“You’re better than this stress, Shay,” Azariah said. “Go buy yourself some fancy clothes, a new car. Hell, travel to Europe. What do you need school for?”
I shrugged, sipping my drink instead of answering. It wasn’t about the money. It was about what I wanted to do, how I wanted to help people.
“She needs to get laid,” Layna said. “Sit on some big ol’ cock and forget all her troubles.”
Nikkole snickered. “But Azariah said—”
Azariah cleared her throat, pushing her drink at Nikkole. “Here. Take this. Shove something in that fat mouth of yours.”
Oh, Christ. She didn’t. I stared at her. “You told them?”
Heaven still flipped through the menu. She arched an eyebrow. “That you’re banging your brother? Way to go.”
“I’m not—”
Banging him? I stopped myself, but that didn’t make the words any less true.
It was twice now. Twice I spent the greatest nights of my life in his arms, cuddled to his chest, slamming on his cock.
I had no idea what happened last night, and so I panicked. I didn’t talk to him. I didn’t think about it. I didn’t explain. I…froze.
And when Zach came to talk to me?
I retreated so damn fast I was lucky I didn’t fall on my ass and reveal everything that clutched at my heart, fluttered in my stomach, and scared the ever-loving hell out of me.
“He’s not my brother,” I said. “He’s my step-brother…if it even counts since our parents are dead.”
“Still fucking weird,” Heaven grumbled.
“Heav, shut your mouth.” Azariah threatened her with a drink umbrella. “It was only once. She didn’t know who he was.”
I took another swig. It wasn’t as casual as I thought. I should have stood in the booth, crashed my glass to the floor, and shouted to the masses Incest is Best!
“Oh, shit, Shay,” Azariah said. “You didn’t.”
“It’s not like that.”
“You fucked your brother again?”
“Really, it’s not—”
Nikkole snorted. “I told you to live a little, girl.”
“Can we not talk about this?” I asked. “Please?”
Wasn’t going to happen. My friends cackled with the great and juiciest piece of gossip since Nikkole’s brother accidentally knocked up his girlfriend and her best friend—at the same time.
Well, they weren’t getting any details about my night. I needed to figure out what happened before I could explain it to them. They didn’t know Zach.
Yes, he was sexy, but he was also the type who knew it.
Yes, he was a man-whore, but he sounded so sincere when he reassured me.
Yes, he was my step-brother, but we didn’t grow up together. Our parents only married a short time ago, and we were two consenting adults.
My friends waited for the dirty details, but the person I should have talked to waited for me at home. He was probably looking for an explanation…or a sequel to last night’s events. And the way my body still buzzed? He’d get both.
But I expected him to make a fuss when I brushed him off. Zach usually fought to the death over a choice of pizza toppings. Pissing me off was his favorite damn sport. He came to me, and I freaked, but instead of calling me out on it—like he did everything else—he said he…wouldn’t wait up?
The hollow exhaustion in his voice pitted my stomach more than the judgmental glances that passed between my friends.
Maybe Zach…didn’t care?
“Are you still graduating? Shay?” Layna drew my attention. “If you aren’t student teaching, can you finish school?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“What about your party?”
Seriously? Professor Sweeten ripped my heart out, and they worried about the damn graduation party?
“I don’t know.”
“We need that party!” She spun the straw in her water. “Fine. We’ll move it up. Screw graduating. We’ll have a Shay Is Free party.”
I didn’t want to be free. In fact, I wanted to be so layered in school work, chalk dust, and demerit slips I’d be dreaming the ABCs when I got home.
“Maybe?” I frowned. “I’m not feeling like partying.”
Layna huffed. “You mean to tell me you have a giant ass house, pool, tennis courts, and gold fountains, and you don’t want to party?”
“It’s not that. Of course I want to celebrate.”
Maybe.
“Good. We’re on. We’ll have a big blowout. Fuck graduating. You’re rich. What do you need an education for?”
I didn’t need a degree, but a hell of a lot of other kids did. How would I help them now?
“We’ll figure something out,” I said. “Can we order dinner?”
Heaven dropped the menu and flashed me a glance that practically layered Atlanta in ice.
“Look, Shay. I love you, but get your head out of your ass.”
The table quieted. So did the tables surrounding us. Two booths away, someone broke a breadstick with a crack. She was immediately hushed.
“You’re a fucking billionaire. You have a car, a house, a future. You never have to worry about a goddamned thing ever again. So don’t sit here and pretend to be humble.”
“Pretend?”
Heaven’s lips pouted even when she was happy. Now that she scolded me? Disapproval was her superpower, and we hadn’t found any kryptonite to throw at her.
“You’ve always pretended that the money didn’t matter. Look at your purse. Your shoes. Your car. So you lived in an apartment with your mom before college. We all did, honey.” She scoffed. “I don’t know what’s sadder. You flaunting the money…or you pretending you never had any to begin with.”
“Heaven, I didn’t—”
“It doesn’t matter. Go plan your party. Live in your estate. Fuck your brother. God knows someone as rich as you can get away with whatever you want.”
“That’s not true!”
“I don’t even know why you’re sitting here with us,” Heaven said. “You’ve been checking your phone every ten seconds since we got here. Do you have somewhere better to be? Bank’s closed, sweetheart.”
“Holy Christ, Heaven.” Azariah frowned. “What climbed up your ass?”
Heaven returned to scouring the menu. She gave Azariah a pissy glance. “Just ask her what you wanted. Tell her why we came out tonight. Go on, Zar. Ask her.”
I swallowed. “Ask me what?”
Azariah was in no mood. Even I never riled her up that much. “Drop it, Heaven.”
“I’ll tell her if you don’t.”
Azariah’s nails were too sharp to risk getting her angry. I laid a hand over her wrist.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
Azariah’s gaze lowered. Something told me she wasn’t really reading the advertisement for the double fudge brownie sundae.
“I meant…to ask you for a loan.”
“A…what?”
“My car’s in bad shape. I need a new alternator and breaks.”
I swallowed. “Oh.”
“Just a loan. I’d pay you back.”
My best friend of fifteen years should never have looked that ashamed to come to me for help. “Of course.”
The rest of the table shifted, taking awkward sips of their drinks. Azariah shrugged at the other girls.
Layna was the first to speak. “Books this year were expensive. I was going to ask too.”
I stilled. I suddenly understood. Layna nudged Nikkole with an elbow into her side.
Nikkole smiled. “Trey is getting married. I have to buy a dress.”
I didn’t know what to say. “You…all want loans?”
Heaven showed me her broken phone. “My screen’s cracked. I need a new cell before this one dies.”
“Oh.” My stomach twisted. “I mean…I don’t know.”
Azariah’s voice softened. “I don’t think the car will make it through the week.”
“Well…I want to help, but—”
Heaven snorted. She tossed her phone into her purse and muttered to Layna. “Told you she wouldn’t do a damn thing.”
“Wait!” I said. “Why didn’t you think I’d help? You know that I’d do anything for you.”
“Would you? Now?” Heaven’s tone was too sharp for a girl I let copy from my homework all freshman year. “You don’t need us. Why would help out your so-called friends when you could sit up in your mansion and fuck your brother?”
“Don’t you dare!” I groaned. “Look, I’ll do whatever I can, but you guys know my trust hasn’t kicked in yet. I don’t have the money.”
“How do you afford the house?”
“My dead father’s estate pays for the upkeep.” I gritted my teeth. “You really think I’d deny you guys? Well, Heaven, you can screw yourself, but you three…” I swallowed. Azariah, Layna, and Nikkole had the decency to look away. “When you said to come out tonight…you weren’t trying to help me with Professor Sweeten at all. You just wanted…money?”
Heaven sipped her water. “Told ya’ll.”
“Know what?” I dug through my purse and found two crumpled twenties. I tossed them on the table. “There. That’s everything I have on me. Divvy it up. I’ll sell off a fucking rug or something tomorrow. You can have whatever you need.”