"It wasn't my choice to make." Jake's tone was harsh. "Zach pointed out, quite realistically, that if he spent his life locked away in Spain, then this would never be over."
"But he would have been safe."
"He's not the sort of man who puts safety high on his priorities. He'd hardly be seeing you if he did," he added drily. "Look, Dani, I'd be the same with Kim. Just let him do this and kick his ass later."
She bit her lip hard to stop the words pouring out, then gave a quick nod before realizing he wouldn't see it. "Okay. But he's not the only one who'll be getting his ass kicked when this is over."
"I'm sure he isn't."
"Send him back to me in one piece. And call me when it's finished."
"I will."
She put the phone down, sank onto the sofa, and bent her head to her knees while the anger oozed out of her, leaving her shaky and weak. The TV was still on but the camera had moved away from Zach and Jess and was concentrating on the stage.
The nausea was back and she wobbled to her feet and just made it to the bathroom before she lost her pizza. It occurred to her that if Zach did love her, then this was how he would feel every day if she went back into the army.
How could she do that to anyone?
All soldiers' partners went through it, but she had done her bit. She'd given ten years of her life, and maybe now it was time to stand down and see what else she could do.
She watched the rest of the program, saw Zach come up on the stage and accept his award, tried to make sense of his speech, but the words all jumbled in her head. She felt sick, afraid, still angry with him for excluding her. This was the one thing she was good at.
Finally, it was over. She hunched on the sofa waiting for Jake to call. Or Zach to call. For anyone to call and tell her he was safe.
The TV still flickered but she stared vacantly, her mind on hold as she waited. A picture of Zach came up on the screen and she became instantly alert.
Breaking news. Writer Zachary Hunter has been shot while leaving an award ceremony in the center of London. He has been taken to hospital, but at this time, his condition is unknown. Though eye witnesses state he was shot in the arm and chest.
Dani stared at the screen, waiting for someone to come on and say it was all a mistake. But she knew it wasn't a mistake.
She'd thought he would walk away. She'd never considered-even with the death threats hanging over his head-that he would be taken from her. But that could happen so easily. Like Sam. One minute so full of life and the next
Zach couldn't be dead.
She reached for her phone, her hand trembling, and punched in Jake's number, but it went straight to voicemail. She tried Zach's next and was unsurprised when she got no answer. Panic clawed at her. Where would they take him? Was he still alive? Her breaths were coming too fast and her heart was slamming, heat washing over her in waves.
It was happening again.
Losing someone she loved. She should never have allowed herself to feel. Now she was paying the price.
Calm down.
She pressed her fingers to her forehead and stared at her phone, her vision blurring. Jess. Jess had been there-she'd know. She was about to press the numbers when the phone rang. She jumped, almost dropping it, then pressed it to her ear.
"He's okay," Jake said.
Wild relief flooded her. She blinked back tears and swallowed. How could he be all right? "They said he'd been shot in the chest."
"He was wearing a vest. He's fine. A flesh wound in the arm and some bruising, that's all."
"Where is he?"
"Westminster hospital."
"I'll be there."
Dani put the phone down and sat for a few moments, willing her heart to slow, her breathing to calm. She couldn't do this. Wrapping her arms around her waist, she tried to control the shivers running through her.
Never again.
She didn't want to face losing someone else she loved. Better to walk away now. In time, she'd get over this.
She hadn't told him she loved him. Now she never would.
"Did you get ahold of her?" Zach asked as Jake entered the room. He flinched as the nurse swabbed his arm-whatever she was using stung like hell-then forced his attention back to Jake. Christ, he hoped Dani had taken his advice and slept through all this. But what were the chances?
"Yeah. She's on her way. Prepare yourself for five foot one of pissed-off woman."
"She's upset?"
"A little. I didn't tell you, but she called earlier. She saw you and Jess on the TV and put it together."
"Shit."
"Well, at least she didn't jump to the conclusion you were being unfaithful."
"She might have taken that better." His chest ached as if he'd been hit with a hammer, and his arm stung like fire. "Just tell me it worked. Tell me you caught the bastards." Then at least he could concentrate on Dani without looking over his shoulder every minute.
"Every last one of them. Jess is down at the station going through the details with the cops. But look on the bright side-they shot you. They're going to get sent away for a long time."
He sighed. Dani would come around. Against all the odds-he loved her. Instead of the usual stifling fear that normally assaulted him when he thought about long-term relationships, all he felt was a sense of anticipation. He wanted to show Dani everything. He was aware she didn't think much of his lifestyle, thought he was useless, but he'd show her different. And there were plenty of things she could do in L.A. Maybe she could start a rescue center for dogs like Skip. Or a training center where she could train the celebrities and their pampered pooches. He grinned at the thought of a few of his acquaintances being "trained" by Sergeant Danielle Sinclair.
He could make her happy. If she gave him the chance. He knew she loved him. While she'd never said the words, he'd seen it in her eyes when they'd made love that night.
"Get that grin off your face," Jake said.
"Hey, can I have a little sympathy here? I've been shot."
"It's a flesh wound. Don't be a baby."
Zach forced himself to peer down and examine the wound in his arm. It looked messy but shallow; the local anesthetic was starting to work and the pain was fading. The doctor arrived at that moment and Jake stepped back to allow him to work.
"You'll have a nice scar to impress all those ladies," Jake said.
"There's only one lady I want to impress."
"Really? It's serious between the two of you?"
"I love her."
Jake grinned. "Well, I'll be I'm pleased. I think. Shocked but pleased." His phone rang and he picked up, listened, his expression blank, then he shoved the phone back in his pocket.
"What was that about?" Zach asked. He had a bad feeling about this.
Jake shook his head. "I'll be right back."
Zach watched him go, the door swinging shut behind him. He wanted to follow, but the doctor was bandaging his arm and he couldn't move. "Crap."
Dani glanced down at her hands. Her fingers were still shaking and she tightened them into a fist, not wanting Jake to see just how scared she was. "How could you let him do this?" she snarled as soon as the door shut behind him.
Jake cast her a glance and raised an eyebrow. "Actually, it wasn't my idea."
Dani ignored the comment. Jake was the security expert, so it didn't matter whose idea it was-he should have stopped it. "He could have been killed."
"He was wearing a vest."
"And what if they'd shot him in his thick head instead?"
"But they didn't," Jake pointed out mildly. "You can go in and see him. The doctor is just finishing up."
Dani pursed her lips, considering her next words. "I don't plan on seeing him." She dug a hand into her bag and pulled out the note she'd written in the taxi driving over here. The note she'd written when she realized she really couldn't see Zach again. What they needed was a clean break and both of them to admit that it was never going to work. Zach had shown that when he'd excluded her out of tonight's event, when he'd told her he loved her and then gone out and risked his life. Why torment herself further?
A shaft of pain stabbed her right through the heart, but she ignored the pain and slapped the paper into Jake's hand. "Give him this."
Dani blinked back the tears that threatened to spill over. She hadn't cried in years, and she had no intention of starting now. She had to stay strong a little while longer, then she could get to Jess's place, go hide in the spare room, and bawl her eyes out.
Jake was staring at her, his disapproval almost palpable as she picked up her case. He glared at the paper in his hand but made no move to head into Zach's room. Instead, he leaned against the wall in the corridor, his eyes narrowed on her. "You're leaving him?"
"I was never really with him, Jake. It was just sex."
"Don't be more stupid than you have to be. He loves you. He maybe should have told you about tonight, but get over it. It's done, and he's safe."
The tight grip of fear that had held her since the newsflash loosened its hold, and she almost sagged.
He was safe.
She hadn't really believed it until now. She'd thought Jake was hiding the truth, or he was dead or Her mind had conjured up a whole load of horrible scenarios, each worse than the last.
Now the fear slid away.
Leaving her pissed. And that felt so much better.
She pursed her lips. "He loves me? So much that he keeps me out of the most important decision of his life?"