“Serena was really only interested in me physically. She fell in love with the idea of me. Believe me, anything about me she didn’t like, she set out to change. Whether it was my hair, my clothes, or my personality. She just wanted me to be the other half of her power couple. I broke up with her because I was tired of having her try to change me into who she wanted me to be. All of my friends see me as they want to, and expect me to act that way. We never even talk about anything deeper than who’s getting with who, or how the stupid football team is doing,” he laughed dejectedly, without humor.
“But...but...,” Bri faltered, trying to wrap her mind around what he was saying. As things finally began to make sense, she felt incredibly sad and sorry for what a lonely, empty life he had lived.
Cole reached out hesitantly and took her hand.
“That’s why you’ve ruined me, Ambria. With you I have finally been able to be myself. The person I want to be. And I’m not giving that up without a fight.” He looked at her meaningfully.
Bri stared deep into his eyes, and realized that she believed him. For better or worse, hopefully not worse, she believed that the Cole she knew and cared for was not some carefully constructed persona, but the man who lay hidden underneath all the facades.
“Okay,” she replied softly. She smiled at the relieved look that came over his face.
“Okay? Does that mean you believe me?” The hope in his eyes was almost irresistible.
“Yes, I believe you.”
Cole jumped out of his chair and pulled her into his arms.
“Oh, thank god,” he mumbled in her hair. “I didn’t think I’d ever be able to convince you.”
Bri felt herself soften. She tentatively returned his embrace, not quite sure what this meant for the two of them. They held each other for a few moments before Cole pulled back to look at her.
“Bri, do you... do you think that maybe we could give us another try?” His face appeared calm, but she could see the fear and trepidation in his eyes. She didn’t want to hurt him, but she knew that she wasn’t quite ready for that yet. She pulled out of his arms, her body protesting the whole way.
“Cole,” she began sadly. “I can’t. I’m sorry, but I’m just not sure it’s a good idea.”
“Bri, I promise you, you have nothing to worry about,” he replied ardently.
“I have nothing to worry about?” she asked softly. “Cole, other than Serena, what is the longest you’ve dated a girl?” She looked up at him.
“Um, three weeks,” he answered reluctantly, running a hand through his hair. “Maybe four.”
Bri nodded. “And I have nothing to worry about? We both have so little experience in actual relationships. I’d hate for us to screw this up because we rushed into something we both weren’t ready for. Do you understand?” she pleaded.
“Yes, I understand,” he exhaled. “You need time, I get it. I really don’t blame you, with everything I’ve put you through. I can wait. I’ll wait for you forever, Bri.” He said, completely serious.
“You can wait?” She was equal parts hopeful and terrified.
“I can be very patient when I want to be,” he smiled. “Though, I’d be exceedingly grateful if you didn’t make me wait too long.”
“Okay, I’ll do my best,” she smiled back.
“Now that I’ve spilled my soul,” Cole smiled lightly as he lifted Bri’s hair from the side of her neck. “Will you please tell me how you got this?” He traced her lily tattoo with his thumb before looking in her eyes.
She smiled sadly at him.
“Not tonight. We still have a lot of work to do.”
Cole was obviously disappointed, but he nodded as he let her auburn hair slip through his fingers and back into place.
“Another time, then,”
Chapter 14
The Tuesday before Thanksgiving, Cole suggested they meet at a local coffee shop to study. And since school was out for the rest of the week, they didn’t do much studying.
“So, when does Psycho get in?” Cole asked. They were sitting in a couple of armchairs towards the back where it was quiet.
“Ugh, tomorrow night,” Bri groaned. “Luckily she’s only here for four days this time. I don’t think I could handle anything longer. So, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?” She took a sip of her peppermint hot chocolate.
“We’re heading over to my dad’s friend’s house. We kind of have this tradition of spending Thanksgiving over there.”
“Oh, good. For a minute there I was picturing you and your dad eating frozen dinners in front of the TV or something,”