«And if Requiem is okay?»
«Then it is controllable, incredibly powerful, but controllable. It is something our enemies and allies will fear and lust after, but they will not fear us too much, or lust too greatly. It is the difference between having a weapon that one can use, and one that you dare never use.»
«Like nuclear bombs,» I said.
He nodded. «Oui.»
I frowned at him. «Define 'feed the ardeur'?»
He made a sound that was half tsk and half throat sound. «Feed, feed, ma petite. He is not ugly. Feed upon him, completely, no tasting, no holding back. Feed, and if he can withstand it, then the ballet tonight goes on, the party after.»
I looked behind me to Requiem. He was trying for a neutral look, and failing. «Let me test my understanding: you want me to make love to another man, and feed the ardeur off him?»
«Yes,» he said.
If Ronnie had been there, she'd have shot herself, or maybe shot me. I wasn't planning on keeping Requiem. This was supposed to be like a one-night stand. But I didn't believe it. I'd never had sex with anyone just once. «I can't do another permanent man in my life, Jean-Claude. I can't.»
«Think of him as you think of Jason. What did he call himself, your fuck buddy?»
I raised my eyebrows at him, then turned and looked at Requiem. «Did you hear that?»
«I did.»
«Do you understand what the term means?»
«It means someone who is your friend, that you sometimes have sex with, but it is not a relationship. Though I prefer the term fib for it.»
«Fib?» I made it a question.
«Friends in bed, fib.»
«Prettier,» I said. «Fine, you okay with just being my friend in bed?»
«Your heart speaks to others, Anita, I know this. My heart speaks to no one else. But this is not a matter of hearts, but a matter of flesh and blood.» He held his hand out to me. «Come to me, Anita, please. I have thrown off your silken chains for this chance to be with you; do not deny me.»
Maybe it was the way Requiem talked, all poetry and so emotional sounding. I was a modern girl; I wasn't used to it. Jean-Claude could talk pretty when he wanted to, but he was my serious sweetie, and hearing it from someone who was supposed to be casual just didn't ring right. It was as if the words didn't match the situation. How could you talk about silken chains if you weren't serious? Fuck buddies didn't say things like that, did they? Of course, my experience with the whole concept of fuck buddies was pretty limited, so maybe I was just wrong. Wrong about so many things.
I stared at Requiem, and felt nothing. He was pretty, but pretty had never been enough for me. I was almost perfectly happy in parts of my personal life, for the first time in a long time. I did not want to screw that up, and I'd learned that every new addition had a chance of blowing it all sky-high.
Requiem let his arm fall. «You simply do not want me, do you?» He sounded sad, and more lost than when I'd rolled him.
I don't know what I would have said, because the door opening saved me. Asher glided in, as if his feet weren't quite touching the ground under the golden satin robe. His hair spread out around the robe, putting the shiny cloth to shame by contrast. He glanced at the bed and flashed a wide smile. «Oh, good, I'm in time to watch.»
I gave him an unfriendly look.
He shrugged and smiled, way too pleased with himself. «Elinore has filled me in on what's been happening in here. When I woke early, I realized that if I was awake then so was Meng Die.»
That stopped us all, made us all turn to him. Remus actually stepped away from the wall as if he'd go running.
Asher waved him back. «She's still in the coffin, though she does want out. She's agreed to behave herself.»
«She vowed she would kill me, or scar me so badly that Anita would not want me,» Requiem said.
Asher went to Jean-Claude where he still stood by the bed. He hugged the other man from behind, laying his head on Jean-Claude's shoulder, so that his scarred cheek was bare to the light. «Yes, I was there when she made that particular threat. She looked at me, and said she'd forgotten that Anita liked scars.» His face tried for neutral when he said it, but failed. A flash of anger flared through the paleness of his eyes, making them flicker for a second like icy sapphires caught in light.
Jean-Claude hugged his arm where it lay across his chest. He leaned his face against the top of Asher's hair, and said, «How did you get Meng Die to see reason?»
«She said, for such power as she felt when you did Augustine she would play virgin. There's always another lover, but this kind of power is rare.»