And now, right when I felt like she’s finally healing this happens, and I honestly don’t what kind of lasting effect this is going to have on her. I can only hope that she’s become strong enough to realize that she has all the power in the world to become whole again and a man who’s willing to fight tooth and nail to help get her there.
“How long have you known?”
I feel Dee’s hand tighten on mine, silently letting me know that she’s listening, too.
“Since you carried her out of Heavy’s.”
My eyes shoot to Dee’s face. Even with her eyes still closed as if she’s sleeping peacefully, a lone tear sneaks out and slides down her face, telling me that she knows just how much Maddox has seen.
“You never said anything, not once. I don’t understand why you would be pissed if you watched it right along with them.” I keep my tone light, but inside, knowing that I am apparently as transparent to Maddox as it gets, and he still kept his mouth shut is a little hard to stomach.
“Wasn’t my place. And before you get pissed, I didn’t just sit back and ignore it. I watched, and if I thought for one second that you didn’t have it handled, I would’ve stepped in. Not going to lie. There was a time, when you both were attempting to make each other jealous, or pissed enough to stop trying, that I almost said something. Wouldn’t have done me a bit of good, though. She doesn’t need me sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong. It’s always been you. Not everyone would have the patience to stick around when that end result is a big unknown.”
Dee’s hand clenches in mine so tightly that it’s starting to hurt, even though her face still remains relaxed. I don’t even know where to begin to respond to all that. I can’t be pissed, because he’s right. I had it under control, but it would’ve been nice to know I wasn’t fighting alone.
“Patience wasn’t even a factor. When you love someone, you fight. You fight for them, and you fight with them. She needed me to fight for her then, and I’ll continue to do that until she can fight for herself again.” I feel him come up behind me and clasp my shoulder in his strong grip, offering me his strength.
“That right there is why I didn’t need to say anything.” He walks to the other side of the bed, dips his head down to her ear, and talks low enough that I can’t hear him. Her eyes snap open, and she looks right at me. Maddox leans up, kisses her on the forehead, and walks out the door.
“What did he just say?” I whisper, not breaking eye contact.
“He… he said it’s time for me and you to start fighting the same war and not different battles.”
I nod my head. He’s right. It’s always been Dee fighting me, fighting herself, and running from her fears. And I’ve been fighting the world for her while she does it.
It’s time. Time for her to let me in and let me help her heal.
Easier said than done with Dee, but when I look into her eyes, it isn’t the same force field barrier that she normally has in place that I see. No, I see right into her soul, and the love she keeps carefully hidden, for once, isn’t masked. That right there is all the hope I need.
“If you don’t stop treating me like a damn child, I’m going to lose it. I mean it, Beck. I want to go home. I want to sleep in my own bed.” He laughs, actually laughs in my face before turning back to the stove and flipping the pancake he’s working on.
Oh, the infuriating man. And damn him for making pancakes worthy of me kissing his feet.
It’s been two weeks. Two damn weeks since I’ve been released from the hospital, and he hasn’t left my side once. He’s becoming Betty freaking Crocker and Suzie Homemaker all rolled into one, too good looking for his own good man. He cooks my meals, does my laundry, and I bet if I asked, he’d wipe my ass for me.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m thankful for the assistance, but I haven’t left the house once since we’ve been back. The first week, I don’t think I could’ve left if I’d wanted to. My ribs screamed in pain whenever I moved, and my face would’ve given small children nightmares. I still look like I fought a semi and lost, but at least the bruises aren’t as ugly and vibrant as before, and the swelling has gone down enough that I look somewhat normal.
Now, I just want out. I want to go to my own house, sleep in my own bed, and put some space between us. Oh, who am I kidding? The main reason I want out is because he’s making me feel things that scare the shit out of me… making me believe that whatever I’ve been avoiding this whole time is possible.