As Sure as the Dawn(63)

She stopped just outside the fanum, her dark, luminous eyes meeting his. “There’s a place for you at the inn,” she said.

He allowed his gaze to drift. “Is there?” He wondered if she was aware of the effect she had on him.

When she didn’t answer, Peter looked up at her. “Why’s your face all red?”

Atretes laughed and ruffled his hair. “Go back to your mother and father, boy.”

“But . . .”

“Go.” It was a command this time.

“I’ll get lost,” Peter said, still resisting.

“Follow the road back up the hill. Unless you’re a baby who needs a woman to hold your hand.”

Peter obeyed. “There’s a booth near ours,” he said, walking backward. “You can sleep there.”

“Was that necessary?” Rizpah said when the boy was out of hearing.

“You’d rather I didn’t send him away?” he said, pretending to be obtuse. His eyes gleamed. “I’ll call him back if you feel safer with him around.”

“You deliberately embarrassed me,” she said, curbing her annoyance with him.

His smile turned sardonic. “Is it what I said or what’s in your own mind that embarrassed you?” A faint frown flickered across her face, and he tilted his head slightly, his smile challenging. He half expected her to go back to the inn and the safety of her friends. Instead, she stayed, though clearly nervous about doing so. Something was on her mind.

“We need to talk.”

“If you want to talk, come inside and sit.” He noted she entered the fanum as though entering a lion’s cage. She sat down on the marble bench opposite him and folded her hands primly in her lap.

“We need to reach some kind of understanding before we go any further.”

Atretes’ mouth curved slowly. “We haven’t gone anywhere yet.”

“Please consider my words seriously, Atretes.”

“Oh, I am serious, deadly serious,” he said coolly, unwilling to question why his emotions were roiling. He knew the kind of understanding he wanted, but doubted she would be agreeable. The truth have it, he would be disappointed in her if she was.

“What will be our relationship when we reach Germania?”

“What will it be?” He lifted a brow.

She clasped her hands more tensely. If only his face were not so shuttered and his tone so mocking. “I’m not exactly a servant, but I’m not . . .” She grimaced, searching for words.

“A wife, either,” he said for her. She was beautifully formed, more beautiful, he imagined, than Julia had been.

Her color heightened. Even Shimei had never looked at her with such raw hunger. Her body responded to what she saw in Atretes’ eyes, and heat spread. With it came realization. “I’ve given you the wrong impression,” she said and rose.

“Where are you going?”

“Back to the inn,” she said, eager to escape. Before she could, he caught hold of her wrist.

“Why?”

Her breath was constricted. “Let go, Atretes. This isn’t a good time or place for us to talk about anything.”

“Because you haven’t got a baby in your arms?” He rose. “Do you feel vulnerable without your human shield?”

“Caleb isn’t a shield, but at least when I’m holding him, you see me as a mother and not as . . . as . . .”

“A woman?” He ran his thumb along the smooth, silky skin of her wrist and wondered how the rest of her would feel. His own pulse was hammering, rousing his defensive anger. “You asked me a question. How about this answer? By the time we reach Germania, my son won’t need a wet nurse.”

“He’ll still need a mother.”

“A foster mother of his own kin.” The bones of her wrist felt as fragile as a bird’s, but far less fragile than what he saw in her dark eyes. He had hurt her deeply with his cutting words. Worse, he had frightened her. He let go of her.

Rizpah sat down on the bench again because her legs wouldn’t hold her. She fought back tears.

Atretes silently cursed himself. He wanted to say he was sorry, but the words choked him. Why had he lashed out at her? To avenge himself for what others had done to him? Or for what he had felt when he saw her walking down the street toward him?

She looked up at him, her brown eyes swimming. “I have left home and country behind, Atretes. Have I done so that you might take Caleb from me when we reach yours?”

In truth, Atretes could imagine no other woman caring for his son but her. “No,” he said. “I won’t take him from you. I swear on my sword.”

She reached out impulsively and took his hand between both of hers. “I believe you without your oath.”