her grandmother’s funeral, Sara never missed an opportunity to ask about him. At first, Bre thought Sara might be interested in him, but lately she suspected Sara still questioned whether she and Jax were more than friends despite what Bre told her after the funeral.

“I still think you should have asked them to sing a song or two at our opening. We would’ve drawn a huge crowd,” Michael said.

“We talked about this. The crowd wouldn’t be there for the art. They would be there for the music. We want the opening to be about the gallery and the artists,” Bre responded.

“It sounded like fun, though, and I wouldn’t mind seeing that band in action. They looked pretty hot in those YouTube videos,” Michael said, laughing.

“Be serious, Michael,” Bre scolded, trying to keep a serious face.

“Oh, come on, Bre. You know I was never really serious about that.”

“You weren’t?”

“Absolutely not. I wanted to see if you could get lover boy to do something for you for once. You’re so persuasive when it comes to the artists and advocating for the gallery, but you let him walk all over you. You don’t question him about anything. You don’t ask him for anything.”

“That’s not true.”

“Riiiight,” he said. “Did you ever ask him why he didn’t show up for the funeral? Did you ask why he hasn’t bothered to show up since then to support you?”

Bre shook her head in disagreement. “That’s not the point. You don’t understand our relationship.”

“You’re right. I don’t. I won’t even bother to ask whether you’ve questioned him about some of the rumors floating around town about him,” Michael said, his voice soft rather than condemning.

Bre looked at Sara, but Sara avoided making eye contact, shuffling through a stack of paintings.

“Sara, do you agree with him?”

Sara sighed and turned around. “Bre, it’s not my business.”

“That’s not an answer. Tell her what you said yesterday,” Michael said, his hands folded across his chest.

Sara pushed her blonde hair out of her eyes. “Bre, you’re my best friend, and as my best friend, I want you to be happy. If Cam makes you happy, then I’m okay with him. If he hurts you, that’s when I stop being okay with him.”

“That’s not an answer. What do you think?”

“When I met you freshman year, I was enchanted by your relationship. Cam treated you as if you walked on water. You two had so many inside jokes; it was the two of you against the world. I didn’t think anyone could come between you. I remember thinking, I wouldn’t settle for anything less in a relationship. But now…” Sara looked away, adjusting her wristwatch.

“But now, what?” Bre asked, her voice shaky. It was almost as if she were watching a train wreck. Michael effectively threw all her fears in her face. She couldn’t deny that she had similar doubts, but it hurt to realize that Michael and Sara thought the same thing, and if they did, so did other people. Her whole life as she knew it was crumbling in front of her and she couldn’t stop it. She needed Cam and his family, the façade of safety they provided. She had to make this work. Cam would be here tonight, and everything would be better by the end of the weekend.

“I don’t know,” Sara said, shoving her hands in the pockets of her jeans. “I still think Cam loves you, but I don’t think you’re a priority in his life right now, and I don’t think it’s entirely one-sided, either. He used to be your everything, but now you have other people to lean on, and that’s healthy. I think the question you should be thinking about is whether your relationship can grow with you. Only you can answer that question, and if the answer is no, you need to let go before you hurt each other.”

Bre swallowed hard, trying to force her tears back inside.

“Bre,” Michael said. “We’re not saying these things to hurt you. We’re worried about you.”

She wanted to yell at them, but she couldn’t. They were right. Cam would never abandon her, but she didn’t want to be an obligation and she knew Cam didn’t want to be an obligation, either. They both deserved more than that. “Thanks for your honesty, both of you,” Bre said, looking at Sara and Michael. “You don’t have to worry about me. I’m not ignoring or dismissing all the problems in our relationship. I see them, but I’m not going to throw away a long-term relationship because we’re having some problems. My mom walked away from every relationship when it became complicated or too much work. I don’t want to be like her. ”