Her gaze drifted back to me and she tilted her head. “Why. Why it is some people think they can do as they please, flout the rules, color outside the lines without care or consequence. What it must be like to have that power,” she said.
“Lily, everyone colors inside the lines or gets punished. Those lines might be different than you’re accustomed to. They might be so broad you can’t see them, so broad you might not think they exist. But they are there for everyone. Even those you deem criminal,” I said.
“Perhaps, but I want to see them, know where they are,” she replied, her voice taking on a needy, almost desperate edge, one I found I wanted to soothe away. Before I could respond, she sobered, a calm coming over her so quickly that I halfway believed I’d imagined that earlier tension I’d heard. She gave me a faint smile. “This is rather new to me. Should I have waited three days to tell you about that?”
I laughed again, unable to remember a time that I had done so so frequently and so freely, and in a breath, the moment lightened.
“I admire honesty,” I said. “And speaking of…”
As I trailed off, I smoothed my hands up the curve of her waist, then over the soft skin of her stomach to cup her full breasts. They were a bounty, a perfect mix of soft and firm, enough to fill my hands to overflowing, the dark berries of her nipples standing atop them nearly begging for my touch.
I answered their call and kissed my way down her neck, her collarbone, over the plush slope of her breast. When I closed my lips around her nipple, she sighed and shifted in my lap, her slick sex brushing my skin and her changing position nestling my shaft deeper between her cheeks.
As I teased at the bud with the tip of my tongue, I teased the other with my hand, rolling it between my fingers, adding a little twist when she exhaled again. When I broke away, I stared down at the glistening nub, which shone and was puckered tight with gooseflesh.
“How did that happen?” I asked.
“Hmm?” she replied, looking down at me dreamily.
“Focus, Lily,” I said as I walked my fingers down her chest, through the hairs that covered her mound, until I rested at the V of her thighs, my fingers close but not touching her clit.
“What did you say?” she asked.
“How did that happen? Why have you never been with anyone?”
I was almost embarrassingly curious about her answer. Worse, I felt a sense of possession and ownership that was outsized. I would have her; this game was simply a prelude to that inevitable outcome. And that I would be the first only made the knowledge that much sweeter.
“I just never got around to it,” she said.
“That’s not an answer, Lily,” I said.
“It’s the only one I have. Between school and…other responsibilities, I was distracted.”
“And what’s caught your attention now?” I said.
“Not what. Who,” she replied.
“Who, then?” I asked, though I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hear the answer. I couldn’t even consider the idea that it wasn’t me, but was just as unable to consider that it was. I wanted it to be, wanted it more badly than I could admit. But if I heard her say it, any distance, any hope that I had of leaving this, leaving her unscathed was impossible.
She met my eyes, her face stone-serious. “You.”
I’d thought there was nothing she could say or do that would make me want her more, but with that single word she proved me wrong. The word was like a key that unlocked the cage around my heart, a heart that I had long thought dead.
I snagged a condom off the nightstand and unwrapped it. Lily watched me avidly as I pushed her back and then rolled the condom down to cover my unyieldingly hard shaft.
I lifted my hand to the center of her back and coaxed her to rise. Once she had, I slid down the bed and lined myself up with her entrance.
Then, hand steady at her hip, I guided her down slowly, breaching her a tiny bit at a time. When I was halfway in, she pushed out a breath and I stopped her, watching her for any sign of distress. She lifted her eyes at me and sighed out, the sound low, pleasure-filled. It sparked warmth in my chest and I pushed down again, my own eyes going heavy as her snug walls spread to accept me.
When I met the last bit of resistance, I locked my eyes with hers and then lifted as I pushed her down, joining us completely.
“Look at me, Lily,” I said when she slammed her eyes shut.
She peeled them open and watched me, something akin to wonder in her expression, a look I knew was mirrored in mine. I clenched my teeth tight and then lifted her and settled her again and again until she took over, moving in her own jerky motion. As she moved, I loosened my grip on her hip and moved my fingers forward to brush her clit.