Attach ments(106)

“That’s ridiculous,” she said. Which made him laugh.

“Absolutely,” he said.

“No, I mean it,” Beth said. “Men fall in love with their eyes.” He closed his. “That’s practically science,” she said.

“Maybe,” Lincoln said. Her fingers felt so good in his hair. “But I couldn’t see you, so …”

“So, what did you see?”

“Just …the sort of girl who would write the sort of things that you wrote.”

“What things?”

Lincoln opened his eyes. Beth was studying his face. She looked skeptical—maybe about more than just the last thing he said. This was important, he realized.

“Everything,” he said, sitting straighter, keeping hold of her waist. “Everything you wrote about your work, about your boyfriend …The way you comforted Jennifer and made her laugh, through the baby and after. I pictured a girl who could be that kind, and that kind of funny. I pictured a girl who was that alive …”

She looked guarded. Lincoln couldn’t tell from her eyes whether he was pushing her away or winning her over.

“A girl who never got tired of her favorite movies,” he said softly. “Who saved dresses like ticket stubs. Who could get high on the weather …

“I pictured a girl who made every moment, everything she touched, and everyone around her feel lighter and sweeter.

“I pictured you,” he said. “I just didn’t know what you looked like.

“And then, when I did know what you looked like, you looked like the girl who was all those things.

You looked like the girl I loved.”

Beth’s fingers trembled in his hair, and her forehead dropped against his. A heavy, wet tear fell onto Lincoln’s lips, and he licked it. He pulled her close, as close as he could. Like he didn’t care for the moment whether she could breathe. Like there were two of them and only one parachute.

“Beth,” he barely said, pressing his face against hers until their lashes brushed, pressing his hand into the small of her back. “I don’t think I can explain it. I don’t think I can make it make any more sense. But I’ll keep trying. If you want me to.”

She almost shook her head. “No,” she said, “no more explaining. Or apologizing. I don’t think it matters anymore how we ended up here. I just …I want to stay …I want …”

He kissed her then.

There.

In the middle of the sentence.





“I DON’T THINK your mom liked me,” Beth said. They were on the way back to his apartment and she was balancing a giant pan of leftover lasagna on her lap.

“I think she loved you,” he said. “That’s why she looked so miserable. She would have been much happier if there was something obviously wrong with you. You should have seen her face when you said you were voting for Ralph Nader.”

“I did. She looked pissed.”

“Because she loves Ralph Nader.”

“Why did your sister laugh?”

“Because she loves to see my mom thwarted.”

Beth shook her head. It was raining outside, and her hair was wet and curling around her forehead.

“That’s crazy,” she said.

“Now you’re getting it,” he said.

They’d decided not to tell his mom or Eve—or anyone—exactly how they’d met. They told them they’d met at work. (“Which is true,” Beth said. “Technically.”) Only Christine knew the whole truth —well, and Jennifer, of course, and probably Mitch. Beth said they could tell whomever they wanted after they’d been together long enough for it to seem like a bizarre footnote to their relationship. And not the whole freaky story.

“Well, my parents love you,” she said, hugging the lasagna. “There’s nothing tricky about it. My mom thinks you have a delightful sense of humor, and my dad told me he thinks you’re quite handsome. ‘Manly,’ he said. He even commented on the size of your hands. Don’t be surprised if he tries to dance with you at our wedding …”

Beth stopped talking abruptly. When Lincoln looked over, she’d turned her face to the window.

“I’ll dance with your dad,” he said, setting his hand on the back of her neck and brushing her cheek with his thumb. “As long as he leads …I’m not much of a dancer.”

When she smiled up at him, he felt his heart swell against the inside of his chest. He felt that way all the time now. Even when he was holding her, it felt like there was something inside of him trying to burst out and embrace her.

“I didn’t know it could be like this,” she said later.