Beautiful Outlaw

Ten Years Later


Asking for Help

Laura

I fidget in my seat as my brother walks into the restaurant, questioning the decision to involve him in my problems once again. Jeremy was once my best friend, the person I loved the most in the world. After nearly ten years of living with Marcus, my brother is a virtual stranger to me now, someone that I don’t even know. More importantly, he doesn’t know me at all. At least, he doesn’t know my secrets.

His eyes scan the dining room, before finally landing on me. The coldness, near repulsion, I see in them sends a shiver down my spine. It’s hard to believe that I was once precious to him. He may not hate me, but I’m sure any love he once felt for me is long gone. I can’t blame him, but if he only knew the truth he would understand. At least, I think he would.

He strides toward me; his cold eyes never leaving mine. As soon as he reaches the table, he slides into the chair across from mine. He looks at me up and down, taking in my six-hundred dollar suit, overly made-up face, and the three carat diamond ring that my husband forces me to wear. Disgust replaces the hatred in his eyes, as he leans back in his chair.

“What do you want, Laura?” His voice is harsh and distant, causing me to flinch. Just the way he says my name causes pain to shoot through my heart. It’s nothing like the voice of the brother I remember from my childhood.

“I…” I start, but my voice falters before I can get the words out. Fear of what will happen when I finally tell him the truth has my resolve crumbling. What if he doesn’t believe me? Or worse, what if I’ve waited too long and he doesn’t care anymore.

“Just say it.” He barks out, growing impatient.

I nervously bite into my bottom lip, trying to find the words I need to say. No matter how many times I have been through this conversation in my head, nothing sounds right. He’s going to think I’m a lunatic. He’s probably going to think what I am going to tell him is just a crazy story I’ve made up. Even though I’ve been living it for the last ten years of my life, I even think it’s crazy.

“Damn it, I don’t have time for this shit. You said you needed to talk, so I’m here. If you have nothing to say, I’m heading back to work.”

I look at dark blue shirt stretched across his chest, with the shiny badge pinned proudly on it, and feel a wave a pride wash through me. I’m honored to call this man my brother, even if he doesn’t feel the same way.

I stare into his cold eyes and blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. “How’s work?”

I see anger flash across his face and drop my eyes to my lap. I regret asking the question, as soon as it leaves my mouth. I’m not sure what would have been a good way to start this conversation with him, but that surely wasn’t it. After years of nothing more than a polite hello or goodbye, I doubt anything I said would have been right.

He shakes his head, before placing his hand flat against the table top and leaning towards me. “You don’t give a shit about my life, so don’t pretend you do. Just tell me what you want, so I can get the hell out of here.”

He’s growing angrier by the minute, and I know I have to ask him now or I may never get the chance again. Throwing caution to the wind, I look into his eyes. “I need your help.”

“What?” He asks, sounding shocked. “You’ve got to be kidding me. You haven’t talked to me since God knows when, and you’re asking for my help?”

“Jeremy.” I whisper out, letting his name leave my lips for the first time in years. “Please, just listen to me.”

Marcus forbade me from speaking of my brother the day Jeremy told him to go to hell. It didn’t matter that my husband had just offended my father, calling him a charity case. The fact my dad has never missed a day of work in his life, other than for my mom’s sake, didn’t factor into Marcus’ opinion. It only mattered that my parents were losing their home, because of my mother’s extensive medical bills, and he was the one forced to bail them out or face the embarrassment of his in-law’s home being taken by the bank.

“You haven’t listened to me in years. Why should I listen to you now?”

“I need you.” I plead, hoping he can hear the sincerity in my voice.

“You never need anyone but your husband. I’m sure whatever it is Marcus can help you.” He says as he pushes up from his chair.

Before he can step away from the table, I reach for his hand. Knowing this is my last chance, I blurt out the truth. “I need your help to get away from Marcus.”

He stops mid-stride and turns to look down at me. “What did you say?”