Before You(29)

“I’ll go with you,” Jax offered.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ll go to the funeral with you and run interference.”

“You’d do that?” Cam asked, looking almost hopeful.

“Yes. I like Bre, and I don’t want her to be hurt. She needs her friends around her.”

“What about the meeting on Friday with the event planners for the Seattle music festival? Somebody needs to go to that,” Marc reminded them. “Alec and I don’t know anything about the business side of the band. One of you needs to be here.”

Cam and Jax studied each other, not saying anything.

“You go to the funeral and I’ll stay here,” Cam said. “I’ve already met with the planners, and they know me. You can tell Bre that I sent you in my place because I had some band business that I couldn’t reschedule, which is the truth.”

Jax ground his teeth together, trying to suppress the urge to agree to Cam’s scheme. “Cam, I don’t know. It’s not right.” He wanted to see Bre again. He missed her, but visiting her to protect Cam seemed deceptive. Every morning during the past week, he’d waited for her to show up at the beach to surf. He cursed himself for not asking for her cell number, but while they had met to surf several times, it wasn’t a formal date, so he didn’t think he could ask her for the number without making her uncomfortable. Since the incident in his room, anytime he came close to crossing the line of propriety, she retreated, so he went out of his way to make her comfortable, and that meant keeping the surfing date casual.

“No, think about it. It’s perfect. You two are friends, surfing buddies, and regardless of whether I’m there, Bre would want you there. It won’t make her suspicious of me, and it will keep that Mia at bay.” Cam smiled in a self-congratulatory manner.

“I could go. I wouldn’t mind getting Bre all alone, if you know what I mean,” Marc said, laughing at Cam’s expression.

“Shut up. You hardly know her,” Cam responded through gritted teeth. “No, Jax should go.”

“Fine. I’ll go, but I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for Bre. I know how complicated her relationship with her mom is.”

“She told you about her mom?” Cam asked, his eyebrows raised.

Jax hesitated as he walked to his microphone. “A little,” he said curtly. “Let’s start practice. Apparently, I have a trip to pack for.”





Chapter Twelve





Bre stood against the back wall of the memorial room of the mortuary, unable to catch her breath. The sickly sweet scent of the flower arrangements made the air feel thick and suffocating. The aisle appeared to grow longer with each moment that passed, and the thought of walking down it alone made her stomach lurch. She didn’t want to talk to anyone before Cam arrived. He’d told her he would meet her at the memorial service, and she didn’t think she would be able to confront the open casket in the front of the room unless he was with her.

As each person walked into the room she looked away, not wanting to make eye contact. No one minded. They clearly understood her body language, and they walked by without saying a word. Instead, they offered a soft pat on her shoulder, a quick embrace of her hand or a faint smile of pity.

Her mother still hadn’t responded to any of her texts or voicemails. She didn’t know whether she was happy or sad her mother was still missing in action. When it came to her mother, her feelings were complicated.

As a child, she’d adored her mother, constantly doing things that she thought would make her happy or make her mother love her, because when her mother focused her attention on her, the world seemed to come alive. Her mother had this special skill that sucked people into her orbit, and those people lucky enough to receive her attention went to great lengths to please her and make her happy. With a simple smile, she made you feel loved and special, and a look of disappointment brought you to your knees. However, just as quickly as her mother’s love was given, it was taken away, as if it never existed in the first place, and once it was gone, it rarely returned. If her mother had moved on, there was no way to change her mind.

Her mother didn’t value loyalty or promises. She believed in living in the moment at any cost. Bre remembered her mother telling her that she did what felt good in the moment because you don’t get second chances. While it was an appealing philosophy, she ended up hurting a lot of people in the process.

Looking at her watch, she realized that the memorial service was going to start in ten minutes. She arranged for the casket to be closed when it started. If she wanted to say goodbye, she only had a few minutes to do it. She closed her eyes and sucked in a deep breath, attempting to garner enough strength to make it through the day without falling apart. She couldn’t wait for Cam any longer. As she pushed her body away from the wall, she felt a hand on her shoulder.