Beautiful Surrender(29)

“You ran. It took me a while to come to terms with it but when I realized what had happened, I felt horrible. Like I was abandoned. Do you understand how that feels?”

“I’m sorry you’ve gone through a rough patch.”

“I fell apart, Kristen. You know my job as an investment banker? I got fired because I stopped showing up. Then I couldn’t get another job. Nobody would hire me. I was too depressed to even care. It wasn’t long before I stopped trying. Know what I do now? Or at least what I did until a month ago.”

“What?”

“I worked at a McDonalds. That’s what it came to after nearly two years of taking odd jobs since you left me. I kept getting fired. My coworkers would always make fun of me. They’d laugh at me. ‘Look at the Harvard boy. He’s no better than us.’ It made me so angry. I was just trying to do my job like everyone else but they thought I believed I was better than them. Which wasn’t true! It made me lose my temper.”

“That sounds terrible.” As much as I hated Marty for hurting me, it didn’t make me feel good to hear about how rough his life had been the past two years.

“Yeah, I don’t understand why people have to be such shitheads. I try so hard to be a good person but people don’t see that. They look at me like I’m rotten when it’s them. They’re the bad ones. Judging me. Accusing me of things that aren’t true. I know I make mistakes but really I’m a good person. You know that, right? Can you ever forgive me for what I did to you?”

“I don’t know, Marty. You hurt me very badly.”

“I feel awful about it all. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t regret what I did to you.”

“Okay,” I said. “Is that what this is all about? You just want my forgiveness?”

“That’s part of it. You mean so much to me. The other part is that I love you, Kristen. I’ve said it to you before and I meant it. I’ll never stop loving you. I need to know how you feel. Do you still have feelings for me?”

“How can you ask me that when you just broke into my apartment with a gun?”

“I told you, I had no choice. It’s that fucker’s fault. Vincent.” He turned to Vincent. “I know who you are. Billionaire, playboy, CEO of Sandworks—Vincent Sorenson.” Marty returned his attention to me. “Can’t you see he’s just using you? He’s going to break your heart. He doesn’t love you like I do.”

“You don’t know anything about me,” Vincent growled. “I’d never hurt Kristen like you did. You’re a monster.”

“Look at my face,” Marty said to me. He unwrapped his bandages, revealing black and blue swollen skin. “You know who did this? Tell me who’s the real monster.”

I shook my head. “You’re upset, Marty. Even so, you’ve never gone this far before. Have you been taking your meds or seeing the psychiatrist?”

“I want to but I can’t afford those things. They’re too expensive.”

“Can’t your family help you?”

“Not really. You already know I dropped out of law school. That pissed my dad off. When I refused to return to law school, he disowned me. My mom tried to talk some sense into him, but she ended up killing herself last month by taking too many sleeping pills.”

My stomach dropped. His mom had been a person with serious issues, but any suicide was a sad situation. “Oh my god.”

“Yeah.” He paused, his eyes beginning to water. He turned his head, blinked away tears then returned his gaze to me. “It made me realize I need you, Kristen. My life’s a mess without you. You’re my rock. I can’t keep going on without knowing if my only chance at happiness is still out there for me. Can’t you see how much I care about you?”

I began to play with my necklace as if I’d just discovered I was wearing it. “This isn’t right, Marty.”

“Let me see your hand.”

The image of Marty twisting my finger flashed through my mind. “W-What are you going to do?” I dropped my hand back down and began to hug my knees again instinctively.

He shifted his seat closer to me, backing me against the armrest of the couch. Leaning over, he reached for my hand and gently pulled my arm away my knees. He brought my pinky up to his lips and kissed it tenderly. I felt like I was going to throw up.

Vincent struggled against his cuffs. “Good lord man, what are you doing? Kristen, he’s manipulating you. You have nothing to feel guilty about. He’s the one who should feel guilty.”

“Stay out of this,” Marty spat.