Bastard(43)

“I want to. Please. I have no idea what to do, but you can show me. I’m a fast learner.” God, like that sounded any better. I feel my face flush. I should’ve just begged for sex. I hate that compared to all the other girls he’s been with, I’m so inexperienced. I’m sure they all knew how to please him. I clench my eyes shut. Somebody kill me now.

“Open your eyes,” he demands. I’m surprised to see him smiling when I do. “I like that about you. I love your innocence and that nobody has been where I’ve been.” I feel relieved that my naivety isn’t turning him off.

“Can you show me what to do? Show me what you like? I want to please you like you please me.” Leaning forward he brushes his lips against mine.

“Nobody has ever said that to me before,” he whispers as his eyes lock with mine.

“I’m sorry,” I say, feeling my face turn even redder. Now I feel like a complete idiot.

“Don’t be. Nobody has ever asked me what I like. What I want. They’ve only cared about what I could give them.”

“Well I care,” I say, reaching up and running my hand gently down the side of his face. And I do care. More than I’d like to admit.

His lips meet mine again as he rolls over onto his back, taking me with him. He lifts his hips slightly off the bed and pulls his pyjama bottoms down around his thighs. Grabbing hold of my hand, he wraps it around his shaft. My small hand barely reaches around his impressive girth. Placing his fingers on top of mine, he slowly moves my hand up and down his length.

“Yes, that’s it,” he moans pulling my lips towards his. “Just like that, beautiful.” I love that he keeps calling me that. I wonder if he says that to all the girls. I try not to let my mind go there. I want to believe that what we have is unique.

Eventually he lets go and I’m doing it on my own. He’s groaning as his hips buck against my hand. I pause the kiss to look down. I want to watch. I love that little old, inexperienced me is making him feel like this, that I’m capable of giving him pleasure.

His penis is the first I’ve ever seen in real life. Meg always says how ugly they are. She obviously hasn’t seen Carter’s, because his is beautiful. I continue stroking it as I sit up. I can see the pre-cum beading at the tip. I want to taste it. Leaning forward I run my tongue around the head.

“Fuck,” he hisses through a clenched jaw. I open my mouth and slide the tip inside. He starts to gently pump into my mouth as his hand threads through my hair, holding my head still. “I’m gonna blow,” he says suddenly trying to pull my head back. I don’t move. I want to keep going. I open my mouth wider and take him in deeper. Closing my lips around his shaft, I continue to work him with my hand. He pumps into my mouth a few more times. “Indi,” he cries out as his body shudders beneath me. “Sweet Jesus … Indiiii.”

This is the first time he’s ever called me by my real name.



“Indi. Wake up,” I hear someone say. Opening my eyes, I’m surprised to see Carter’s handsome face smiling down at me. “We must’ve fallen asleep,” he says in a sleepy voice as he rubs his eyes. What? I’m still half asleep and dazed. Then I remember where I am and what we did. I bolt upright.

“Crap.”

“It’s okay. It’s still the middle of the night. I just thought you might want to get home before your dad finds you missing,” he says sweetly. Looking over towards his bedroom window, I see that it’s pitch black outside. In his room, however, it’s not. His bedside lamp is on. Shit. I’m still naked. My hands fly up to cover my breasts as my eyes frantically search the bed for my pyjamas. I can’t see them anywhere. I feel my face turn red. “Are you okay?” he asks, propping himself up on one elbow.

I can’t bring myself to make eye contact with him. “Do you know where my clothes are?”

“Hey,” he says, placing his hand under my chin to raise my face to meet his. “Are you okay? Are you having regrets?” he asks when our eyes meet. I’m not. How could I? What we shared tonight was amazing. I just feel a little uncomfortable now. It’s one thing to be naked in front of him in the throes of passion, but now not so much. It’s the first time I’ve ever let somebody see me like this.

“No, I’m not,” I reply honestly. “I just want to put my clothes back on.” He reaches out and removes my hands that are covering my breasts.

“Please don’t hide yourself from me,” he pleads. He almost sounds like he’s hurt by my actions. “Your body is beautiful. Don’t ever be ashamed or embarrassed by it. Especially with me.” He says it with so much sincerity I can’t help but smile. Who knew he was capable of saying something so sweet?