“Give it a little more time,” he says, closing the file. “Keep working with the physical therapist and using the lotions I prescribed you. Other than that, you’re as healthy as can be. All you’re hard work has paid off.”
Not yet, I think to myself. Almost there.
Chapter Fifteen
SAVAGE
September 2012
Today marks three months exactly since my last nightmare. I told myself if I could go that long without one, then I could have her. I know it was shitty the way I left things, but I knew I needed to get my head straight before I tried to make things right. I owe her everything, and she deserves someone who’s able to give her that. I didn’t want to half-ass it with all we’ve been through already.
I hop on my motorcycle and head to Julie’s parents’ house. I heard from Mac that Julie’s been staying with them this semester to save money at school, and it breaks my heart. We should have been married by now, but my fucked-up head kept that from happening. I feel the wind blow on my face as I near the house, and I make a silent vow to her and to us that I’ll make it right.
I won her over once, and I can do it again. I have to. I’ve been to every shrink I could get my hands on, and talked until my lips went numb. I’ve been through so many doctors and physical therapists I could probably get a medical degree by now. I’ve done all I can do to myself to become the healthiest man I can be for her, and I’m ready to pick up where we left off. I just pray she’ll forgive me.
My dick still doesn’t work, but most of my doctors reassure me that one day it might. I hate that I can’t give that to Julie, but I’ll give her everything I can to make sure she’s satisfied. I don’t care if I have to eat her pussy thirty-two times a day, she’ll never want for anything sexually. My love for her goes beyond the physical, and I need her. I don’t care how it has to be. I have to have her.
I drive around the bend, and see her parents in the front yard doing some gardening. I pull up in the driveway and get off my chopper to go see if she’s home. I’m nervous about what her parents are going to say to me, but whatever it is, I’ll take it. She’s worth it all and then some. I’ll take any licking I have coming my way.
Her mom approaches me, with her dad close on her heels. She’s a tiny little thing just like Julie, and her white blonde hair hangs in ringlets too. They’re nearly identical in looks. And attitude. Julie’s dad is tall and well-built for an older guy. What I find most intimidating about him are his eyes. Julie’s eyes are the same, and I know they have the ability to see right through me.
I stand there and watch them walk towards me, bracing for the anger and the hatred. When her mom’s within arm’s reach, I tense, but then suddenly I’m engulfed in a hug. It’s warm and wonderful, and I can’t help but hug her back, reveling in the comfort and affection.
“She’s in the kitchen,” she whispers into my ear, and she turns to go back to her flowers without another word.
Julie’s dad gives me a firm handshake and solid eye contact, telling me without words not to fuck this up. I nod back at him, and that’s all the confirmation he needs. In a matter of seconds they’ve gone back to their work, and given me their blessing to make things right with my girl.
I feel a bounce in my step as I go through the front door and make my way to the kitchen. It’s one more obstacle down to getting Julie back in my life.
I was here quite a few times before I shipped out, her parents always welcoming me to their home. Despite our age difference, and how fast we moved, they seemed to see something in us that reminded them of their relationship.
I round the corner and see her sitting at the table, books and papers spread out all around her. At the first sight of her beauty, my knees go weak, and I fall on them in the middle of the kitchen. It’s where I need to be anyway, groveling on them for her.
“Abe!”
Julie says my name as an expletive and an accusation. She jumps up from her seat and glares at me. It’s safe to say she isn’t happy to see me.
“What the fuck are you doing here? Get out.” She spits the words at me, but I can see her eyes. They can’t lie to me. I see the sadness and the need there, because they match my own.
I’m on my knees, and I spread my arms wide, baring my soul to her. Showing her physically how exposed I am, and that I’m willing to sacrifice everything for her.
“Julie.”
She starts to speak but I don’t let her.
“I never meant to hurt you, and I’m sorry I pushed you away. You were, and you are, the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I was so afraid. I was scared that you wouldn’t love me if I wasn’t whole, so I pushed first. I was having such a hard time figuring out what happened, and trying to keep you safe, that I lost my mind a little. I know I’m all scarred-up now, and I’m not the same on the inside either, but one thing has never changed. My love for you hasn’t gone away, and I know now that I’m okay. I got help and I got better, and I’m here, begging you to take me back.”