“He feeds you like a pet.”
“My hands and arms were full with your son. Had you been beside me, I would have taken the bread from your hand!”
His heart beat fast. He looked into her dark brown eyes and saw something that warmed his insides. When his gaze dropped to her mouth, she lowered her head. His temper rose again. “Why do you always avoid me?” he said roughly.
“I don’t.”
“You do. You’ve cut me off from my own son.”
She looked up at him again, her cheeks pale from the cold. “It’s you who avoid us.”
“I care nothing about them,” he said, jerking his chin in a sharp dismissal of the rest.
“Nor about me,” she said. “I even wonder sometimes how deeply you care for your own son. Do you love him? Or is it simply a matter of having what you think belongs to you?”
“You both belong to me.”
“Careful where you tread, my lord. You’re paying me a denarius a day. Remember?”
He was pleased to have made her angry and grinned down at her to show her so. “You look more yourself this morning. On fire.” She turned from him, and he yanked her back. Catching hold of both her shoulders, he lowered his head close to hers. “Take up your sword, Rizpah. Cross it with mine and see what it gets you. Do it. I’m sorely in need of a fight.”
She said nothing, but he saw it was a struggle. Clearly, it wasn’t fear that kept her silent, for he saw no evidence of it in her steady gaze. He loosened his hands, wondering if he had hurt her. It hadn’t been his intent.
“I wish you would join us and hear the good news,” she said with exasperating calm.
He cupped the back of her head and pulled her close, his lips against her ear. “I’ll embrace you, my beauty, but I’ll never embrace your god or your religion.” Breathing in her scent, he let her go, satisfied to see he had rattled her.
Rizpah retreated to the tent she shared with Camella and Lysia.
From where he stood with the others, Theophilus glanced at her as she ducked inside the tent and then looked at Atretes thoughtfully.
Safely inside the shelter, Rizpah picked up Caleb. He was in a mood to play, and she needed distraction from the feelings Atretes roused in her. Her heart was still racing.
“Are you all right?” Camella said, looking at her curiously.
“Of course. Why do you ask?”
“You’re shaking.”
“It’s cold this morning.”
“You don’t look cold. You look . . . alive.”
Rizpah could feel the heat filling her cheeks and hoped dim light from the sunrise would conceal her embarrassment. She felt alive. She was trembling, her heart still pounding from the encounter with Atretes.
O God, I don’t want to feel this way again, not about him!
“Lysia, why don’t you go and see if Rhoda needs any help this morning?” Camella said.
“Yes, Mother.”
Glancing at Rizpah, Camella picked up her blanket. “Did you speak with Atretes?” she said as she folded it.
“Is it that obvious?”
Camella set the blanket down and sat on it. “Not so the others would notice. Unless they were watching.”
“Are they?”
Camella grimaced. “Rhoda is. So is Theophilus, though for different reasons. Besides,” she said with faint amusement, “wherever Atretes is, everyone knows he’s there.”
“Who could ignore him when he’s in a temper and marching past us?”
“I wasn’t speaking of moments like that.”
“His beauty, you mean.”
“I’ve never seen a more handsome man, but even his beauty would pale if he didn’t possess some undefinable quality as well.” She took her shawl and drew it around her shoulders. “Had Theophilus not come aboard, Atretes might easily have become our leader.”
“God forbid.”
“Apparently, he did,” Camella said with a smile and then explained. “A man like Atretes will never walk unnoticed. He’ll either lead men to God or he’ll lead them away.”
Rizpah turned Caleb onto his stomach and watched him try to crawl. “Atretes rejects Christ.”
“For now.”
Rizpah looked at her. “If you can lead him to Christ, please do so. With my blessing.”
Camella’s smile disappeared. “I don’t think so. I wouldn’t dare get so close.” She gave Rizpah a self-deprecating smile. “I know myself. I succumb too easily to fleshly passions. Lysia is evidence of that, though I’d rather give up my life than not have had her. And most of the others have their own struggles, too. I know you’ve noticed the way Eunice looks at Mnason, how she always seems to end up near him, oblivious to how it looks to anyone. Even Parmenas.” She shook her head sadly. “No, we have too much already to face. I think Atretes is going to be up to you.”