I’m left tingling from that small touch, and full of aching need. Why me? Why must I be the unluckiest girl alive?
Because I know the moment I give in to my wants and have a relationship with Aehako, that’s the moment he’s going to resonate to another woman.
And I’ll be left alone. Again.
It’s not until he’s halfway down the ridge that I realize I still have the leather-wrapped dildo in my hands. “Wait,” I call. “Take this back!”
He ignores me.
• • •
I remain outside until I can’t stand the cold any longer. Then, my fingers nippy with frost, my face chapped from the wind and my bag full of herbs, I finally return to the caves. The dildo is shoved into my herb bag since I don’t know what else to do with it, but it sticks out an obscene amount. Fact of the matter is, it’s huge. There’s no way any guy’s dick is this big. Not that I’m an expert on dicks, of course. I thought briefly about burying it in the snow but after all the time and effort Aehako put into it, it seems wrong.
Plus, I might want to study it a bit more when I’m alone.
I head inside and blow on my fingers to warm them. Gloves are a priority, as are snowshoes. Actually, we need a little bit of everything, if I’m being honest. Bras, panties – and I shudder to think what it’s going to be like when I get my period again. I missed it last month, but I’ve never been regular. Thank goodness, because these people wear leather, and it doesn’t make a great pair of underpants. Our options are pretty limited, though, and beggars certainly can’t be choosers. We’re lucky to be warm and fed.
The main cave is fairly quiet, though I wave at a few people that are hanging out in the central pool. During the day, a lot of the men go out and hunt for small game nearby, and the crafters work. Josie mentioned to me that Maylak’s husband Kashrem has a cave a short distance away that he uses for tanning, since it smells so bad that even our blunted senses get offended.
I head for the healer’s cave, and tap the wall outside since the leather curtain is drawn over the entrance. “Maylak?”
“Kay-sah,” she calls out. Come in, the translator intones in my ear.
I enter, and she’s not alone. Megan’s lying on the mat in front of the healer, and Maylak’s three-fingered hands are spread wide over her belly. Her eyes are glowing fiercely, which I have learned happens when she’s deep into her healing. In the corner, Maylak’s little girl, Esha, plays with a few bone toys.
“Oh. Is this a bad time?” I say it in English because we still don’t know the alien language.
“It’s okay,” Megan says with a soft smile. “I was just having Maylak check me out and stuff. To see if, you know…all my parts are working correctly or if the Little Green Men damaged something.”
When they gave her the abortion? Oh. I hadn’t even considered it. I sit down at the end of the mat while Maylak gives me a shy smile and then continues her work, pressing her hands gently on Megan’s stomach. The baby – she has to be two, max – sees me and toddles over with a happy gurgle.
No translation, the translator says. It’s baby talk. I grin and hold my hands out for Esha, and she hops into my lap, fearless. Her small blue hand immediately goes to my brow and she rubs it, feeling the difference between her ridged brow and my own.
“I was picking herbs and thought I’d drop them off,” I say by way of explanation. “Has she been able to find anything wrong?”
Megan shrugs but doesn’t get up. “There’s a bit of a language barrier, but so far she hasn’t freaked out.”
“That’s good,” I say, then stifle a laugh when Esha peels back my lip and examines my square teeth. Her own are sharp little fangs.
“Esha,” Maylak calls out and gives a small shake of her head.
“It’s okay,” I say, and bounce the baby a little. “I don’t mind.” I like children. I know Liz complained that she wasn’t ready to be a mom, and Georgie said she never thought about children, but I do. I think about them all the time. Maybe because I can’t have any.
Maylak pats Megan’s stomach and the hard glow in her eyes softens a bit. “Finished,” Maylak says in her language, and the translator automatically pings in with the words.
“She’s done,” I offer to Megan, who is looking at me, waiting.
“Am I okay?” Megan asks Maylak, sitting up. She puts a hand to her stomach and then moves her hands in a cradling motion, indicating a baby. “Is everything working properly?”
The healer nods and spouts a stream of the fluid alien language, gesturing at Megan’s stomach and then looking at me. They all know I can translate. Your womb has been wounded recently, Maylak says. There was a baby there once, but no longer. Your khui is repairing the damage. It is almost done, and when it is, there should be no reason why you should not be able to carry a child like any other woman. Give it a turn of the Little Moon and see.