Arrogant Bastard(34)

It’s all too much.

I’m heating up, waiting for his answer, my body braced stiff.

“Go to bed, Waverly.”

My jaw drops. He steps closer, reaching for me in the dark. Pulling my arm, he guides me into a standing position and nods toward the door. I could slap him. His untimely rejection doesn’t sting, it burns.

“You’re an asshole.” It’s the first time I’ve ever sworn out loud, and my words are well-warranted.

“I’m protecting you.”

“From what?!”

“From yourself.”

I’m insulted. I’m not sure what to even say. “You have a lot of nerve, Jensen.”

“As do you.” He smirks in the dark. “You’re all over the fucking place. You’re hot, you’re cold, you’re mean, you’re nice. You’re throwing yourself at me now, but what’s going to happen tomorrow? When you wake up in the morning and feel guilty? Forgive me if I’m opting to get off the fucking Waverly Miller rollercoaster.”

I’m not delusional enough to believe his observations are incorrect. He’s dead on, so far.

“So look,” he breathes. “I’m doing you a favor. It’s not that I don’t want to kiss you.” He reaches for my face, cupping my cheek and running his thumb across my bottom lip. My breathing suspends until his hand falls. “I could kiss this mouth all fucking night. But I don’t think I could stop there. Matter of fact, I know I couldn’t. And I don’t want you to wake up tomorrow and regret your decision.”

“I won’t regret it.”

“That’s what you’re saying now.”

“I get it. I get that I’m kind of all over the place,” I sigh, placing my palm across my chest. “It ends now.”

The corner of his full mouth curls up. “Don’t beg, Waverly. It’s not a good look for you.”

I tug at the collar of my shirt, my ears burning hot as I blink away misty eyes.

Rejection was never one of the worst-case scenarios I’d dreamed up when thinking of Jensen late at night. My eyes burn and then water. Thick, salty tears fall down my cheeks, and I pray he can’t see them through the darkness.

I push past him, our shoulders brushing. He could’ve kissed me all night long, and I wouldn’t have regretted a single thing in the morning. I know that to be true.

I can’t win with him.

“Go to hell, Jensen.”





CHAPTER 13





I can’t sleep.

I know I did the right thing.

But I can’t sleep.

The glaring red numbers on my alarm tell me if I go to sleep now, I’ll get a measly four hours, but my body is nothing but live wire. I’m not going to sleep anytime soon.

I pad across the room and grab my vodka bottle from my dresser drawer, uncapping it and swallowing two mouthfuls before carefully sliding it under a mess of boxers. I make a mental note to find a better spot for that in the morning. Who knows who’ll be on laundry duty tomorrow, and Mark Miller would flip his shit if he knew his vagabond-spiritual-stepson was sneaking contraband around his freakish family.

The liquor is cheap and burns like fire going down, but it doesn’t take long before my body is warm and numb. The room spins, but I welcome it. I’m on a fucking merry-go-round anyway, so what’s the difference?

Waverly shouldn’t have thrown herself at me. She doesn’t know what she’s getting into. She deserves rainbows and hearts and flowers and shit like that. She deserves a boyfriend with a letterman’s jacket and a Camaro, not me. I’d fuck her over without even trying. I’m not sure I’m capable of feeling any of those saccharine, disgusting, lovesick emotions, anyway. It’s just not how I’m built.

She needs to get laid, just not by me. Not that I don’t want that. I’d fuck the hell out of that. But my cock does better buried in something it doesn’t give two shits about.

She’s gorgeous. She’s smart. She’s sweet and kind, if slightly confused. She’s a good girl, and she was better off before I opened my big, fat mouth all because I was bored. This would probably be the one time in my life I’d ever agree with Josiah Mackey—I don’t deserve someone like her. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to see her married off to some polygamist asshole, but I had no business fucking with her and opening that can of worms.

I hope she doesn’t stir shit up with her dad. He’s going to want to know why she doesn’t want to talk to me all of a sudden, and I’m pretty sure it’s only a matter of time before he starts piecing things together.

If he hasn’t already.

It would’ve been fun to fuck her, though. Those round, untouched tits begging to be fondled. That perky ass in desperate need of grabbing. I’m sure her pussy’s just as tightly wound as her personality.