Today, though, he'd seen another side of being a Tolley, and he acknowledged that Uncle Theo and the board might never come around to accepting Cassidy.
He left his father's studio with nothing resolved and more questions in his own mind. Had he been just as guilty as Uncle Theo and the board of discriminating against Cassidy and her family and friends? He had kept their marriage quiet so that he could use her and Van to the best advantage when it came to beating Sam.
He sat in the front seat of the Cayenne and glanced over his shoulder into the backseat. Van was awake and waving his fist in front of his face.
"What do you think, buddy?" he asked the baby. "Should I tell the board to go to hell?"
The baby cooed and looked up at him with eyes that were shaped like Cassidy's. He knew he had his answer. The thing was, he didn't know if he could let go of the goals that had been a driving force in his life for so long. Could he give up beating Sam and taking over as CEO for Cassidy?
Not that she would ask him to. But if his family wouldn't accept her, he couldn't allow anyone to treat her with disdain. All she'd ever done was love him and give him a son.
He leaned over to brush the drool off Van's lower lip with his thumb and realized that his life had already changed, whether he wanted to admit it or not.
Cassidy was ready for Donovan that night. She'd gone to the salon to get her legs waxed. She'd taken a long bath and taken time with her appearance. She'd gone shopping after she'd left Emma and purchased a new wardrobe that fit her postpregnancy body.
She'd even cut her hair and had it highlighted. She looked more like her old self than she had in a long time. She felt more like her old self. She glanced in the mirror and saw the flirty woman she used to be.
Cassidy gave the housekeeper the night off and was prepared to fix a simple supper of grilled salmon and watercress salad whenever Donovan got home. She even had a shaker and ingredients ready to make martinis as soon as he walked in the door.
She heard his car in the back driveway and realized she was standing around, staring at the back door as if she were waiting for him. Which she was, but he didn't need to know that.
But she had no idea where she should go. She didn't watch TV and the study was on the other side of the house. Dammit. Why hadn't she planned this part better?
She went into the living room to the wet bar and started mixing the drinks.
"Cassidy, we're home. Where's Mrs. Winters?"
She went over to Donovan and gave him a kiss on the cheek before taking Van from him. "I gave her the night off. I thought it would be nice to have a family night."
"Sounds good. We need to talk anyway."
"About what?"
"My family … What were you making here?"
"Gin martinis."
"I'll do that. Are we doing dinner?"
"Yes. Salmon steaks on the grill and salad."
He grinned at her and she felt the groove she'd been searching for between them. "I'm going to go change Van out of his work clothes."
"I'll come with you. I need a change, too. Is the baby too small for the pool?"
"To be honest I have no idea. I think he'll be fine as long as we hold him."
They walked up the curving staircase in the front of the house. Donovan touched her shoulder and then caught a strand of her hair. She turned and looked at him eye to eye since she was a step higher than he was.
"I like your hair."
"Thank you," she said, her voice sounding a little hoarse to her own ears.
"God, Cassidy, you are so gorgeous." His mouth found hers and he kissed her the way she'd been longing for him to. His lips moved over hers with surety, his tongue teasing first her lips and then brushing over the seam of her mouth and thrusting inside. He tasted faintly of mint and something that she associated only with Donovan.
She leaned toward him, wanting to feel his chest pressing against her breasts, but instead felt Van's little hand on the bottom of her neck. She pulled back and stared at her husband for a long moment, remembering the orgasm she'd had on their wedding night. Man, that felt like a lifetime ago.
Donovan kissed the baby's hand and then walked around her on the stairs and continued up toward the master suite. "He was good for me today. Slept through two meetings and flirted with all the secretaries."
"Then he's a lot like his father."
"Funny. You don't get to the executive office by sleeping through meetings."
"But flirting helps?" she asked, teasing him, trying to find some kind of lightness to take her mind off of the physical ache she felt. Oh, how she wanted him.
"It doesn't hurt."
They entered the master suite and Donovan went into his closet, to change, she supposed. She laid Van on the center of their king-size bed. She took off his khaki pants and button-down shirt and then checked his diaper, which was dry.
The baby lay on his back cooing and chewing on his fingers until she handed him a little plastic pretzel chew toy. She wanted to go change but didn't feel safe turning her back for even a second while the baby was up on the high bed.
She took the bolster pillow from the head of the bed and put that on one side of Van and then used the other pillows to create a barricade around the baby. He wasn't crawling yet so he should be fine, she thought.
Her bathing suit was in the dresser in this room. She grabbed it quickly and then went back to the side of the bed. Van had fallen asleep in the midst of the pillows, the toy on his chest. She watched him as she got changed next to the bed.
Instead of the daring bikini she used to wear, she donned a new tankini, and when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror she thought she looked pretty good.
She turned back to Van, leaning over him to adjust one of the pillows. She felt Donovan's breath on the back of her neck a second before she felt his lips on her skin.
He nibbled down the length of her neck. She shivered under his touch as his hands found her waist and he drew her back against his body. His chest was bare and felt wonderful as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her fully against his body.
"Can we make love?" he asked. "Because I'm aching to be inside you."
"I can't take you," she said. "Not yet. But in a few more weeks I can."
"Then we'll have to do something else, because I can't keep my hands off you for another day."
Cassidy turned in his arms. "I want you, too."
"I know."
She arched one eyebrow at him. "How?"
"Your pheromones have been making me crazy since I walked in the door."
She started to respond but he kissed her mouth, cutting off her words and making it impossible to do anything but kiss him back.
Donovan couldn't keep his eyes or his hands off Cassidy as they prepared and ate dinner. Van was sleeping happily in his portable crib and for a moment Donovan felt that everything in his life was perfect. There was none of the intense competitive need to be better than anyone. To keep reaching for that elusive whatever that was always missing in his life.
Instead, as he looked across the table at Cassidy sipping her pinot grigio and wearing that bathing suit, he felt something close to contentment. And that scared him as nothing else could. Content men weren't hungry or successful. Content men sat on the sidelines while others made things happen, and Donovan knew he could never be the kind of guy who did that.
He wanted Cassidy, wanted this peace she brought to him and his life, and yet he knew that this was false. That there was no way they were going to have this moment for too much longer. His job was going to come between them.
She had her iPod plugged in to the Bose speaker system that surrounded the pool and the songs that were playing were romantic. After holding her and kissing her earlier, he wanted nothing more than to make love to her.
But he needed to talk to Cassidy. Needed to tell her that most of his family didn't know they were married. He needed to come clean about what had been going on.
Part of him didn't want to. That was work related and shouldn't be something for her to worry about. This marriage was what she'd wanted. And he was going to make everything at Tolley-Patterson work out.
"You're staring at me."
"Am I?" he asked.
She nodded. "Why?"
"Because I want to."