I grin. “Then shall we go and find our furs?”
“Sounds like a wonderful idea to me.” She glances around as if to see if anyone is watching. Then she gives a small shrug of her shoulders and pulls me toward the cave she shares with Jo-see. Someone hoots in response and I laugh, because this cave has no secrets. This time, though, it does not matter if they know. We are mated. Nothing changes that.
Let them know I will take my mate to my furs and lick every bit of her flesh. Let them hear her cries of pleasure. It will let them know that she is mine. My mate, my resonance.
My everything.
Chapter Eighteen
JOSIE
I sigh as I watch Tiff and Salukh not-so-furtively sneak into the cave for some nookie. I’m happy they’re happy, but being with them the last few days is trying my last damn nerve. They resonated. Great. I’m stoked for them. Jealous, too, but mostly stoked. What’s hard is that I keep worrying about me. I’m the last single woman, the last lonely human. Am I going to have a cave by myself? Am I going to be stuck in someone else’s cave like a reject? Am I going to have to listen to everyone else make out and know that I’m never going to have a mate because Harlow can’t fix the stupid surgery machine?
I stare glumly at the fire. Even all the terrible sa-khui singing (and man, they are terrible at it) and the alcohol can’t get me happy. It wasn’t so bad when I wasn’t the last human alone. I didn’t feel like a total reject then.
Now? Now I feel like a total reject.
It’s a feeling I’m kind of used to, after being dumped from a half-dozen foster homes growing up. Here, though, I felt like I was part of a family, at least for a while. Then one by one, the family paired off with mates. Not just any mate, fated mates. And now they’re all popping out babies and here I am, still sitting on the bench, waiting my turn.
A small movement catches my eye and I look up from the fire to see Haeden scowling in my direction from his vantage point in the shadows. He looks pissier than usual, which is kind of a feat for him. Our eyes lock and he crosses his arms over his chest, as if daring me to confront him. Whatever. I make a face at him. I don’t know why he’s got a hate-boner for me but I’m tired of it. I’m a little pleased – and weirdly disappointed – when he stalks away.
I nudge Farli, who’s settling in next to me with her paint pots. “So what’s with Haeden lately?”
“Hmm?” She dabs a brush in red and then paints a dot on my arm.
“He looks more angry than usual,” I tell her, and obediently turn my arm so she can paint an accompanying blue dot next to the red one.
“Oh. He was very…sour…when he found out you went to the main tribal cave alone. He yelled at Taushen for many hours.”
My eyebrows go up. “Why? He hates me.”
She shrugs and holds my arm, painting a ticklish circle on it. “He is protective of females. He thinks it is foolish to risk them.”
Oh barf. So he’s a chauvinist. “I was perfectly fine.” Sure, it was a little scary, but I handled it.
“Yes, but humans are weak. He says that risking your life means risking more than just one life. It is potentially robbing another male of his mate and kits.”
“Good thing I’m only worth my vagina to him,” I say blandly. Joke’s on him, my girl parts have a permanent no-vacancy sign on them, alas.
“What is va-shy-nuh?” Farli asks. “I do not know this word.”
“Never mind.” I probably shouldn’t be teaching Farli dirty human words. She can’t be more than fourteen or so. “He’s just a jerk. Always has been and always will be.”
“What is yerk?” She draws another circle on my arm, this time a sickly green. “You’re fun to paint on, Jo-see. You are white like Cham-phee’s belly. The colors show up nicely.”
Greeeaaaat. “A jerk is a man who thinks with his male parts.”
She giggles.
So much for my vow not to teach her bad human words. Oh well.
The murmur of voices dies for a moment, and as they do, I hear a throaty moan coming from my cave. Ah, crap. Tiff’s definitely getting it on with Salukh, and it sounds like they don’t know – or don’t care – how loud they are. Farli seems unfazed by the noise, though Taushen gets up and leaves the fire. Yeah, I know how he feels, but at least he doesn’t have to room with the happy couple. I do.
Well, at least for tonight. Tomorrow, who knows. I’ll probably be rooming with the baskets tomorrow. Or the dvisti. Great. Me and the dvisti – the only creatures no one wants to hang with.
I’m not that chatty, so Farli eventually moves on to someone else, and I stay by the fire, moping. I can’t go back to my cave, not with those two getting it on. Maybe I’ll go borrow a blanket from Kira and hide in one of the now-empty caves. I get to my feet, and as I do, a soft clink at my feet catches my attention.