“Told ya he gets excited.” Tex laughed.
“What if I don’t want to get married?” I clenched my hands together, my heart wasn’t sure if it should be breaking or soaring. Ax was all I’d ever wanted… but I wanted him on my terms. I wanted him to want me, to propose to me, to say he loved me so much he couldn’t live without me. Not like this. I didn’t want him like this.
“Tough.” Chase shrugged. “We do what we do for the Family. You aren’t allowed an opinion, not when it puts every single one of us in danger, not when we’re doing our damndest to save your life. Got it?”
Whoa. And Chase officially just got scarier than Nixon.
“Okay.” I hung my head. “I’ll do it.”
“See, Nixon?” Chase said loudly. “You didn’t even need to point a gun at her.”
“Not now, Chase.” Ax reached for my hand, but I jerked away from him. Had he known the whole time? Had he been playing me? Making me believe he would protect me? Protect my heart? When he was just planning on breaking it all over again?
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Axton
THE GUYS LEFT.
The minute they walked out of the house I wordlessly pushed past Phoenix, grabbed Sergio’s gun off the table, and made my way outside to the field by our house.
I fired the first target. Bang. It hit dead center.
I fired the second. Bang.
I didn’t feel better.
I fired again and again and again.
I fired until I had no more ammo. Stupid gun. I dropped it onto the ground and followed suit, hanging my head in my hands as I listened to the music of the cows in the nearby pasture. We lived away from society, away from the city. One could almost believe our family was normal. A normal mansion on a normal piece of land with normal cows.
Hell, the cows were even a cover.
Killers didn’t keep cows alive. Right?
“Hey.” Sergio dropped down next to me on the grass. “You alright?”
I grunted in response.
“There are worse things.”
“Seriously?” I turned and leveled him with a glare. “That’s your brotherly advice? There are worse things? I love that girl! I freaking love her!” My shout scared the cows closest to us making them run in the opposite direction. “I love her!”
“You think I don’t know that?” he said in a low voice. “You think I don’t realize the extent you would go to save her? To be a part of her life?”
“Then why the hell would you say that?”
“They offered me the job.” Sergio scowled. “Apparently Nixon thought it would cheer me up after Mo married Tex. Go find the long lost girl and marry her, make things right.”
My heart damn near stopped beating as I fought for air.
“Guess what I said.”
I looked away.
Sergio kept talking. “I said unrequited love isn’t really my thing… Mo didn’t love me… Amy could never love me and although I’m pretty sure everyone in my life thinks I’m a cold heartless bastard, I think I deserve that… love. I deserve to have a girl look at me the way Amy looks at you. The way Mo looks at Tex. I deserve it, Ax. And so do you. Like I said, there are worse things.”
“That’s why you pulled me out of hiding? To marry her?”
“Right.” Sergio smirked. “But knowing you I couldn’t just say, hey by the way save her life, rescue her, woo her, and then marry her to keep her alive. You would have laughed in my face, or worse punked out and run.”
“I don’t run.”
“No.” Sergio tilted his head. “You hide.”
“Excuse me?” I pushed to my feet; he followed. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“I messed up.” Sergio shrugged. “It was a long time ago, I was scared, but you used that one moment in our lives to define the rest of our relationship. That one moment defined your future and you just let it. You just… gave up.”
I looked down at the grass.
“I was afraid you’d do the same thing if I told you the whole truth.”
“That wasn’t your call to make,” I grumbled.
“Actually…” Sergio sighed loudly. “As your older brother it kind of was, it kind of is. Going through life… eating but not tasting food. Waking up only to go through the motions, that’s not life. And that’s exactly what you were doing. Mourning her loss every day, blaming yourself every hour, hating me every minute.”
Sergio fell silent then turned on his heel, but not before having one last word. “I did you a favor. Don’t let me down.”
“You suck at pep talks.” I winced as I felt a headache coming on. “But as a brother… you’re not awful.”