“I’m fine, Charlie. Just a little tired,” I lied. “I stayed up working on my thesis, and I have a bit of a headache. But I’m fine. I’m sorry about earlier.”
“I could give two shits about the glasses as long as you’re okay.” He looked me in the eyes. “You’re sure? I can stay and you could take off.”
I smiled. “I’m good. But thank you.”
Wednesday night was the slowest night of the week anyway. It was just Al and me tonight, an old retired cop friend of Charlie’s who worked the bar a few nights a week. I was glad Ava wasn’t working so I wouldn’t be grilled about my mood. All evening, my emotions had jumped back and forth between feeling bad that I’d pried into Caine’s life and feeling pissed that he’d been such an asshole when I mentioned his past.
There were only a few customers in the small, open dining area that adjoined the bar, which left me ample time to overanalyze what had transpired between me and Caine this afternoon. Clearly I’d ventured into territory where I wasn’t welcome, but it didn’t feel like it was because of our pseudo employee-employer relationship. He led the way poking into my personal life, so it wasn’t as if having a personal-ish relationship was out of bounds for him. This felt more like I’d touched a nerve than pushed the boundaries too far. He’d said, “Keep out of my personal life,” yet for reasons that didn’t make any sense, I was certain he meant Keep out of this area of my personal life.
But that wasn’t what was bugging me. Don’t get me wrong, I felt bad that I’d upset him. I would have felt bad for intruding on anyone’s life in an area where they didn’t want a flashlight shined. What was confusing was the degree to which it bothered me. I was attracted to Caine on a physical level, that I couldn’t deny—who wouldn’t be? But him being so curt and upset made me realize my attraction to him was more than physical. I was crushing on my damn professor. Since that first day after class, I’d been drawn to him on another level.
Just before nine, I came out of the ladies’ room and checked on my one remaining couple who lingered at their table having coffee. Out of my peripheral vision, I spotted someone who had seated himself at one of the pub tables and went over to make sure he knew the kitchen was already closed for the day. I was shocked to find it was Caine sitting alone at the table.
“Professor? What are you doing here?”
His eyes answered for him. There was trouble lurking in the background. “Can you sit for a few minutes?”
“Ummm…sure. Let me just drop off the bill at my last table, and I’ll let Al know they’ll bring it up to him when they’re ready.”
Caine nodded. “Thank you.”
When I returned, there was already a Diet Coke on my side of the table and a beer in front of Caine. Untying my apron, I sat down and waited for him to speak.
“I want to apologize for this afternoon,” he said.
“I should be the one to apologize. I shouldn’t have been poking around in your personal life.”
“That’s true.” He smiled. “But I was wrong for the way I reacted.”
I shook my head. “If there’s anyone who should know there are things in people’s pasts they might not want brought up, it’s me.”
Caine nodded. He rubbed one finger around the top of his beer bottle. “I listened to some Johnny Cash tonight.”
“You did?”
He held my eyes. “I think we both have parts of our lives we’d rather not shake for fear of waking them up.”#p#分页标题#e#
That described perfectly the way I felt about my past. For the most part, I’d moved on and didn’t think about it on a daily basis. But it was always with me, and I worked hard to keep it locked away.
“Yes. I’m sorry. I really wasn’t thinking. I’m sure there’s a reason you don’t mention your history in your classes.”
Caine drank his beer, watching me over the rim. When he set it down, he asked, “How did you find out?”
I didn’t want to get anyone in trouble. “A friend of a friend.”
He nodded.
I thought it was best to come clean all the way. I took a deep breath before confessing. “And I might have Googled you. Well, not you. Adam’s other son.”
Caine shook his head, but there was a sad smile on his face. “I needed a haircut.”
“You were in style. I liked it. You had the whole sexy-bad-boy thing going on.”
“I’ll keep that in mind next time I go to the barber.”
“Can I just ask you one thing?”