"Sure did," I told him, pulling a bag of gummy worms from my purse. "Dinner first though."
Theo pouted, but he knew better than to fight me on it. After heating him and Jack up some leftovers from the party, I cleaned the kitchen and retreated to my bedroom, locking the door before reaching for the locked box I kept buried in my underwear drawer. I slid in the key to open it and was greeted by a stack of baby registry catalogs, which made my heart ache as soon as I saw them. I ran my fingers over a picture of a pair of infant twins in matching onesies, and I was just about to save the page when Jack jiggled the doorknob.
"Babe?" he questioned, knocking on the wood.
"One sec," I called out, rushing to hide the box again.
Jack continued to jiggle the handle, growing increasingly more frantic. "Are you alright?"
I was just about to respond when the lock gave, allowing him to enter.
"What were you doing?" he asked, eyeing me rather suspiciously. He'd just seen me close the drawer, and he walked up to look inside it before I could protest.
"It's not what you think," I said as he examined the box. "It's just some stuff I've been collecting … "
Jack raised an eyebrow. "Stuff huh? Mind if I ask what?"
"Just some magazines," I said, attempting to pry the box from his grip. "A little privacy would be nice."
"What's the big deal?" Jack asked, giving me a sly smile. "Are they pornographic or something?"
"Of course not," I said, rolling my eyes. Enough was enough. Realizing that he wasn't about to let up, I unlocked the box for a second time and opened it up to reveal the stack of baby magazines.
Jack took a moment to flip through them before looking up at me again. "Why do you have these?"
"They give me ideas for stuff to buy Kiana," I lied, hoping he wouldn't pick up on the dishonesty in my tone.
"Yeah, but why hide them?"
"I'm not hiding them. This is just where I keep them."
Jack seemed satisfied by that answer and closed up the box.
"Where's Theo?" I asked him, taking a seat beside him on our bed and beginning to massage his shoulders.
"Outside," Jack said, nodding towards the window. "I just came in here to change so that I could mow the lawn. I'll make sure to keep an eye on him."
I nodded. I was beyond exhausted from the afternoons affairs. All I wanted to do was take a nap. I laid back and rested my head on my pillow, watching from my peripherals as Jack changed his clothing and came over to give me a kiss on the cheek. "You okay?" he asked me, stroking my hair back away from my face.
"Yeah," I said, giving him a small smile. "I'm just going to take a quick nap."
Jack nodded and left me alone to sleep. It was a couple of hours before I finally emerged from our bedroom, grabbing my purse and keys before going to track him down. "I'll be back," I called out across the back lawn to him. "We need a few things from the store."
"Can I come?" Theo asked, bounding up to me from the swing set.
I took a moment to study him. He slowed me down tremendously whenever I brought him to run errands, but then again, I hadn't been able to spend much time with him today. Plus, Jack looked like he needed a break. "Alright," I said, scrunching up my nose at how filthy he was. "But go change your clothes and wash up first."
Theo took off to do just that. We left shortly thereafter, and he surprised me with a very outlandish question when we were about halfway to Costco. "Are you and dad going to have another baby?" he asked, his voice rich with curiosity.
Taken somewhat aback, I glanced up at him in my rearview mirror. "Maybe someday," I said, smiling at him. "Do you want a little brother or a little sister?"
"Neither," Theo said, crossing his arms in protest.
I frowned. This was not the reaction I'd been expecting from him. Everything I'd read in my parenting books said that children were usually excited by the prospect of becoming an older sibling. "Why not?" I asked, keeping my tone as lighthearted as possible.
"Because," Theo said, glancing out the window. "You and dad won't care about me as much if there's a baby around."
"Theo, that's not true at all," I informed him, shaking my head. "Your father and I love you. Having another baby doesn't mean we'd love you any less."
"Are you sure?"
"Positive," I said, taking one hand off the wheel to reach back and pat his leg.
Theo studied my face for a second longer before looking back out at the passing scenery. I could tell that he was mulling over everything I'd just said, and the rest of the car ride was a silent one.
When we returned home, Jack came out of the house to help me carry in the groceries. As we were putting the food in the cupboards, Theo made sure to point out all the stuff he couldn't wait to dive into tomorrow. I smiled at him, but Jack seemed to notice that my mind was elsewhere. "We need to talk," he said once Theo retreated to his room to get ready for bed, lightly touching my shoulder to get me to stop loading the dishwasher.
I frowned and turned to look at him. "About?"
"Moving," Jack said, waving a hand around the room. "This place isn't exactly baby friendly."
It took me a full minute to process what he was alluding to. I just couldn't believe that he was speaking so casually about something he was so adamantly opposed to not even twenty-four hours prior. "What?" I finally questioned, sure I hadn't heard him correctly.
"You heard me," Jack said, giving me a small smile. It was obvious that he was aware that he was lifting my spirits just that much more with every word that left his mouth. "I think it's time we try for another baby."
It was music to my ears.
"I don't get it," I said, still skeptical. "Why now?"
Jack pulled me in closer then, wrapping an arm around my waist. "Why do you think?" he said, giving me a soft kiss on the lips. "I'm not completely dense. I know you're not just hoarding those magazines because of Kiana."
A wide smile broke across my face. "You're serious? You really want to start trying?"
Jack nodded. "I didn't realize how badly you wanted it until I saw your little stash," he said, once again alluding to my collection. I was embarrassed that he'd seen right through me, but the longer he spoke, the more excited I became. The circumstances surrounding Theo's conception were so unfavorable. I wanted nothing more than for us to get a second chance at doing it right.
"So we're really going to start trying?" I reiterated, crossing my fingers that he wouldn't have an abrupt change of heart.
"Yep," Jack said. "If that's what you want."
I frowned, pulling back to look him in the eyes. "What about what you want?"
"All I want is for you to be happy," Jack said, giving me another soft peck on the lips. "That's all I've ever wanted."
~ CHAPTER ONE ~
I saw Jack naked before I ever saw his face. He'd just come in from surfing and was using the garden shower to rinse the last of the salt from his bronzed flesh, but that wasn't all he was doing. From where I was standing in the grass, partially hidden by overgrown palm trees, I could see that he was stroking his length with an impressive vigor.
I should have run while I still had the chance. Instead I continued watching, memorizing every stroke for future reference. He had his fist wrapped firm around his base, fingers slick with soap, and his sturdy buttocks flexed with every tug.
Up until then, the only men I'd ever seen naked were the ones mom brought parading home from various cocktail bars. They were always half her age, always assholes, and always too comfortable walking around in the buff. When I was real little she'd introduce them to me as friends from the industry, but I wasn't dense. I knew just how "friendly" they really got with her.
To me she was just my mom, but that wasn't how the rest of the world saw her. To them she was the infamous Imani Woods. The world's first black super model and arguably one of the most beautiful women to ever walk the planet. She could have had any man she wanted, but instead she chose Robert Fitzgerald. They'd met at an event back in D.C. and had made the long distance thing work for awhile, but it ceased to be casual the day we made the cross-country move out to Kailua to live with him.