“Even so, I must stay here.”
He looked at her, wanting to accept her words and respect her decision. But he couldn’t. He kept pressing, using whatever means he could to dissuade her from staying. Had he stopped to ask himself why he was so determined, he would simply have thought it was his concern for her that drove him. . . .
He would never have imagined or believed that there was a deeper, darker purpose at work.
“And if I leave Ephesus?” he said in gentle challenge. “Where will you go when she dies? If I’m no longer here, what will you do?”
She shook her head, unable to think beyond now.
“You need to think, Hadassah. We belong together. Think of what we could learn and what we could do for others. Once Julia’s gone, you’ll have to leave.”
“When will you be leaving?”
“In a few days,” he said, lying to her for the first time and having no compunction about it because he thought it was for her own good. “I’ll be referring all my patients to Phlegon and Troas.” He gave her a wry smile. “Needless to say, they’ll both be surprised to hear from me. We don’t agree on a lot of things, but they’re still the most skilled and knowledgeable physicians in Ephesus. I’d rather entrust patients to them than have them seek help from the priests of the Asklepion.”
Hadassah shook her head. “I’ve done everything I know to do here,” she whispered.
Alexander wasn’t sure if she spoke to him or to herself, but he sensed her weakening. A force he didn’t recognize urged him to grasp the opportunity. “You’ve done everything known to man. What more can you do but that?”
“Trust in God.”
He moved away in frustration. “I’ll be leaving as soon as I settle the practice.”
“What of Rashid?” she asked.
“He’ll stay and watch.”
“Take him with you.”
He looked at her in surprise. “Even if I wanted him along, he wouldn’t go. You know that. And now that Marcus knows Rashid attacked him, his life might be forfeit. You know what they do to a slave who raises his hand against a Roman.”
“Then he must go with you.”
“He won’t go unless you do.”
Hadassah was torn; Rashid’s situation seemed to overshadow the concerns she had fixed upon Julia.
It was what Alexander had hoped, convinced he was putting her first. “Send word what you decide.” He leaned down to kiss her cheek through the veils. “You can do no more here. Let the poor girl rest in peace, Hadassah. Let her go.”
Hadassah watched him leave the room, disturbed by what he had said. Let her go? Let her go to hell? Out of habit, she went to the Lord. What am I to do? Show me what is true.
She knew Alexander had spoken out of sincere concern for her and Rashid. Yet as she prayed, she knew something was not quite right in all he said.
And then it came. She saw clearly what lay behind her sense of unrest, for the Spirit within her revealed it to her. All was not lost. Nothing was too hard for God. Even impending death could not keep him from those who were his own . . . and Julia might still be one of God’s own. Were Hadassah to leave now, she would be abandoning Julia when she most needed her.
O Lord God, forgive my doubt, and renew your Spirit within me that I may fulfill your purpose here. Let me not lean upon my own understanding or Alexander’s.
As she rose, she knew Alexander had not recognized the unseen forces at work in what he had just tried to do. He had not recognized the seed of the tare, nor the dark, malevolent enemy who had given him the words to sow and thus weaken her.
It might have worked. Might well have done so. But for the grace of God . . . awed, grateful, Hadassah once again took her place beside Julia’s bed, praising God for his protection.
Lavinnia came in with a tray of food at dusk. She looked at the untouched food she had brought at midday and glanced at Azar. “Was the meal not to your liking, my lady?”
“I’m sure the food is wonderful, Lavinnia, but please take the trays away. I will send for something when I’m ready.” The girl did as she asked, knowing from her words that Lady Azar would fast and pray until the end came. Lavinnia returned and took the second tray. “May I bring you wine, my lady?”
“A bowl of cool water from the fountain would be nice.”
Lavinnia came back quickly with what Hadassah wanted. “Thank you, Lavinnia.” She dipped a fresh cloth in the water and wrung it out. She washed Julia’s face gently. Julia didn’t awaken.
Marcus came during the next afternoon. Hadassah rose, making way for him as he sat down beside the bed. He seemed preoccupied, and Hadassah wondered if he was thinking over whatever it was that Ezra Barjachin had come to discuss with him. He took his sister’s limp hand between his and watched her face. When he spoke, Hadassah knew he addressed her.