Barbarian Alien(64)

Silence falls in the cave.

Kira blinks and sits nearby with her own sewing, the big shell of the translator in her ear sticking out painfully. “I thought they said that this was the bitter season.”

“Oh yeah,” I say, stabbing my bone needle through the leather. “It is. But then comes the brutal season. They’re a whole bunch of Eeyores, this group.”

“You mean it’s going to get colder?” Harlow doesn’t sound happy. “I can’t believe that this is considered warm to them.”

“Did you not see the summer gear they all wear? Vektal’s prancing around in a vest, for fuck’s sake.” They’re silent, and I see they’re all digesting this information.

“How did you find out?” Josie asks.

“Raahosh told me.” I can’t help but twist the knife a little. “Gee. I wonder what other things they’re not telling you guys? I thought we were supposed to be equals but maybe the goal is to keep us all barefoot and pregnant and sewing.”

More silence. I see Josie put down her sewing, upset.

“I think I need to take a walk,” Megan says, and gets up and leaves the cave.

Seed of dissent? Firmly planted. I bite back my smile and sew cheerfully. If I’m going to be fucking miserable, I’m going to take them all with me.

The others scatter, the cheerful mood gone, and pretty soon it’s just me and Kira sitting by the fire, sewing.

“What are you doing?” Kira asks.

I hold up the poncho. “Sewing like a good little woman.”

“No, seriously, Liz. Are you trying to stir up shit?” Her weirdly blue-glowing gaze pierces me.

“So what if I am?”

She puts her sewing in her lap and her mouth flattens into a hard line. “Have you thought about this? Really and truly thought about this?”

“Look, all I can think about right now is my guy, and the fact that a bunch of jerks won’t let me be with him! They want me to take a mate. I did. They wanted him to knock me up, and then the moment he does, he gets exiled. So you’ll forgive me if I’m not feeling charitable towards the ice Na’vi right now on Frosty Planet Avatar.”

She exhales loudly. “Did it ever stop to occur to you that we’re all dependent on their goodwill? They know how to survive here. We don’t. They can hunt here and know the planet. We don’t. Before they took us in, we didn’t know how to build a fire or even feed ourselves. Look around you, Liz. There’s no grocery store or snow-cone shack here. There’s no Wal-Mart for warm clothing and there’s no central heat. So I don’t want you pissing these people off, understand? Because if we have to end up back in the snow again on our own, there’s a lot worse that could happen to us than doing a little sewing!” She gets to her feet and leaves, tossing her silky brown hair behind her.

In a network of overcrowded caves, I have somehow managed to piss off everyone enough that they’ve left me alone for the first time in a day and a half. A weird, miserable little half laugh bubbles from my throat, and it turns into tears soon enough. I sniff and wipe at my cheeks, hating that I’m crying.

I think I’d rather be out in the wild with Raahosh than in here, alone and missing him.

And it’s only been a day. How am I expected to just carry on as if my heart isn’t broken?

My cootie is silent. It agrees with me. This is no way to live.

I stab my needle into the fur again and sit in the humans’ cave by myself.



• • •





I end up sleeping in Kira’s bed again that night, except instead of Raahosh holding me close, it’s Kira wrapped in blankets on the other side of me. I end up weeping quietly for most of the night, miserable. How is Raahosh able to stand this? He’s out in the cold snow, alone. He can find a cave and take care of himself, but my mind is full of his lonely vigil up on the rise, staring down at the cave, hoping for a glimpse of me.

I sleep terrible that night despite all the comforts of the tribal caves. My mind is full of nightmares, and when I wake up, I’m queasy. I barely make it out of the bachelorette cave before I’m stumbling to the cave entrance, looking for somewhere to barf. There’s a bathroom system in the caves but the entrance is a lot closer. I make it out into the snow a few moments before I puke, and then retch miserably for a few minutes before sitting up and wiping my mouth.

Kira’s there a moment later and offers me something that looks like a foot long, pink eyelash. “Eat this.”

“What the fuck is it?” I clutch my aching stomach.

She points at the pink, wispy trees. “A leaf, I think. They make a tea out of it too, but Maylak says it’s good for the stomach when it’s upset.”