Beast(18)

The silence is even worse. There is nothing else to focus on.

Until there is.

The doorbell.

It shocks me back to life. The doorbell means someone else is here. And  I'm out in the open. They only have to walk down the hall, and then  Javi's darkness will be exposed.

Hope blooms inside of me. This could be it. This could be my chance. I  crane my neck to try to see what's happening, but I can't. I'm too far  away from the hallway.

A foreign voice echoes down the hall. I can't let this opportunity pass  me by. Whatever it takes, I will do it. My screams come out muffled  around the ball gag, so I shake my head back and forth until I'm able to  spit it out.

"Help! Down here. Please, help me!"

There are footsteps. Two pairs. They are drawing closer. My heart is beating so fast it feels like it's going to explode.

This is it. My saving grace. Someone has come for me. Someone is here, and this nightmare is over.

Except when I see the man's face, I realize that it isn't. Because he  takes one look at me, and he smiles before casually taking a bite of the  apple in his hand.                       
       
           



       

"So this is her, huh?" he mumbles around the half-chewed fruit.

"Yes," Javi answers.

The stranger nods in approval, his eyes roaming over my naked body.

"Very nice. So when do I get to have a go?"

Javi will not look at me now, and I fear the worst.

"Please, no! No, Javi. You can't do this!"

A heart-wrenching sob explodes from my chest. I know Javi is cold. I  know he can be cruel. But not like this. He can't do this to me.

He comes to the table and pets my cheek. The sickest part is that I lean  into him. I cling to his warmth and the safe haven he provides while I  try to appeal to any humanity left inside of him.

"I don't want him," I say. "I only want you. Please, Javi."

He glances back at the stranger and smiles. The stranger continues to eat his apple, unfazed.

I hope that Javi will ask him to leave. The person that I thought had  come to save me is now scarier than the monster standing right before  me.

"You want to please me, my sweet?" Javi asks.

"Yes. Anything you want. Please."

He unzips his pants. And the stranger steps closer. Watching as Javi  shoves his cock into my mouth. My eyes remain glued to the intruder.

Frozen.

Unsure.

Javi slaps my breast to get my attention. I close my eyes and forget  about the guest while Javi fucks my mouth and fingers me again.

I'm so wet for him. So sensitive. I have to pee so badly it hurts. I try  to tell him. To mumble around him. But it's a lost cause. He's lost in  his pleasure now. Using my face to get himself off.

His fingers tangle in my hair, and his eyes stake their claim over every  part of my body. It does not matter what Javi says or what he does.  Because in moments like these, it feels like he cares. It feels like I  mean something to him, even as he uses me.

Perhaps it is only my imagination. Perhaps I am simply trying to  justify. But it's there, and I want more than anything to believe in it.  And when he comes, I swallow everything he has to give me, just the way  he likes.

He pets my cheek again. And then replaces the gag I spit out earlier.

I think that it's over. I think that I've done well and that we have a  connection right now, as he looks down at me, and I see the warmth  creeping back into his eyes.

It doesn't last. I should know by now that it never does.

Javi retrieves a blindfold from his pocket and ties it over my face, obscuring my eyes.

My heartbeat slows. My stomach rolls. A chill creeps over me.

There are footsteps. The intruder. He's coming closer. So close he can touch me. I smell him, and he smells different to Javi.

I shake my head and thrash against the restraints, repeating the same thing over and over again.

No.

He wouldn't do this. Javi wouldn't allow anyone else to touch me. Because I'm his. That's what he says. But it isn't true.

I flinch when I feel fingers on my breast. Touching me. Groping me. My  mind is playing tricks on me. But my ears aren't. It's Javi's voice that  betrays me. Cold and hard and cruel.

"Now you can have a go."

I scream through the gag, and he moves away from me. Abandoning me. Footsteps echo down the hall. And with them, goes my fight.

The stranger drags his fingers down my body. Right between my legs.  Humiliation and shame wash over me, followed by blinding hatred. I hate  him so much.

I will never forgive him for this. Never.

I sob as the hands pry my legs open. And it doesn't feel right because this isn't Javi.

I want to believe it's a trick. I want my Javi. But he doesn't come for  me. Not even when the stranger buries himself inside of me. The  blindfold blocks the sight, but nothing else.

I can still feel him. I can still feel everything.

He fucks me. He touches the parts of my body that belong to Javi. He  twists the plug inside of my ass. My bladder can't take it. I'm too  full. There is too much happening. And I'm still too sensitive. I hate  this man. I hate his hands on my body, his fingers working me over.

I feel sick for responding to him. It's not me. My body is betraying me  too. Because I come again. And this time, the floodgates open.

Mortification burns my cheeks as the liquid drips down my thighs and over him. There is a muffled groan.

And then he's pulling the plug out of me. Replacing it with his cock.

I shake my head again, protesting as he pushes inside. The place that no  man has ever been before. The place that even Javi has not been before.  I beg him through muted sobs. I fight. I twist and thrash and bleed  when the ropes chafe at my wrists.

Eventually, my chest caves in on me, and the only thing to come out of  my lungs is a god-awful wheezing sound. It isn't the physical pain. This  pain inside has crippled me. Javi has stolen everything from me. Right  down to my last breath.                       
       
           



       

The weight of his malice has finally suffocated me. I can't breathe at  all. I'm deep in the throes of a panic attack. And this is how I'm going  to die.

My fingers make one last feeble attempt to claw at my throat. An  instinctive reaction. One still hindered by the restraints. I fall limp.  I stop moving. I stop fighting. The stranger's fingers come up to touch  my face, and I turn away from him.

The gag slips out of my mouth. The blindfold falls away, and still, all I see is black.

My heart has lost the will to go on. My chest is full of cement.

"Bella. My sweet Bella. Shhh, it's okay now. Just breathe."

Javi.

My Javi. My cruel, cruel Javi.

I don't want to believe it. My mind has invented this. I squeeze my eyes  to keep them shut, and he tries to coax them open with words so  deceptively soft.

"It's okay, my Bella. Look at me."

He sounds so real. And I have to know. I open my eyes. Certain I will be  forever damaged. Forever ruined and betrayed and filled with this  hatred.

His beard is the first thing that I see. And then the hood. I look down,  at the place where we are still connected. And it has been him, the  entire time. Inside of me.

Tricking me.

Tormenting me.

I sob, and it is not pretty. He is without mercy. Without humanity. I  was wrong to think there was ever anything else inside of him.

He leans forward and kisses me, his cock still throbbing in my ass. He  tastes my tears and licks my throat. He comforts me with the sweetest  lies.

"It is only me, Bella."

My breath has returned. And Javi does not waste this opportunity. He  thrusts into me, groaning out his pleasure. And I don't understand this.  I don't understand how I can be so broken. How I can be relieved that  it is him, even after what he just did to me. He unties my wrists, and  they are limp at my sides, but still, he drapes them over his back.

I claw into his sweatshirt, wishing I could draw blood, and he fucks me  harder. Kissing me until I bite his lip again and force him away.

"I hate you!" I scream. "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"

He kisses me anyway. And he fucks me anyway. Telling me how good I feel. How much I please him. And then, how I am only his.

"Mine, Bella," he repeats with every thrust. "I would not share you. I never will."

And with these final words, he bottoms out inside of me and shudders out his release.

He collapses on top of me. Kissing my throat. Stroking my hair. Comforting me with his hands and his lies.

"I hate you," I tell him again.

But my voice lacks the conviction to make it believable, even to my own ears.

He unties me and carries me back to the conservatory. I am certain he  will abandon me to my misery now. But instead, he climbs into the bed  behind me and wraps his body around mine. Housing me with his arms and  his warmth.

"My Bella," he whispers into the darkness. "Forgive me."





CHAPTER TWENTY





IN THE QUIET solace of night, her mind is still loud. Haunted by  nightmares of the things I have done to her. The things I can't stop  doing to her.