Camella sat for a long moment, saying nothing. “I forgive you,” she said bleakly. She got up quickly and left the shelter.
Rizpah left Caleb with Rhoda and went out to her friend. Camella sat alone near the prow, weeping. Rizpah sat down with her. “What is it?” she said softly.
“I’ve always wanted her to beg for my forgiveness. I’ve prayed for this moment, just so she’d know what I’ve felt. And now I feel so ashamed.”
Camella wiped the tears from her cheeks and stared up at the sail. “Rhoda and I are a lot alike. She wanted a child. I wanted a husband who would love me the way my brother loved her.”
“And now you have one another.”
“Maybe. If we can learn to bear one another’s burdens instead of adding to them.”
“Now is a good time to start,” Rizpah said softly. Camella studied her friend’s face for a moment, then nodded. They returned to the shelter. Lysia took Caleb and played with him as her mother sat down nearby Rhoda.
“Rhoda,” she said softly, hesitant. “I want to speak with you about the past.”
“You don’t have to tell me anything.”
“Please, Rhoda. Just this once, let me talk about it, and then I’ll never mention it again.” She waited until Rhoda nodded before going on. “When Callistus left me, I was so hurt. You can’t imagine how much I loved him and how foolish I was over him. I knew when I left my family and went to him that what I was doing was wrong, but I didn’t care. All I could think about was being with him. And then he turned out to be everything my family and friends told me he was. I had nowhere to go, no one to take care of me. I even thought about drowning Lysia and committing suicide.”
Rhoda closed her eyes, shaking softly with silent weeping.
Camella lowered her head. “You didn’t know how bad it was, Rhoda. Prochorus knew, but he didn’t offer any help. I finally swallowed my pride and asked him for it, and he said he’d speak to you first before he decided.” She didn’t say anything for a moment. She looked away, tears running down her cheeks, swallowing convulsively.
“I knew I’d created my own problems, but all I could think about was my own brother cared more for your feelings than he did for my life.” She let out her breath shakily. “I was jealous of you. I came into your home full of hurt feelings and resentment. I took offense at everything you said and I did everything I could to come between you and my brother. I’ve made everyone miserable for the past several years, and now you ask for my forgiveness when it’s your forgiveness I need.”
Rhoda leaned forward, stretching out her hands. Camella grasped them. Pride cast aside, she cried openly. “He loved you. You know he did. And he adored Lysia as much as I do. You say you’ll never have a child, Rhoda, but Lysia is your daughter as much as mine. She loves you. I love you, too.”
They talked far into the night, about Prochorus, about their concerns of what they would do when they reached Rome. Rizpah lay down with Caleb to her breast and listened. As joy over the reconciliation swept over her, she looked out through the tent opening and saw Atretes.
He was standing at the railing, his blonde hair whipped about his face by the wind. He looked so grim, so unrelenting. What would her future and Caleb’s be when they reached the dark forests of Germania?
17
The Alexandrian freighter entered the imperial harbor of Ostia on the Ides of March. The port at the mouth of the Tiber built by Ancus Marcius seven hundred years before had grown into a commercial and storage center for Rome’s grain supplies as well as a port of refitting and repair for vessels going to Portus. Galleys from the Roman fleet were in noticeable numbers alongside a royal barge decorated for an elaborate celebration.
Theophilus called the Christians together as the ship was being towed into the harbor.
“I won’t be able to meet with you again until I deliver the gifts to the emperor and am dismissed of my duties. When you disembark, follow the main road out of Ostia. It will take you to the gates of Rome. Look for the Temple of Mars. Nearby is a marketplace. When you find the vendors of fruits and vegetables, ask for a man named Tropas. He has a booth among them. He’s one of us and can be trusted. He’ll direct you to safe housing.”
Rizpah went to Atretes to relay Theophilus’ instructions, but he dismissed them. “We go on our own,” he said, picking up the blanket rolls and last of the food supplies.
“Is that wise?” Rizpah said, afraid to leave the others. She saw the warning glint of anger in his blue eyes. Packs already tied to his back, Atretes took Caleb from her and headed for the line of passengers disembarking.