Bait & Switch(23)

He let out a deep sigh and his eyes shifted away, taking several moments before he continued. “I still ask myself if I’d been there that day, maybe he’d still be around. Maybe my mom wouldn’t look at me with those blank, haunted eyes, like she was wondering the exact same thing.”

I reached over and silently placed my hand on his knee, hoping the touch had the same calming effect it had had on me earlier.

“My mom sold off all the land he loved so much. I don’t think she liked the thought that the land was ultimately what took him from her.”

Something tugged inside my chest. I wished like hell I could fix this for him, but deep down, I knew nothing ever would. Sometimes our greatest scars are the ones we don’t wear for the world to see. They’re buried inside our hearts.

I gave him the only comfort I could. “I know your dad would be very proud of you. If he’d known what a successful and courageous man you’ve become, he never would have wanted you to stay home. Just think of all the things you couldn’t fulfill if you didn’t leave.”

Nolan smiled at me, but his thoughts still seemed faraway. “Maybe. Enough about that, though. I meant today to be fun.”

I squeezed his thigh in silent understanding. “Another beer?” I waved down the vendor again. “My treat this time.”

“Did I tell you that you look beautiful today?” he asked, leaning across the space to place his lips at my neck.

My throat tightening, I shook my head. “Not yet anyway.”

“Because you look fucking stunning,” he whispered against my skin.

Maybe sex was his way of dealing with the demons of his past. A distraction, a release. Is that what his arrangement with Daniella is about? Or is he just too much for one woman to handle? A rush of warmth settled in my chest at the thought.

With our second drinks in hand, the earlier lighthearted mood returned. Soon we were cheering and trash-talking the athletes on the field, enjoying each other’s company and the crisp fall day.

• • •

Arriving back at my place after the game, Nolan parked under the awning that stretched alongside the building. We sat quietly and watched the sun sink low in the sky. The atmosphere around us took on a hazy glow as day slowly transitioned into night. The warm cab of his truck was scented lightly with the dark notes of his cologne, swamping the space with sexual undertones.

I couldn’t remember ever having more fun. But when I turned to tell him so, the deep, penetrating look in his eyes stole my breath. It was almost like I could read his every thought—and they were searing. His gaze was filled with a dark, primal urge that called to something inside me.

“I’m running from something.” The words sprang from my mouth without warning. And once they were out—hanging between us in the silent cab of the truck—my heart started to pound.

“Care to tell me what, sweetheart?”

I shook my head. “I can’t tell you. I’m sorry.”

He was quiet for a moment. Then he reached over and placed his hand on my knee, giving it a squeeze. “Nothing’s going to get you.”

“No? Why not?” Hope blossomed in my chest, and I hung on to his every word like it was a lifeline.

“Because they’d have to get through me first. And that ain’t fucking happening on my watch.”

My heart slammed against my chest and my breathing shallowed. Those were the best words on the planet; everything I’d longed to hear.

But I knew something he didn’t. Something that would make him put me on the first plane back home without even a good-bye. My secret had seemed too big and important to tell at the time, but now, I wished I’d just come clean from the beginning. Because I knew the truth would have to come out at some point, and by then, it would be a huge, ugly divide between us. An insurmountable lie of omission.

But Nolan didn’t press me, didn’t take me by the shoulders and demand answers like I expected. And his blind trust stung more than if he’d yelled and screamed in my face and demanded I come clean.

I waited for him to say something more, but he didn’t. Which was good, because I didn’t have the answers he needed.

Suddenly, he leaned over and seized my mouth in a possessive kiss. A whimper escaped me and my fingers dug into his shoulders. The kiss turned deep and molten, our tongues dueling for control. I wasn’t about to back down from this big, powerful man who held the promise of my entire future in his hands.

He hauled me across the front seat’s center console to straddle his lap. The massive bulge in his jeans was unmistakable. The man was hung, and apparently his cock was hungry. For me. I wanted to feel it in my hand, in my mouth . . .