Beautiful Burn(19)

“God, I hate you,” she panted between moans. “I fucking hate you,” she grit through her teeth but continued to ride my hand while I brought her closer to release. “Is this what you want? Do you like knowing I'm wet just thinking about you? That listening to your voice in class gets me so turned on I can't focus on anything but what it would feel like to have you inside of me? I hate you for making me want you. I hate you for making me want what I can't have! What you won't give!” She screamed and sobbed and rode my hand until I pressed my fingers deeper, swirled quicker, and she came in earth shattering waves around my fingers. I groaned as I pumped, the sensations nearly too much to bear, before her body went lax, her muscles limp around me. Soft lips met the skin beneath my ear and she sucked, slow and steady, not too hard.

“Jesus,” I murmured as she came down from her euphoric release. My head fell to her neck and I sucked in long, fortifying breaths as I tried to control my raging hard on. I wanted her, but I didn't want her here. Not the first time.

Finally, when I'd regained some small semblance of control, I flicked my tongue out and tasted the sweet skin at the curve of her neck. I loved the taste of me on her. I loved working her to a sweat and getting her all wild and messy.

“Can you let me down?” she asked, emotionless. My heart shuddered to a thunderous halt in my chest.

“Auburn.” I couldn’t keep the emotion from my voice. I prayed I wouldn't have to watch her walk away from me, again. I heard fabric rustling and knew she was trying to straighten her clothes and I shot a hand out to stop her before she opened the door.

“Stop, Reed. This doesn’t make it better,” she whispered with near rage. “This has gotten so complicated, I’m just not sure it’s worth it anymore.” Her voice wavered and my hand tightened on her waist before I wrapped an arm around her shoulders and nuzzled against her neck.

“I know it’s fucked up, but I can’t stand being away from you.”

“That’s not fair. What you're asking of me isn’t fair!” she screamed, her anger in direct contrast to my submission. “All this sneaking around makes me feel like your dirty little secret.” She nearly whimpered the last word.

“I know. You have to understand, I'm married. Her parents are well-known and even more well-respected in this town.”

The quiet resonated in the darkened space separating us. “Then why did you take off your wedding ring?” Her hollow words hung thick in the air. I worked the empty space on my ring finger where the platinum band once resided.

“It didn't feel right.” I finally answered her.

“I'm not sure this does anymore either.” Her words were so quiet, so final, it chilled my heart.

“I can’t lose you, you’re the only person in my life I can actually be myself around. Even if everything else goes away,” I referred to the sexual tension we'd been flirting with up until now, “I need your friendship.”

“Reed,” she murmured. I hoped she was cracking. Prayed I’d gotten to her. I couldn't explain Auburn's hold over me, but she'd somehow managed to breathe life into my wounded heart.

“Please,” I whispered as I clasped a hand around her neck and pulled her to me. “Please, Auburn,” I breathed against her lips.

I felt her body melt into mine when her fingertips dusted along the sensitive skin of my neck, hands locking behind me as she pressed her forehead to my lips. We stood holding each other, our breaths the only sound interrupting the complete stillness. “We should get back to class,” she said after a few long moments. I could tell she was still wary, but I would do better. I had to do better. The possibility of losing her had become a risk I couldn’t take.

“Maybe I should ditch the rest of class.” She pulled away from my embrace. “I could look thoroughly fucked and not even know it.” I heard the smile in her voice and my heart stuttered back to life.

“Too suspicious. Here.” I pulled the phone from my pocket and lit up the flashlight. “Watch your eyes.” I warned before I flashed the light at her face. I smoothed a smudge of her eye makeup from one lash line. “Beautiful as ever.” I placed a kiss on her nose.

She half smiled as she ran her fingers through her loose hair. “I'm sorry I over-reacted.” She stepped into my arms the next moment and I instinctively wrapped her in my embrace.

I rested my forehead on her shoulder and breathed a content sigh. “I think I nearly went crazy without you the last week. People talk about soul mates or kindred spirits, I don't know if I believe in any of that, but it felt like being burned from the inside out when you ignored me. I burn for you, Auburn. You’re my beautiful burn.” I finished, unsure if she was even ready for me to unload all the baggage I carried.