"But Nell wouldn't hurt the bairn, Maddy."
Maddy's heart was bursting through her chest. "No one knows that."
The dog that had attacked her had been a family pet. She'd told Jack last night. He'd seen the scars. He'd said he'd understood-understood everything.
Or would he pretend as if none of that had happened, the same way he'd wanted to ignore her in the stables just moments ago?
But when he moved forward-when he put his hand over hers where she held the baby's head close-a static flicker of what they'd known together only hours before zoomed back.
His deep voice was low and gentle. "Maddy … honey … you're overreacting."
Maddy wanted to laugh. She was overreacting? He was the one who wanted to lock everyone away behind these beastly remote station walls.
When he brought her close and urged her hot cheek to rest against his chest, she blinked several times. Concentrating on her breathing, on slowing her heartbeat, the dots before her eyes dispersed and, after a short time, most sped away. Nell lay in the corner, tail to the wall, ears down and head flat on her paws. Maddy swayed, leaned more against Jack and the tingling in her limbs began to fade.
She was stressed. Too much emotion. Too many memories stirred. Didn't change the fact that she would never allow Nell to come so close to Beau again, particularly when the baby was alone. Nothing would change her mind about that, and if anyone thought that was paranoid-tough luck.
But as Jack eased the baby from her arms and Cait called Nell out of the nursery, Maddy filled her lungs with a shuddering breath and the harrowing truth descended.
What could she do about it? If Beau was her child …
But he wasn't. She had as little say in Beau's life now as she had a week ago. Less. And the longer she stayed and had to swallow that reality, the more frustrated and upset she'd become.
Jack had been blunt but also spot-on. The decision was up to her but maybe it would be better better for everyone if she left and never came back.
Ten
In his lifetime, Jack had been to hell and back. Determined to find and sustain the strength he'd needed, most of the day he'd ridden the endless Leadeebrook plains on Herc's back. He'd returned to the homestead calm, cold and resolute.
But moments ago, when he'd taken Beau from Maddy and left her to wash her face and settle down before dinner, he'd been shell-shocked. The weight of the realization was like a stake being thrust into the heart. He was responsible, no one else, for her meltdown.
If she thought she'd fooled him in the stables into thinking their night together had meant little more than an adventurous fling on the side, she was mistaken. If she thought he didn't understand about Nell tonight in the nursery, after seeing those scars, of course he did. But, as harsh as he might've sounded, he meant what he'd said.
Soon her time here would be reduced to a quaint story retold over Friday night cocktails. He would be the one left to make decisions for Beau and, damn right, he trusted Nell. More than he'd trust the drug addicts and pimps who trawled Sydney's King's Cross in broad daylight.
Forget about meltdowns and hurt feelings. Madison Tyler would always find fault with his world and he with hers. Fair enough, she was locked into her life and her future. She wanted to leave here to get back to it. Pity was she couldn't see what she set her compass by.
After their talk last night in Clancy, it was clear her main motivation in her job was her desire to prove herself to her father. Maddy wanted her father, as well as herself, to know she was strong. Strong enough to battle and survive anything.
Hell, who was he fooling? He was no better. He was as stubborn as she was. Worse.
Grumbling to himself, Jack carefully lay the baby down on the changing table. Beau wasn't his usual chirpy self either. After making a silly sound, Jack blew a raspberry on the baby's tummy and was rewarded by having his hair pulled by its roots. Little monkey.
Yep, he and Beau James would be happy here. People might call him a wealthy recluse behind his back, but so what? He wasn't budging, just like Maddy wasn't giving up Sydney or her dad.
Jack sprinkled powder, slipped on the diaper, smoothed over the tabs.
When an hour later, Maddy hadn't emerged from her room, Cait ventured in with a small plate of supper. Jack wasn't too hungry either, but he made a show for Cait's sake then took Beau out onto the veranda. He settled down on a chair with the baby on his lap. They were both keeping watch over another peaceful night when Snow Gibson rode up.
With that notorious bow-legged stride, Snow ascended the steps, found a beer in the outside fridge, tickled Beau's chin then pulled up a seat.
Jack said, "Missed you at supper." Snow had always joined him and Cait for Sunday dinner at the homestead.
"I sent word to Cait I wouldn't make it tonight."
"She said. What's up?"
Snow chugged on his beer then concentrated on the horizon.
"When I was your age, Jum, I was hop scotching around the place. Got all the way over to Western Australia one year. Sold carpet in Adelaide for a spell. Alice Springs was blasted hot but I wouldn't give it back for a row of Sundays. My only regret is that I didn't find a good woman, one to have that family with." He grinned over. "Maybe it's not too late."
Rearranging Beau, Jack shifted up in his chair. This sounded serious. "What's going on?"
"The bush is in my blood, but I'm too young to hide away, dig a hole and die just yet."
Jack caught on and he grinned. "And I am, too, right?"
"What you have here won't go away." Beau received an earnest tip of his head. "You want to take that boy of yours and do some living. You're a rich man. Some'd say filthy rich. Put that money to good use. Get a life."
Snow stood, finished his beer, hitched up his jeans and headed down the steps.
Jack watched his friend mount and ride away. When he looked down, Beau was asleep. He eased up and headed for the nursery.
He appreciated the concern but Snow didn't have his facts straight. He wasn't dying here. His aim was to give Beau a safe upbringing. And he wasn't about to marry Maddy and have a family, if that was the hint.
Sure, the attraction that zapped between them couldn't be mistaken and, certainly, Beau loved Maddy. But the gulf that ran between them was as wide as the Murray. He was done thinking about it. Done mulling over the things that were better left to lie.
The kitchen was empty. Cait must've taken herself upstairs to bed. Jack entered the darkened nursery but stopped when he saw Maddy curled up in a corner sofa chair. A light blanket was cocooned around her chin. Her wrist, drooped over the arm of the chair, as well as her breathing, said she was sound asleep.
Her hair was a pale shimmering river spilling over her shoulder and he had to curb the impulse to settle Beau down then quietly carry her off to his bed and make love to her the way his body begged him to. But that wouldn't change the fact she'd be gone tomorrow.
Would she come back?
After today? Not likely.
He'd make sure she saw Beau if ever he landed in Sydney. But one day-and probably soon-Maddy would have her own family. She would be a prize for any man. She'd remember Dahlia's child fondly. Hopefully remember their night fondly, too. He always would.
Jack laid Beau in his bed and headed for the door. But then he stopped, frowned and turned back.
He couldn't say where the thought sprang from. He was certain in no possible way would it work. But she did love that baby, and last night proved that they were compatible, in the bedroom as well as intellectually. He knew deep down that advertising wasn't her thing, it was her father's.
What if he asked her to stay?
When Maddy's eyes dragged open, she wasn't sure of the time.
Rubbing her face, she sharpened her gaze and honed in on the window. Still dark, although a streaking mist hinted at the coming dawn. She straightened, winced. Someone had used her back as a pretzel.
The outline of Beau's crib cleared out of the shadows and her mind slotted up a gear. Twenty-four hours ago she'd been in Clancy, drifting off in that big beautiful bed, a satisfied smile on her face. Jack's arms had kept her so warm and close. Yesterday afternoon the illusion had been shattered.
Clenching her teeth against the crick in her spine, she moved to the crib.
She'd made a fool of herself over Nell. She had no say, no power here. Now there was nothing left for her but to escape. And yet what she wouldn't give to be here with Beau. To be here for him. There were women who'd had to give up their children at birth, or lost them in custody battles or to illness. To accidents. What Jack had endured when he'd lost his unborn baby had to be far worse than this.