"Sure. I'll see you at rehearsal," I said, even though I wasn't sure I quite believed myself. "Go."
Watching the two women in my life walk away into the night was probably one of the hardest things I had ever done. With a deep breath, I turned back to the school, which was powered down for the night. I went back down the hallway to face the darkness on my own. After all, this was my battle.#p#分页标题#e#
I ducked into my office, locking the door and opening a bottle of gin. It was going to be a long night and I might as well have some company.
CHAPTER 19: AMY
Porsche pulled me along the sidewalk to the hotel at an alarming rate, chattering away as if we had just left a party.
"It'll be ok, Amy, really, you'll see. It'll help for when you graduate. You can't live at the school forever."
I nodded, trying to make sense of what she was saying.
"Do you live in a hotel in Russia?"
"Ballet dormitories, fully furnished," she replied, with a shrug. "And fully serviced. Very luxurious."
"Right," I said, looking over my shoulder as the school got smaller and smaller. “Do you think Liam will be alright?"
"He's just over-reacting," she said. "Really, Selene is just annoying. She doesn't usually fight. Now, do you have everything?"
"I forgot my AZT," I said, suddenly, patting my pockets. I turned, but Porsche pulled me back.
"I have some. Wow, bonding," she said. "You can borrow. Now, let's go."
"Don't you need it?" I asked, and Porsche winced, shaking her head.
"Nope. Let's go."
The hotel the performers were staying at was lovely – far better than anything I had ever stayed at with my father on our rare family vacations. Porsche checked me in, and led me towards the elevator, all without letting go on my hand.
"They probably think we're lovers, checking in for a night of passion," I joked, trying to keep the mood light. She eyed me. "Wouldn't be the first time."
"Oh." I said and then stopped, realizing what she was telling me. "OH."
"Is that a problem?" she asked, and I shook my head.
"No, of course not. I just thought ... you ... and men ... men stare at you all the time."
"Either works for me," she said, leading me out of the elevator. "Although it’s not a well known fact."
"I won't tell anyone! Wow, Porsche, you're the most interesting person I know," I blurted out as we reached my room. She laughed.
"You're dating a vampire," she pointed out.
"Dated. Past tense," I countered as I stepped into the room.
"You sure about that?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. "Good night, Amy. Sleep well."
"You're not staying?" I asked, shocked. She shook her head.
"Double duty. Back to school to deal with your undead headmaster. Slash Boyfriend. Slash Vampire." She handed over her pill bottle and then, nodding, she closed the door. I was alone in the room, with only distant voices coming from another room to keep me company.
I wasn't going to cry, not this time. Porsche was right. This would be good for me, and good for Liam and me to not be so close together. I had to leave school sometime, and what better time to do it than during my first professional production?
I got ready for bed, popping the pills she had given me. Out of curiosity, I looked at the label.
“Porsche Caroline De Ritter" it said. So Porsche was her real name and not just a cheesy dance name. The dosage was the same as mine. We could practically be pill buddies. What surprised me was the date.
Prescribed: September 2012.
Refills: 0.
This was only a 3 month supply. So either she had switched doctors, prescriptions...or the more likely option: she was done. Porsche was no longer in HIV positive status. She was in full blown AIDS and they weren't working anymore.
I sat down, staring at the bottle. Knowing that meant so many things to me. She had immortality, I did not. Her transformation would change our status.
To my surprise, tears sprung to my eyes. Vampire or not, the first real friend I made here, who understood, was going to die a lot sooner than I was. And I'd be alone. Alive and alone.
Hot tears poured down my face. I didn't have any memories of my mother, only feelings of warmth and comfort and safety. I had seen pictures and they were like looking into a crystal ball and seeing my future. No matter whether it was 10, 20, or 30 years down the line, it was coming.
I curled under the blankets, my tears staining the pillow. My head began to pound, and I closed my eyes. This was a nightmare; all of this was a nightmare that I never wanted to wake up from.
But it was reality, and it was mine.
I waited for sleep to take me as a million thoughts ran through my head. But it never came. I drifted into a doze around dawn, although I was wide awake when the alarm went off.