Always a Warrior(57)
“Laurie,” Damien said softly behind her.
His hands on her shoulders, he turned her to face him. She stared up at him, into the dark chocolate pools of his eyes, and wished for his level of confidence as she imprinted him again on her memory.
“I have to go,” he said. “But I don’t want to leave you alone like this.”
ALWAYS A WARRIOR Patricia Bruening
83
She drank him into her senses, inhaled the pure male scent of him. She didn’t want him to go but the longer he stayed, the closer she came to begging him to stay—or take her with him.
Neither option was feasible.
“Go back to the Navy, Damien. I’ll be fine.” She tried to move away, but he hauled her against his muscled chest.
“I won’t,” he growled harshly, his dark eyes full of bitter longing. “I won’t be fine at all.”
He crushed his mouth to hers in a bruising, passionate kiss that set her senses on fire. Her lips parted in automatic, gasping response and his tongue plunged in to slide over hers. Her knees went weak on a wave of desire and she clutched at him for support. Clinging, she kissed him back with all the hunger he aroused in her. He finally dragged his mouth from hers. Still clutching at him, she searched his hungry eyes.
She swallowed her pride in a painful gulp, unwilling to just let him walk away. “Will I see you again?”
“Do you really want to?” He sounded doubtful despite to fire in his eyes.
“You have to ask?” She linked her fingers behind his neck, pressed closer until her breasts rubbed his chest, and smiled at his groan of desire.
“I think the question is do you want to?” She held her breath, waiting and hoping as endless seconds ticked by.
“I’ll come back.” He kissed her again, gently, his lips lingering on hers.
Then he turned and strolled out of her house and, she suspected, out of her life in spite of his words. A heavy sigh of resignation shuddered slowly from her. She had survived a mission into a terrorist camp but would she survive Damien McAllister’s effect on her heart?
* * * *
Damien drove back to Tucson telling himself he needed a clean break from Laurie. It would be better for her as well as him. But he was selfish. He wanted her. He had to report back to San Diego. If he wasn’t needed for a mission, he might take some leave time. He had a lot of leave time saved. He rarely, if ever, used it.
“Damn it!” he cursed his selfish thoughts and needs. “It’s not fair to drop in and out of her life in my spare time. I can’t commit and she doesn’t fit into my life. No one does.”
He pounded the steering wheel in frustration. Damn, but he wanted her. And not just to satisfy his sexual urges. He gave serious though brief consideration to turning the car around and hauling ass back to her. He tightened his grip on the steering wheel. The Navy took a very dim view of dereliction of duty and its men going AWOL.
He scowled at the slow moving car ahead of him then zipped around it. He could not give Laurie what she wanted, needed, or deserved. Nor could he demand that she even attempt to share his volatile life. So he had to leave her alone and let her get on with her life.
At Tucson International Airport, Damien returned the rental car and waited for the next available flight to San Diego. He prowled the airport then settled in the lounge and nursed a scotch until his flight was called—the red-eye flight. He thought to sleep for a couple of hours but his mind took him on an erotic journey of the love he had forced himself to leave behind.
* * * *
While Damien dozed fitfully in the air, Laurie lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling.
Damien invaded her thoughts, keeping sleep at bay. She was alone. She was tired. Sleep should have been fast and deep after everything she had endured. She sighed and rolled over. But sleep eluded her. He had said he would come back to her. If he did, she would welcome him with open arms and a full heart. But letting him go again would get harder every time she said good bye.
ALWAYS A WARRIOR Patricia Bruening
84
Maybe a clean break was best, she mused. Damien did not want emotional entanglements so she kept her love to herself. But she had no doubt he read it in her eyes. She would never have made love with him if she had not been in love with him. She simply was not made that way.
They had shared a wild passion she would never forget. With a ragged groan, she accepted that she would never banish him from her mind and certainly not from her heart.
She let the memories roll over her. Every kiss, every touch, every murmured word and endearment, sent yearnings through her body until she squirmed restlessly. It wasn’t just passion, she knew, though that was extraordinary beyond anything she had ever imagined. Those very vulnerable moments she had shared with him also endeared him to her. And it fascinated her that he slid into professional soldier mode in the blink of an eye.